Inbox me if you’ve got something to say
Since I started the recruitment process I’ve been told “don’t tell people what you do” so that I don’t become a “target”. To which I say “FUCK YOU.” I am a police officer. I am black. I am a female. If you’ve got something to say, say it. I was holding onto this all week and it came out in the worst kind of way, so I want EVERYONE to know what’s really going on in my POV.
I was in uniform on Saturday night in downtown Silver Spring *because first responders are essential and don’t stay home during the Coronavirus pandemic, despite the county deciding that virus exposure isn’t worth hazard pay or even a COLA adjustment * and a black couple walked past my cruiser…and spit on it. I was sitting in it. Enraged, I popped out of my car for the obligatory WTF… and I proceeded to get screamed at about “how dare I wear that uniform” and how I was a “race traitor” and that I’m “what’s wrong with black America”. No. I’m not. I wear this uniform proudly and will continue to do so because I love my job. I want to protect and serve actively, not just write letters, sign petitions and give stupid Facebook likes.
Fact: My older brother was murdered. My uncle was murdered. Neither of them were murdered by cops. Where’s the “no justice, no peace” for black men murdered by other blacks? What about the BLACK officers injured trying to maintain peace during the riots? Black Lives Matter? Bullshit. If they really matter, let’s stop killing each other first before we start looking at others to do right. I’ve legitimately faced more racism and prejudice from people of color than ANY other race. I was “acting white” because I had white friends. My boyfriend wasn’t black so, “she doesn’t know any better”. This “redbone bitch thinks she’s something”. Sorry not sorry, I have no pity for those who want to whine about racism now. Get your shit together before you start looking at others to do right.
I had a legit breakdown on Monday night, I couldn’t take it anymore. I REFUSE to choose sides. I am Blue because I trust my badge brothers and sisters with my LIFE. I am Black because that is the skin color I was born with and we have a rich and powerful history and an amazing future to come. I was struggling to breathe on Monday night because I was sobbing my motherfucking heart out. If black lives matter, why doesn’t mine matter? Why am I a target because of the missteps of someone HUNDREDS of miles away?
Please…can we all just be ONE HUMAN RACE and stop this shit?