Hi guys. Remember me? 

...Nah. :P

I’ve been away for a loooooong time, feel free to send me asks about where I’ve been, what I’ve been doing, what I’m gonna do about this hurricane, anything! 

I can’t believe that thing got 44 notes I hadn’t written in months lol

[ncis: la] closing time

Semi-AU. Mexico happened, but Deeks left NCIS after to focus on the bar. Sorry for not cutting, posting from mobile tumblr.

———

She likes to watch him.

He’s cleaning up after the doors have shut for the night, his sleeves rolled up just past his elbows as he wipes down the bar, another successful evening in the books. It’s been only a couple of months, but both of them shared the surprise at how well his bar venture had taken off. Deeks has already built quite the regular clientele, a mix of surfer types, old buddies from LAPD, and more than the occasional pretty girl.

Kensi doesn’t mind the latter; he only has eyes for one pretty girl.

She nurses her martini, gazing at him over the top of her glass. It’s not her favorite, but she likes to order something different every night, just to keep Deeks on his toes. After all, he wanted to play bartender, and Kensi is anything but the predictable “I’ll have the usual” kind of person.

As she watches him, Kensi can tell there’s something on his mind. She can tell by the stiffness in his body as he moves about the bar; she can sense it on him. He can be guarded when he wants, but right now he’s an open book to her.

It doesn’t take long before he clues her in to what’s bothering him (though she’d had an idea already). “I hear you had an interesting day,” he drawls, situating the bottles along the back of the wall. “And by interesting, I mean dangerous.”

Kensi fights back the urge to roll her eyes. There’s no anger, no annoyance in Deeks’ voice though; it’s a simple fact he’s stating. “No more than usual,” she answers with a nonchalant shrug.

“Sam said you had a gun at your head today.”

Kensi bristles. “It wasn’t pressed to my head,” she protests. “And you need to stop making Sam report back to you.”

When Deeks replies, Kensi can’t help but admit that it’s true - Sam’s always been like a protective older brother. “He’d still do it anyway.”

“Doesn’t mean he has to.” There are some things that happen in the field that Kensi admittedly would rather Deeks not find out about, given the fights they’ve had over the job. Of course it’s a dangerous line of work; of course sometimes Kensi finds herself in a dicey situation, like today. She knows Deeks is going to worry regardless; she’d just rather he worry less than he does.

“You know I just want you safe,” Deeks says, a twinge of pain apparent in his voice. “I knew it would be hard, but I just didn’t realize how hard it’d be to trust you to another partner.”

“You can always come back,” Kensi replies softly. She’s caught in the middle though - part of her wishes he would come back, but the other part is relieved he’s safely out of the field.

“I know.”

She can’t resist. “Do you miss it?”

Deeks bites the inside of his jaw, lost in his thoughts for a moment. “Sometimes,” he admits. “Mostly I miss spending all day every day with you.”

Heat tickles her cheeks, and Kensi ducks her head, taking another sip of her drink. She’d be lying if she tried to say she didn’t miss that too.

The subject is still a bit of a sore spot for both of them - hell, it had briefly ended their relationship. He was done; she couldn’t quite walk away, so she’d walked away from him instead. But the events of Mexico had made her realize on a deeper level what she’d already realized - she can’t live without him. She needs him, and a life without him would be meaningless.

She’s sure he still harbors a bit of resentment at her choice to stay in the game, but he hadn’t fought her over it - his only stipulation was that she still marry him. Lying there in his hospital bed, he’d re-proposed to her, getting the last word after all.

His nightly cleaning complete, Deeks studies the line of bottles behind the bar before wrapping his fingers around the neck of one. Deftly he pours a bit into a glass, gently swirling the dark liquid as he joins Kensi across the bar. “Your mom stopped by today,” he says, changing the subject. “I think she’s getting a bit antsy; she wanted to know if we had a date yet.”

“Why is my mom asking you?”

“Because she gets free wine here?” Deeks grins. “We actually chatted for about an hour, about lots of things. When you’re going to pick your dress, who your bridesmaids are, when the bridal shower is, what kind of cake we’re going with…”

His grin widens. “She’s so excited that she was practically bouncing on her barstool.”

Kensi chuckles, shaking her head. “Well next time, tell her to chill out because we haven’t even figured all that out yet.”

“She can’t help it - her only daughter is getting married to the most charming man in all of LA.” His smile stretches from ear to ear. “It’s adorable.”

Kensi shakes her head slightly. “You know, there’s so much to do, I don’t even know where to start,” she admits, furrowing her brow.

Deeks reaches across, gently touching her hand. “Well, the beauty of it is that we don’t have to figure it all out in one night. Besides, that’s why you delegate some of it - to your mom, to my mom, to your friends. I know Kat is dying to plan your bridal shower.”

“You talk to her too?”

Deeks smirks. “She gets free mojitos.”

“You know, if you give away free drinks to everyone, you’re going to lose money instead of making it.”

Deeks cocks his head toward the glass in front of her. “Okay. Pay up, then,” he teases.

Kensi snorts. “Yeah right. For putting up with you, my drinks are free for life.”

He just laughs. There’s silence for a moment as he empties his glass, setting it back atop the bar. “What do you say we get out of here?” He suggests, coming around to Kensi’s side of the bar. “It’s way past closing time, after all.”

She grins. “Are you trying to pick up a girl at the bar?” She asks, fluttering her lashes.

Deeks extends a hand to her, helping her down from her barstool. “I’m picking up my girl at the bar,” he replies smoothly.

Damn, if the way he says that doesn’t drive shivers down Kensi’s spine. “Where do you suggest we go?”

He smirks. “I know a place.”

@divergent338 tagged me years ago to post ten songs I’m listening to and I answered but now I have new songs so (The only order is the order added to my “krayzee jess experience” playlist) 1. “Suburbia Blue” - Future Jr 2. “Alien” - Cary Brothers 3. “City of Angels” - Thirty Seconds to Mars (piano version) 4. “If You Were Mine” - Ocean Park Standoff 5. “Almost Love” - Sabrina Carpenter 6. “Sober” - Demi Lovato 7. “Youngblood” - 5SOS 8. “Hometown” - Twenty One Pilots 9. “Bandito” - Twenty One Pilots 10. “Neon Gravestones” - Twenty One Pilots

sometimes I wonder about the handful of friends I lost whilst in the deepest most selfish depths of my depression, some of my closest friends sometimes I wonder if they remember me i’d love to say to all of them that i’m better now. i am becoming okay.

It has been WAY WAY TOO LONG since I’ve had this much fic fodder fluttering around in my head.

Hannah Jo/Hanban/Mi Hanita/Hanrietta Lange/ @divergent338 tagged me in a thing yaaaaaay!!!! I’m supposed to list ten songs I’m listening to and tag ten humans but I’ll just list the songs because I’m so inactive no one follows me 😂😂😂😂 In order of favorites (though 1 and 2 keep flip-flopping) 1: “Spirit Cold” - Tall Heights 2: “Always” - Panama 3: “Start a Riot” - BANNERS 4: “Roses on a Breeze” - Bear’s Den 5: “Cecilia and the Satellite” - Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness 6: “Kings and Queens and Vagabonds” - Ellem 7: “These Are Some of the Things That I Think About” - De Lux 8: “Holy Ground” - BANNERS 9: “Don’t Let Me Go” - Bandit Heart 10: “Peasants” - Houses

how dare my muse wake up and interrupt my Camila Cabello time with seedlings of fic

"Protected and together for eternity."

But no seriously remember that time Deeks got cactus in his ass

"Wow, looks like your house...after you clean it."