what yall know about cowboy Wyll
if you're transgender you have to live.
please. I love you.
Patreon, Squarespace, Gumroad. What do all these online spaces have in common? A monopolizing payment processor. My hand slipped and I contacted the ACLU, the FSC, and the MA Bar Association for legal assistance. If you’ve been fucked over by draconian nsfw bans please join my Mastercard Injury Mailing List.
BTW folks who read/look at/enjoy/consume adult content should fill this out too! Not just artists and writers! You too have been negatively impacted when adult creators have to close shop!
Hey guys, just putting out a PSA because now that's THREE people I know of who've got these identical messages on Discord last night alone.
If a friend messages you apologising because someone "with a similar username to you" tried to deceive them so they reported your account as hacked, and sends an image of a discord email, your friend is the one who has been hacked.
It's hard to read in the screenshot (sorry!) but it looks like the "advice" is something like "file a friend request with our CORPORATE HEAD OF SECURITY to open your case. You have 12 hours to do so or we might suspend your account."
I've been told that if you do contact that user, they try to get you to "prove" you own the account by making a "100% refundable transaction" to them. Which is so scummy.
Scammers catch people out by imposing a time limit and dramatic consequences of not acting fast enough. In that moment of panic, you might not figure out it's suspicious, especially when the email looks so real (it will have your screen-name in it to make it seem legit, but the request code will likely be identical to the one in this post, #40557035) and you're worried about both an impersonator AND losing your account.
If you get sent the above message, try to let your friend know through other ways (socials, etc) that they've been hacked. If you are ever worried, your best bet is to check Discord's website and ask for help through their support page, which has a section for hacked accounts.
some people in one of my circles almost got scammed by this No Text To Speech on Youtube has some great information on this and other Discord scams that have been going around exercise caution and if you are getting link from somebody to do something critical and account-related, be very wary
Let’s work on communicating our insecurities and feelings instead of accusing our loved ones. Making accusations can damage our relationships and isn’t fair to our loved ones.
Try saying “I’m scared I’m going to be alone” instead of “you’re going to leave me like everyone else”.
Try saying “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. I feel bad about it. Is there anything I can do to help make this better?” instead of “I’m such a failure and a bad person. You shouldn’t be friends with me anymore.”
Try saying “I’m feeling really alone lately. Can we talk more?” instead of “you never talk to me. You must not care about me.”
Our loved ones can’t read our minds. No matter how obvious it might seem to us that we’re struggling, it isn’t necessarily obvious to them. And there are any number of reasons that they might not notice, or might notice and not react (such as trying to respect that they think you don’t want to talk about it and will come to them when you’re ready.)
Your feelings are valid. Your insecurities are valid. But it’s better to deal with these by seeking reassurance in healthy ways or coping mechanisms like self-soothing instead of accusing those you love of bad intentions.
I got an ask about this and here’s a post I wrote about seeking reassurance in a healthy way.
And sometimes we can’t let go of the bad feelings in the second statements. And that’s okay. It’s okay to talk about them with the person to resolve them. But please do it in a healthy way like the examples in my longer seeking reassurance post and not in an accusing way.
Excerpts from Barbie: The World Tour by Andrew Mukamal and Margot Robbie
"anybody got a match?... give me that"
Reblog to kill it faster
This is to good to get buried in the tags
i am once again sad about the polyamory options in baldurs gate being as limited as they are
growing up as a cis girl the patriarchy told me “you’re a girl because of the way you were born, there is nothing you can do about this, you have no say in your gender” and i hated being a girl because it wasn’t my choice it was a prison and the trans community told me “you’re a girl because you say so, your view of yourself is the most important thing, if you change your mind that would be ok” and it made me proud to be a girl and feel empowered in my gender and i wasn’t trapped anymore and then terfs come along and tell me “you’re a girl because of the way you were born, there is nothing you can do about this, you have no say in your gender (but like in a woke way)” and they somehow expect me to be on their side?
if you respond with some terf shit im blocking you lmao
I’m so happy someone wrote this because I feel the same was as a cis girl. I felt pressured to be feminine and went full nlog because I felt too ugly and fat to be “feminine” and I was in an academic setting where it’s a nono. Then the trans community was so proud of their femininity it made me feel gratitude for being born a woman. Trans youtubers empowered me to buy my first skirts and dresses and I no longer felt “stupid” for doing it. I took another colleague that felt “stupid” for being feminine dress-shopping once and we’ve been friends ever since and she now dresses up all the time and tries to feel cute and feminine and I’m so happy to see her like that. The trans community destigmatized being feminine for cis women more than any girlboss feminism I’ve seen and we owe it to trans women.
