;;I haven’t been online in so long…been busy and just not feeling this muse anymore…at all…I’m sorry

;;May or may not keep this blog. I know I said I was staying but playing Eren just doesn’t feel right. I don’t feel him as my muse anymore. And it’s getting harder to balance college and multiple blogs. I hope you all understand if I leave again.

the question sends chills to levi’s bones and he glances across to eren with an indifferent expression. that mission had a lot of impact on levi’s life, not seeing erwin around anymore. not having the security blanket that was their commander.

yet, he thought, as he closed his eyes and tilted his head up; “it was the right thing to do.” levi had said it before, erwin had wanted peace. he had needed peace. armin was still young and the three of them together brought back memories of himself when he was younger. fighting to survive. a loss to such a tight group would have had more impact then the loss of a commander too, he reasonded. they needed eren to be fit, and mikasa was also too valuable to lose. armin had a smart brain too, one he could grow into.

| It didn’t feel like Levi really meant those words. But then again, it was hard to know what Levi meant. Ever. With concern, Eren looks to him, frowning some before he looks away. No, he wouldn’t question it, that might just provoke anger. Besides, it wasn’t in his place to question him.

“If you say so, sir,” he replies with a curt nod. From there, he’s uncharacteristically quiet, staring ahead with an empty expression as he thinks back on that day. No doubt he would’ve made the same choice every time, but he knew it was selfish. He always had-- and this is where the slight bit of shame lied. |

+8

the-hunter-eren:

The Captain holds his gaze ahead, taking in the words his soldier spares and nodding once when he’s done. Of course, Eren’s behavior hasn’t gone by unnoticed; Levi’s been brushing it off for awhile now. But perhaps a part of him knew the boy would tell him eventually, in his own time - if he felt it was the right thing to do. 

“Life’s hard,” Levi says, finally. His eyes landing on the other after a blink but his head barely turns. Though he can admit, Eren’s is much harder than most and he can feel for the kid, he really can. It’s not fair the amount of pressure that’s been put upon and continues to be pushed on him. “It’s really shit, sometimes.” But what can be done about it? Levi’s a fighter, he’s fierce when faced with a greater struggle. So it might be unhelpful but he finds himself saying, “So you’re just going to let it take you down from inside-out, are you?” 

| His final comment bites Eren in a way that makes his blood run cold. Levi made it sound as though he were giving up-- was he? Eren really wasn’t the type, and yet he wasn’t so stupid to not realize the odds were really stacked against him. 

But the comment stung, and he feels a heat in the pit of his stomach, one that hadn’t been there in some time. It was the same sort of feeling he got when he closed the hole in Wall Rose, or when he took on Annie. That feeling of determination.

“No--” he says, almost a little too sharply. “I’m not doing that-- no. I just...” He was conflicted. No way in hell did he just want to give up, and yet what could he do? That was the hardest thing. At this point, there was no answer, he had no control, and it scared the shit out of him. “I don’t....really know what to do about any of it.” |

MY MUSE IS NOT ALWAYS RIGHT

   Please keep in mind that, however hard my muse may argue something or however confidently they make a statement, they can be wrong. It’s my muse’s opinion, and my muse talking, and their perception is skewed.               Do not feel like everything out of my character’s mouth is the truth, or that I’m godmodding. 

ask/rules

;;Hey, new RP player on the block (sorta, this is technically a remake). Mugen from Samurai Champloo! Open to crossovers and AUs and what not~ Please reblog if you’d like to rp!!

;;Hey, new RP player on the block (sorta, this is technically a remake). Mugen from Samurai Champloo! Open to crossovers and AUs and what not~ Please reblog if you’d like to rp!!

+8

the-hunter-eren:

“I see.” But those memories, Levi doesn’t understand those, of course, he only knows so much from what he’s been told and even then the details are vague. It’s not as though he expects to be able to help the boy with the problem he’s having, whether he says it’s a big deal or not, as the Captain is no miracle worker. Bad dreams are common among the lot of them and sleep can be hard to come by. 

But who knows, perhaps it will ease him to have somewhere to voice these concerns, for the time being. So he asks the boy again, giving way to the chance should he wish to take it, “Are you sure it’s not a big deal?” And then, “I’d rather not have my soldiers spacing out whenever they seem to please.” 

| In slight shame, he grits his teeth and slumps a bit, Levi’s last comment biting him slightly. It wasn’t like he was doing it on purpose, but it wasn’t like he was exactly doing too much to help himself-- after all, it wasn’t like he even knew what to do about it. These things just happened, and he didn’t know how to stop it, though there’s some pride in the fact that he thinks he’s getting a bit better about it.

“It’s just hard,” he admits, unable to look Levi in the face. “It’s hard having your head filled with someone else’s memories, someone else’s thoughts. It makes it hard to keep track of your own. And then...there’s that curse of Ymir thing. It’s not exactly comforting t’ know you’re gonna die in a few years.” | 

the-hunter-eren:

{~⚔~}      “Your room. It’s where you want to go, is it not?” 

  Levi rose a brow at the young man, crossing his arms over his chest once more as he starts to walk further down the hall but keeps am eye on the young man. Hoping he doesn’t lose the boy to anymore memories and he starts to wander again. His mind asking just how long Eren is going to suffer from this before the memories die down and he is able to think for himself and stop wandering around like he is lost.

                      The vacant look in his eyes is something that heavily concerns him. 

      “Of course  I can take you to Hanji as well, see if she can possibly help with your thoughts wondering as they do.”

  He leans his head to look at the other boy once more, trying to keep the concerned expression off his face. Though he is, the trio has been through hell and back so far. Even almost losing Armin to the battle…though they all lost something that day…something and someone…taking a deep breathe, Levi stops in front of the others room before turning back to Eren. 

      “I can have some tea prepared for you, it might help you focus.” 

| His room, of course. Now he felt like an idiot, and the slump in his shoulders and expression on his face made that clear. Why couldn’t he get his head together? Everything felt like one big mess in there. 

“No-- Hanji’s real busy now, being the new commander ‘n all. I’d rather not bother her if I can help it.” Maybe he just needed some more sleep and more focus. That wouldn’t be so hard, would it? He didn’t want to think so, anyways.

His gaze meets Levi, and he stiffens a bit, curious as to what his captain was going to say next. The offer brings a polite smile to his face.

“Yeah that sounds good, actually, if you’re willing to share, that is. I know tea can get expensive.” |

“Just a handful of times I’ve seen him around, mainly during lunch breaks. I normally work in the insects section, but on rare occasions I do see other sections.” Usually for seeing higher-ups or if a visitor asked where something was, Hanji recalled. It wasn’t because the rest of the Institute was boring or anything. It was because by the time work was over, she was too tired to do anything but go home.

“Well, I’ll keep an eye out during lunch from now on for him. Hope he doesn’t find me just coming over to him too weird.”

| “He might-- but it can’t be any weirder than anything I’ve done around him,” Eren laughs. “I’m sure as kids, Armin thought I was from another planet. I’ve never exactly been the conforming type.” It had always put such a strain on his poor mother. Eren just always did whatever he wanted, when he wanted.

“...So here we are, and if you’re worried about people stepping on bugs or whatever, there’s some trails that not many go on. Just be careful, some people say that’s where the weirdos hide, ya know?”