Cry Me A River

#q: para #q:snuggle bunny #bah #sorry fuck

Nelson was equal parts nervous, excited, turned on, and determined. Grabbing his favourite non-toxic pens that had an array of colours, he shoved them into a case and, on a whim, grabbed the last two bananas that were sitting on his counter before heading to Q’s.

Seeing the dom in the uniform, even just in a photo, oh man, it had done things to him. Things he was hell bent on not freaking out about this time. He had been seeing Miss Pillsbury and while she was gently encouraging him to see a more qualified therapist about Alain’s death, she was helping him understand his reactions. He could do this.

Adjusting all the stuff in his arms, Nelson, knocked on Q’s door and let out a sharp breath as he knelt quickly, almost forgetting the whole kneeling thing yet again. @q-sylvester

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PM: Awe, you flatter me, Nelson. Thank you. Heh, well, I’ll spare you another photo of a handsome soldier then, maybe share it with you some other night. Or maybe one of the two of us ;]P

Yeah, like, right now. You can stay over, we can have some fun. I can make vegan grilled cheese.. Come be my snuggle bunny, Nel.

PM: Not flattery, sir, just the truth. Are you kidding me? Is there seriously a picture of the two of you together both in uniform?? I can’t even imagine it.

Okay, I’ll just grab the stuff and be right over... writing tutor, vegan grilled cheese eating, snuggle bunny on the inbound, sir!

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PM: You okay over there, handsome? Took you a bit to reply. Glad to see my uniform can be used for something more than just a Halloween costume. I can show him to you, if you want, because … he’s gorgeous. Thank you. It’s even better in person.

Would you… want to come over, and introduce me to this graphoerotica? It’s sounds so tactile. I love it.

PM: Yes, I’m good, I just spaced out a bit staring at that picture. So embarrassing but you honestly look so friggen amazing. You’ve set the bar pretty high, y’know, I don’t know if I can handle two gorgeous men in uniform in one night.

I would, yeah, I can bring some stuff over and show you if you want. Like right now?

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#q: text #ALL the bucky gifs!!

PM: Would you like to see a picture? I wore it for Halloween this year. It’s a bit more old-fashioned, but it’s pretty great. You must really love the military man look; you would have died seeing my ex. Seriously, he was just… mmf.

I think it’s unique as hell, Nelson. That sounds super intimate, I would love to actually try that out. I’m a sucker for intimate bonding.

SMS:

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PM (delayed): Oh my god, it’s even better than I was imagining. The older style uniforms are the best ones, sir, don’t even worry about it. I don’t know about your ex but you’re pretty mmf youself. You make that look extra good.

I’ve got all sorts of non-toxic and edible stuff so if you ever need anything just say the word. Though the edible stuff is sort of gross tasting, straight up chocolate sauce would probably be better if you wanted to lick it off after.

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PM: A boy as cute as you? Are you kidding? Of course I remembered. So, if I’m walking around like a Sergeant, you want it to be a sexual scene? Good to know. I mean, we could do both. If I steal you for 48 hours… we could do one day that revolves around a sexual scene, and one that revolves around non-sexual?

Writing on people? That’s interesting. I’ve never done that, but that kind of sounds like fun. That’s not weird, it’s unique, and I love that.

PM: Ah, well, you never know, it’s happened before. Bang on the money, sir, god, I can’t get the picture of you as a military man out of my head now. Both is good, I’d be game for that, I think.

I don’t know about unique but there’s so many ways you can do it, sharpies, pens, charcoal, paint with different kinds of brushes, finger painting, hell even chocolate sauce... I guess it can be pretty intimate.

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PM: You introduced yourself when I first arrived, handsome. I never forget a face. It’s nice to speak to you again, Nelson. I would love to do a scene with you. Basically everything falls into the 101 class category, and I’ll always do aftercare. However, do you want sexual or non-sexual?

With is graphoerotica? That’s… a term I have never heard of. Uniforms? You’re into uniforms? I… actually have a military uniform; my ex boyfriend gave me one of his. So, we could make that happen. You are so unique, those are three things I have yet to hear.

PM: Yeah, I know, I just wasn’t sure you’d remember or not, sir. I was going to say non-sexual but, oh man, if you’ve got a military uniform, I would very much like it to be not a non-sexual scene.

Graphoerotica is... well, it’s weird, it’s writing on people. It could be so many different things on a practical level, I did a scene with a submissive here earlier and he was bound in my room and I painted on him and then cleaned him up after. There’s something about writing words on people in places they can’t see, imprinting something on their skin, I don’t know how else to describe it. It's just weird.

