Sarcasm in heels

when susan sontag wrote “I must change my life so that I can live it, not wait for it”

What we need to do is convince all the disney adults in america that high speed rail would be a preferable way of getting to disneyworld compared to driving or flying. We could maybe harness their fondness for the monorail or something, but this is a group of people that has time, income, and passion that we could leverage. If we could direct 5% of the enthusiasm they have for limited edition popcorn buckets into calling their representatives and demanding high-speed interstate rail, we could get it by 2030

can y’all believe that fall out boy said “and one day we'll get nostalgic for disaster” and then said “i love you in the same way there's chapel in a hospital” and they’re in the same verse.

Stress having physical effects is so stupid your body's just like "you've been having a real shit time and I'm about to make it worse" I hope you die I hope we both die

For people with anxiety about filing taxes, here’s what things that happen when you make a mistake on your tax return:

- it gets corrected

- you get a letter in the mail either asking for some additional information or a letter showing the adjustment

- you pay the amount (there’s options for payment plans too!) or get a refund

Things that do not happen

- you’re “in trouble”

- you are charged with fraud

- you go to jail

I know that most people are probably just joking/exaggerating when they say a mistake on their return means they get thrown in jail but when I worked with the public I always would encounter people who believed that would happen and they would be panicking about it. So I like to put this out there every year because if I can even prevent one person from feeling that way, it’s worth it

Annual reblog of this important information.  

The thingy above where you sign your tax form says that you’ve filled it out to the best of your ability.  “Sir, I am a dumbass” is 100% a valid defense

can y’all believe that fall out boy said “and one day we'll get nostalgic for disaster” and then said “i love you in the same way there's chapel in a hospital” and they’re in the same verse.

That cat is absolutely an orphan-generating coal baron. The mustache and top-hat are there in spirit, if not actually.

im so ready for the next phase of my life

we were so right when we invented the concept of friendship bracelets and wedding bands and the like. just matchy stuff in general. to feel this piece of jewelry on your skin and to fidget with it, a physical reminder of your connection with this other person who’s so important to you. to know they’re also wearing the other half of the pair, or group of 3 or more, because they love you too…

Me want to write. Me don't want to type. Me want scene in head implanted into word document.

ohh you misheard! im a paranormal INSTIGATOR. im here to CAUSE hauntings lol

all video games should be dressup games. if you can’t put your guy in a little outfit what’s the point