A trans woman was the one to make me realize I was a trans man. I’d always thought all girls hated being girls, that being born female was a terrible curse we all just had to endure. And then I met a trans women who was so, so fucking excited to be able to wear skirts and cute tops and makeup at last, after years of fighting for the right to get on HRT. I saw the pure joy she felt as she did a little twirl in a skirt and I realised being female isn’t bad. It’s not bad at all. I’m just not female. And I can experience that joy, too. And then I got my HRT and my voice dropped and I got hairy and I learned what it was to be happy with your gender. It took seeing a joyful trans woman twirling in a skirt for that to happen for me.
Thank you trans women.
I feel like this also might be relevant.
I’m trans but there is a special joy I experience when cis people experience what gender euphoria feels like, how fun it is to adjust your expession even if you identify with the gender you were assigned at birth. Cis people unlocking gender+ is so good because it shows how the trans experience can enrich lives and just… spread joy and happiness <3. Stuff like this makes me happy
And in a great mobius double reacharound in return cis people dressing/expressing themselves by not confirming to gender stereotypes also helps trans people who can’t pass or don’t want to including butch/masc trans lesbians and femme/girly trans men <3
[ID: A screenshot of a twitter thread by @/JoCat105 which reads: “the understanding of “trans people don’t need to ‘pass’ to be considered the gender they are” made me realize that wait a minute if trans people don’t need to pass, cis people don’t either right? and that has helped me explore myself so much without fear of not being a “real” man
i guess what I’m saying is kind of thank you for all the trans folks who encourage being who you are in spite of what society tells you. I know it’s not the same with cis people, but it’s at least helped me feel more comfortable in my own skin. yall are good role models” /End ID]
It makes me deeply sad when cis people put their resentment at their own gender onto trans people who experience euphoria for having the same gender. I love getting to see cis people doing the exact opposite of that. I think everyone benefits from examining their gender and finding what makes them euphoric, from realizing there are no rules and seeing that not as a destruction of their experiences but as an oppurtunity to construct a more healthy self conception. If being a woman doesnt require resenting being a woman, is that not permission to free yourself from the resentment, a freedom to love yourself and your gender with reckless abandon? I hope more cis people can learn this lesson. I know its one I have imparted to people in my life, and benefitted from when I received it.
I cannot begin to express how beneficial it has been to my comfort and happiness in my own gender to know and speak to and see and hear and be in the presence of trans people.
Nobody showed me how to love or enjoy my masculinity until trans men did. I didn’t even know that “enjoying” it was an option! *gestures at gender* You mean this fucking thing is more than just a set of imposed requirements I get to feel bad about failing to live up to? I didn’t realize until later how fucking lonely it had felt to be a man who had been assigned his gender without being taught how to think about it.
I owe a debt of gratitude to trans people, to trans writers, to trans artists and activists, because their experiences helped me finally see myself as a man for more than just the amino acid accidents in my cells.
Trans people and trans thought has helped liberate me from oppression in my own gender, I don’t know a world where I don’t have a moral duty to push for their liberation in kind.
I think the best way to fight this AI shit is just to support actual creators. The cat's out of the bag with AI; our data's going to be taken and used without our consent whether we like it or not, so maybe we should put efforts into holding up those who create their own stuff. Comment/interact on people's writings and art. Make it worth them posting; make it clear that what the people are interested in isn't generated stuff, but things that people have actually done themselves. It's a drop in the ocean, but showing creators that it's them that deserve the support at least serves to cut off a tiny bit of oxygen to these AI hogs - and make a difference to creatives who are trying against hope to share with a community.
The thing is, until you get past the mindset of "justice=punishment" you will never be able to create lasting change. We have actual proof that punitive justice creates more crime and makes criminals more violent. We have actual proof that rehabilitation reduces crime and recidivism. But some of y'all are so stuck on this idea that the wrongdoer must be punished for justice to be done that you will choose sating your need for revenge over actually moving toward a better world every time. And that's sad!
Everyone in the notes saying punishment doesn't undo the bad thing: exactly! Punishment does not create or preserve healing, prevention, protection, fairness, or goodness. The only thing punishment does is satisfy a sadistic public desire for revenge and give us the illusion of control.
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