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So, it would seem scene week is upon us, and I should probably actually get myself some points this time around. It’d be great to actually be able to leave campus, since I’ve been here for like a month.

I am up for sexual scenes with male/masculine identified persons, and non-sexual scenes with submissives of all genders.

The only classes of relevance that I’m taking are Dom 101 and Sensory play, but I am interested in many other things.

My entire scene week is open. So, those interested; I want your name, if I don’t already know it, your class list, your kinks, your limits, and your safeword.

PM: Hey, sir, long time no talk... The name’s Nelson, just in case you forgot and I won’t hold it against you if you did with my disappearing act. I’d be interested in a scene with you, if you want? My classes this semester are Switch 101, D/s History, Aftercare, and Non-Sexual Scenes.

Kinks include graphoerotica, uniforms, and the Victorian Era (I know, it’s weird...) Anti-Kinks are pain, humiliation, bathroom play, and guns. Oh and for my safeword I just use the traffic light system, it’s the easiest.

#ben: text #sorry that took so long :(

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jonesingforben

jonesingforben·:

It’s a little unnerving, but I’m starting to see that, yeah. Who might you be? I’m Bentley Jones, Dominant. Ben is cool if you’re a fellow Dominant but if you’re a Switch or Submissive, Sir will work just fine.

Ah, sorry, name’s Nelson, Nelson Duval, sir. I’ve got the switch mark in our trio. It’s real nice to ‘meet’ you even though it’s through this website and not face-to-face. You settling in okay?

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jonesingforben

jonesingforben·:

One downfall to being stuck on campus is I can’t rely on matching apps for company anymore. I’m going to actually have to be social for once in my life.

It’s pretty horrifying, isn’t it, sir? Though, to be serious, it’s a pretty good crowd here, whenever I venture out to be “social”, I‘m never disappointed.

#ben: text #hai ^_^

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

“What we could have done doesn’t matter,” Nick said, supporting Nelson’s weight easily. He held onto him, needing him to know that Nick wasn’t going anywhere right now. “I think… I think maybe you might want to think about seeing a therapist,” he finally said, slowly. “I actually, um… kind of started seeing someone recently, too. She’s really been helping.”

Nelson groaned quietly at Nick’s suggestion, letting out an annoyed huff that he regretted as soon as his brother admitted to starting seeing one himself. “Shit...” he swore quietly, rubbing at his eyes as he righted himself, still hanging on to Nick’s arm so he wouldn’t let go, “I don’t know, Nicky.... maybe...” he knew he had to do something, leaving wasn’t an option and neither was doing nothing. Doing nothing would lead to more of the same and he didn’t want that.

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

Nick shook Nelson’s shoulders a bit, just enough for him to notice. “You don’t have to keep things like this to yourself!” he admonished as gently as he could. “I love you, Nel. So does Noah. And Mom and Dad. You… you didn’t have to do this alone.” He swallowed, trying to keep his own emotions in check. This wasn’t about him; this was about Nelson. He didn’t understand what he meant about the university letting him back in, but that wasn’t the point right now, either. “I don’t think you really… processed this yet, Nel. Writing a dissertation and sleeping with someone new are very, very different things.”

“I know you do!” Nelson came back with a bit of frustration in his voice. That his family loved him was never a question, “What would it have done?? It’s not like you guys could have dropped everything and come over!? All it would have done is worry you and mom ‘n dad would have wanted me to come back and I didn’t...” he stopped himself and focused on his breathing for a moment, letting Nick’s words really sink in. He was pretty sure he hadn’t processed anything but he didn’t even know what ‘processing’ entailed. How the hell did someone ‘process’ something like this? “I don’t know what to do.” he admitted quietly, head hanging a little lower as he leaned more heavily against Nick.

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

“I’ve got you,” Nick said as firmly as he could manage. He felt tears starting to prick at his eyes and he blinked them away as he held Nelson tightly, rocking them back and forth a bit. “I’m here. You’re here. It’s okay not to be okay yet.” He lapsed into silence, trying to figure out exactly how best to help his brother right now. It wasn’t as if he had a lot of experience comforting people in this situation. “Have you been keeping this inside all this time?” he asked softly.

Holding onto Nick’s arm a little tighter, Nelson leaned in against his older brother and did his best to stop trembling. He didn’t believe Nick that it was okay not to be okay, he should be over this by now, he should have been over it ages ago. Having sex with someone shouldn’t be a big deal. “Yeah... I’m not going to talk about it with strangers, it’s not something that gets brought up in polite company... the university was great, they just let me back in and I kept working on my dissertation and it was fine but then I was done and now I’m here and it’s not fine at all.”

