my dealer: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called “public transit” 😳💊 you’ll be going wherever you want for an affordable price 💯👨💻
me: yeah whatever i dont feel shit
5 min later: dude i swear the bus should have been here by now
random guy at the bus stop with me: the transit app is lying to us
Some people are taking "Nobody in history has died of a THC overdose" as a challenge.
Love the people in the notes like "this would fix me" bestie this thing would dissolve your brain into a fine mist. You would discover the kind of mental illnesses Freud could only dream of. Forget meeting the Hat Man this is what turns you into the Hat Man. This is worse than that torture drug that makes you expirience 600 billion years in a second. This is the secret to honest to god shifting. The fucking MK-ULTRA era CIA would tell you to dial it back if you showed them this thing. This is the closest humans have ever come to making a physical manifestation of a bad idea. The only thing this is fixing is fixing to turn you inside out.
String identified:
t t tt : g tat
a tag " t a a TC " a a cag.
t t t "t " t t tg a t a t. c t ta c a . gt tg t at a t at t t t at a. T ta tat tt g tat a c 600 a a c. T t ct t t t g tg. T cg -TA a CA t t a t ac t t tg. T t ct a a c t ag a ca atat a a a. T tg t g g t t t.
Closest match: Furcifer pardalis isolate Fpa_1 chromosome 9 Common name: Panther chameleon
This is what eating that whole gummy would turn you into
realizing that sticking to the "do it bad" "do it scared" mentality implies theres also a "do it bored"
well. did it bored 👍
DO IT SCARED. DO IT BAD. DO IT BORED. DO IT HALFWAY. DO IT WRONG. DO IT EMBARRASSED. DO IT UGLY. DO IT LATE. DO IT DIFFERENT. but by god do it <3!!
🔹 Someone else's fiction cannot cause you physical harm.
🔹If someone else's fiction is causing you emotional or psychological harm, or distress, you can put it down and not read/watch it.
🔹Your emotional well-being is not the responsibility of fiction writers.
🔹Someone else's fiction is not about your personal trauma.
🔹When reading or watching fiction, you always have the power. You can always stop. You are never reading fiction without your own consent.
🔹Fiction writers are not responsible for other people's mental health.
🔹The content of a piece of fiction does not reflect on the morality of its author.
🔹Just because someone writes about bad things happening, doesn't mean they want those things to happen.
🔹Don't like? Don't read.
-a writer's only job is to tell their story. they have no responsibility to you for how it makes you feel. you chose to consume the story. so those are your feelings that you need to take ownership of.
-discomfort is not the same as harm and acclimating yourself via fiction to strongly unpleasant emotions such as sorrow, indignation, and disgust will make you stronger and healthier
-however if you are repeatedly triggering yourself by engaging with media that makes you miserable you should probably recognize that it's up to you to stop hurting yourself
Cats Being Cats
i cant believe people dont like cats…
The chair bit him. So, he bit back.
heard it was aliem day some older studies from 22 and 21 respectively
bought a beautiful and fairly obscure book. i will show you. soon.
character design by florian satzinger.
Ghost type Espeon maybe?
what is even happening
aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall
Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.
Well unless the mall is his native territory I think I'm fine, I wasn't planning on smiling at him
This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.
Misguided! I would much rather have a mallmate I can easily see and hear coming. I'm confident I can stay out of the gorilla's way, but if I step on a snake or one otherwise gets the jump on me, it's all over.
It's not just about the physical danger either, it's about my mental health. One gorilla, unless he's actively mad at me, I just keep a healthy distance between us and make sure I never get trapped. With the snakes, it requires a lot more constant vigilance
They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.
if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes
Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.
Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.
this is too good to leave hidden in the replies
fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard
Lmao how is this real, "the ambient sounds of the world were wrong, sir"
Imagine paying Columbia-amounts of money to be taught by someone with kindergarten-level art literacy. Like, motherfucker, the wholeass point of 4’33” is to emphasize how every performance of live music is inextricably linked to the ambient sounds of the context in which it is performed!!!!!!! Paying attention to and thinking about the context of the performance is the point of the song!!!! If the point was to hear birds chirping and people walking, John Cage would have fucking recorded that instead. Insisting that art is only good when contains good things and makes you feel good things is baby-level art criticism. How the fuck is this dude a professor.
Actually I’m not done going off yet. This pisses me off so much. How can you teach the humanities and be so obstinately ignorant? Like bruh, if the chanting outside makes you feel uncomfortable and upset, maybe you should take about four and a half minutes to contemplate why you feel that way. During that time, you might consider things such as: why are there students chanting? What are they protesting? Why do they feel so strongly about this issue that they’re willing to disrupt their lives to bring attention to it? Should I also feel as strongly? Should I be protesting with them? Is my desire for silence more important than the students’ desire for justice? Why do I find the noise they’re making more upsetting than the genocide they’re protesting?
Being like “loud noise make me angy 😠” is so fundamentally incurious and baby-brained it’s honestly unbelievable
dadchuck is everything to me
i love everything about this troll stuff though
"i'm literally looking at one right now dude"
(via @rlyehtaxidermist)
this guy's impact is so amazing
interesting fact i have titanium in my spine
Titanium not only is crazy durable, but it noo magnet! Thas wy Dock chok jjiun spi; surgyr ad pater noster, qui es in cœlis; sanctificetur nomen tuum: Adveniat regnum tuum; fiat voluntas tua, sicut in cœlo, et in terra. Panem nostrum cotidianum da nobis hodie: Et dimitte nobis debita nostra, sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris: et ne nos inducas in tentationem: sed libera nos a malo.
dude got hit with the ol’ Lorum Ipsem beam😞
Fun fact! Titanium is often used for medical implants because it's *dodges lorem ipsum beam* because it's strong, nontoxic, won't corrode inside the body, and best of all, *dodges* bone will directly grow onto it! This is called "osseointegration" and it means that your titanium artificial hip, dental implant, or whatever will have greater *dodges* greater mechanical stability and will ARRRGGH! aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit!
