t4t teplí mravenci???

Můžete přestat hledat český ekvivalent "it is what is is" byl mi právě teď vyjeven mým chábrem Honzíkem.

Honzíkovi je něco mezi 2-4 lety a dneska vyprávěl, jak spadnul z kola, odřel se a krvácelo mu to. Načež s bohorovným klidem zahlásil "To tak někdy je."

@obrozujici-premyslovec je mi svědkem

sherlock holmes deduces you are trans before you've figured it out yourself and refers to you with those pronouns and then when you look confused is like "ah...had you not arrived at that conclusion yet?" and wafts away in his dressing gown to smoke seventeen pipes, leaving you in a gender crisis

Hercule Poirot deduces you are trans by accident because he suspected you of murder and broke into your house and searched your stuff then puts 2 and 2 together when Hastings makes an innocuous observation about your fashion sense or something and he jumps up and cries “mon dieu!!!” before striding over to you kissing you on both cheeks and saying “ah, cher ami, you must live as you choose!” and then running off to confront the real culprit while you stand there in befuddlement

Columbo deduces you're trans from context clues while he's talking to you about the area, immediately uses your preferred pronouns and starts telling you about his cousin, who's also transgender, and how they got this job doing security, and how they told him that a security guard always locks up, and asks you if the guard locked up last night, and isn't it weird the place was open? And you're like, well, someone else must have opened it up. Maybe the guy in charge? He has a spare key. And then he nods and goes "the guy in charge has a spare key... well, how about that?" And then he offers you a cigar and wanders off, and a day later your boss gets arrested for murder.

All of these. All of these.

he would not say that.

I was there when he said it actually

"oh yeah even if your opponent has an unexpected advantage that completely turns the tides of battle (you thought they were unarmed when they aren't) you shook totally just keep going with your current plan, otherwise you're a coward"

he would not say that.

you're just afraid of a big thick girlcock

Whether Sun Tzu would be into girldick is completely orthogonal to whether he would give bullshit bravado advice that will get you killed. He's the "logistics win wars" guy.

His ladycock advice would be more like "The wise general chooses an adversary who uses familiar techniques."

two sheep. standing still

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

i need all the help i can get for finals

Hey so

the last time I reblogged this post right before I got a great job, in a permanent work-from-home position, with benefits, retirement, and a salary literally 3x what I was making before, doing something I really like. 

So you know. 

This might be the real one, y’all.

At this point literally anything helps.

For my upcoming mid terms, semi finals and finals. Please.

Eh fuck it let’s do this not like i’m gonna lose anything anyways

Guys I won first place in a singing competition :0

Actually the portrait of Charles is red to represent enthusiasm, energy, determination, passion, strength, leadership, and love. It doesn't matter that it looks like he's walking through fountains of blood spilled by the British empire! Some of you people need to learn color theory

i was WAITING for this post

tumblr coming across the painting:

not to be crude but the people who think Laios is one of those fandom characters that doesnt know what sex is are completely missing like. his whole deal. you think the dude who obsessively studies monster anatomy and behaviors doesn't know what sex is? you think he hasn't memorized the mating rituals of every single goddamn beast under the sun? you think he doesn't have an encyclopedic knowledge on how to fuck? thats his goddamn special interest brother. he knows sex better than anyone on the goddamn planet.

he knows exactly, in excruciating detail, what sex is. he does not know what flirting is.

being on the internet

I just had to

madoka rewatch

fish for mermay lightly inspired by sku's leviathantale

The final stage of every OC's creation is having to go through websites like this to name it:

I’ve never been a real star wars fan but the phantom menace came out when I was 6 and my older brother was 8 so we were absolutely among the target audience and we had toy light sabers & we spent a lot of time playing star wars but my brothers were anakin and obi wan etc. and my best friend was padmé which meant i had to come up with a star wars oc and since my brother was anakin i decided okay. i would be anakin’s sister.

i made up a backstory that i was his twin sister who also lived on tatooine and i also had latent force potential but qui gon and obi wan didn’t even try to meet me even when anakin mentioned me and they left me behind.

this was an utter betrayal to me obviously, like my brother got rescued and i got abandoned and i could have been him and i should have been him. i should’ve been at his side. i should have gotten training and all else. i should have been a jedi too.

but they didn’t even care to meet me. so i had this intense grudge against the jedi and i ended up developing my skills myself and then i grew up and got myself off tattooine and set out on a mission as a rogue force user to kill obi wan.

and 6 year old me really embodied that role. she felt that. so when I was like 25 & rewatched the original star wars trilogy for the first time since childhood, when obi wan came on I was like ugh. I hate that guy. and my friend was like “WHY?”

and I thought about it and realized it wasn’t actually his character. I was remembering my childhood self insert oc beef.

Like, sorry you wouldn’t get it but obi wan and I have history.

best part of the games was the reveal that anakin turned out evil because I was like. you idiots. I wouldn’t have turned out evil. you took the wrong twin. but i’m evil now. congratulations now you have two evil siblings. stupid ass.

if you don’t support pebbles the lesbian budgie and her giant wife dni