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

nelsonxduval‌:

There was another groan and Nelson was shaking his head as Nick spoke, “No, we didn’t break up! It was going fine, it was amazing and perfect and he… He…” There was a pause, Nelson couldn’t even breathe before he was able to say it, “He died… it-…” He couldn’t continue and just covered his face with his hands hating to have to articulate the truth. It made it far too real. They hadn’t broken up, he hadn’t even been able to say goodbye just one moment things were fine and the next nothing was okay.

Nick continued to rub his hand along Nelson’s back while he replied, but when that word came out, Nick’s hand stopped. It was as if his mind and body completely froze, and he knew immediately that he was in way over his head here. “Nelson,” he breathed out softly, after a few seconds of silence. He wrapped his arms around his brother’s shoulders and hugged him as close as he could while they were sitting side-by-side. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

#sings: para #s:fuck #tw: death

"God dammit..." Nelson swore quietly, feeling the all too familiar tension in his body that he'd become accustomed to the last couple years. He should be okay by now, he should be fine but clearly he wasn't, "I can't do this..." He repeated his previous sentiment, one hand coming up to hold Nick's arm that was around his front. In Paris he had his Masters to dive into to help him deal with - ignore? - Alain's death. Here? Here there seemed to only be reminders of his lover, of what he'd had, and what he would never have again.

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

nelsonxduval‌:

Watching Nick sit on the couch, Nelson waited a few beats before joining him, his mind racing to put the pieces together, what needed to be said before it would be understood why he was upset.. besides everything. Leaning forward to put his elbows on his knees, the switch rubbed at his eyes feeling broken in more ways than one. “Alain is my… he was one of my professors at the university. I never, I don’t know why I didn’t tell you, it never, I mean we didn’t talk much and it was over so…” again his voice broke and Nelson covered his face with groan. He decided to skip the whole dropping out thing for now, it wasn’t relevant to the current situation and he didn’t want to sidetrack things, “He was going to claim me, Nick, he…” Nelson’s throat tightened painfully but there were no tears to help relieve the pressure and he blew out a sharp breath, rubbing at his face to try and keep calm.

Nick was glad that Nelson decided to join him on the couch. It made him feel like they were having more of a conversation than before, and he hoped it meant that Nelson was feeling a little calmer. He sat up and scooted over next to his brother, a gentle hand moving to rub soothingly along his back while he explained what had been going on. His eyes widened in surprise when he heard that Nelson had been having an affair with one of his professors, but he didn’t comment about that. They clearly weren’t together anymore, and that was what was so upsetting to Nelson. “Shh,” he soothed. “I’m sorry things didn’t work out with him. I know how much breakups can hurt. It’s okay if you’re not ready to move on to someone else yet. Don’t feel like you have to have sex with anyone if you’re not ready, yeah?”

#sings: para #s:fuck #mobile #tw: death #sorry its short bby

There was another groan and Nelson was shaking his head as Nick spoke, "No, we didn't break up! It was going fine, it was amazing and perfect and he... He..." There was a pause, Nelson couldn't even breathe before he was able to say it, "He died... it-..." He couldn't continue and just covered his face with his hands hating to have to articulate the truth. It made it far too real. They hadn't broken up, he hadn't even been able to say goodbye just one moment things were fine and the next nothing was okay.

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18

Nick breathed out a sigh of relief when Nelson said that he hadn’t been assaulted. That would have explained why he was so upset, though, so Nick was still pretty lost. “It’s okay,” he said in response to the apology, and he kept his hands in front of his abdomen, not sure what else to do with them now that Nelson had let go. “C’mon, let’s go sit down,” he said gently before moving over to the couch. He sat down and opened his arm up along the back of the couch, giving Nelson space to join him and cuddle up next to him if he wanted. “Who’s Alain?”

Watching Nick sit on the couch, Nelson waited a few beats before joining him, his mind racing to put the pieces together, what needed to be said before it would be understood why he was upset.. besides everything. Leaning forward to put his elbows on his knees, the switch rubbed at his eyes feeling broken in more ways than one. “Alain is my... he was one of my professors at the university. I never, I don’t know why I didn’t tell you, it never, I mean we didn’t talk much and it was over so...” again his voice broke and Nelson covered his face with groan. He decided to skip the whole dropping out thing for now, it wasn’t relevant to the current situation and he didn’t want to sidetrack things, “He was going to claim me, Nick, he...” Nelson’s throat tightened painfully but there were no tears to help relieve the pressure and he blew out a sharp breath, rubbing at his face to try and keep calm.

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Brotherly Love | 11/7/18