How I want people to react when I say I’m asexual:

Ways people actually react (quotation marks indicate exact wording):

Bonus! When one acquaintance found out I liked girls, he said “Thank god! I thought you were a fucking asexual.”

“so basically you have no emotions at all”

“so you’re a tumblr user then, okay”

“that’s not a thing” “you’ll change your mind one day” “you just haven’t met the right person” “ha ha so you reproduce by budding? i am literally the first person ever to say this, i’m hilarious”

heres some flowers for my nonbinary lesbians! 🌷 🌸 🌹 🌺 🌻

heres some snacks for my nonbinary gays!  🍧 🍨 🍩 🍪 🍫

heres some love for my nonbinary bi/pans!  💕 💜 💞 💙 💗

heres some cute animals for my nonbinary aces!  🐇 🐎 🐕 🐱 🐸

you’re all so wonderful and valid in your gender / orientations !! please never forget you’re loved and wanted by your friends / partners.

you can tell a lot about someone based on their phone background. it shows what’s most important to them

Reblog this and put what your phone background in the tags

all clothes are unisex if you stop giving a shit

As much as I enjoy the jokes about aspec confusion in the face of things like sex, romance, and just relationships overall, I can’t help but worry that these jokes are isolating to the acespec and arospec people in our community

Like if you are greyromantic and have been in love, are the aro jokes about not understanding love or relationships excluding you from the community?

Or if you are Ace with a high libido, do the jokes about “x is better than sex” make you feel like you don’t belong?

Idk if that makes sense, but it’s on my mind

To be honest, this is something I have been worrying about for a while as it feels like these jokes are becoming way more frequent now. 

They can be harmless at best, but at worst they can promote (to younger members of the aspec community especially) that aces and aros have to have this specific mindset of “x is better than sex/romance” or “What is sex/romance lol??”. This can throw aces and aros that don’t have that mindset (ex: aces that like sex, grey aces/aros, etc) under the bus and can lead to more intercommunity policing and excluding certain aspec individuals, primarily grey-aces/aros and demi-aces/aros who already get the short end of the stick in the community.

While these jokes can be made, it is also important to encourage and acknowledge aspecs that do understand sex or romance or any relationships along those lines since the ace and aro spectrums are varying and not everyone experiences being aro or ace in the same way. 

I feel like particularly the jokes about not wanting and not thinking about sex are potentially harmful. Especially to aces who are ace because of trauma and may be hypersexual, or just have reoccurring invasive thoughts about sex. Like, that in and off itself is a horrible experience but then being excluded because of that.. not acceptable.

I do think it’s fun and important to talk about not understanding being attracted to people, tho! Cause that was like a huge part of realizing I was ace for me and it’s probably a shared experience. (Like in elementary school everyone hated Draco, cause we were all just reading the books. But then the movies came along and suddenly everyone loved Malfoy and I was so confused and it’s so funny to me now thinking back on that.) I mean sure, some a spec people will have some attraction and some will not have any but I think, that’s a good thing we should talk about. As long as we make it actually about attraction and not the act or smth.

Yeah that definitely makes sense. I think that we should work harder as a community to represent a better balance of Ace and aro experiences.

For the most part I’m Aromantic, and I truly don’t understand romance, so those jokes are relatable, but I don’t want those to be the only thing that unites our community

Update!

This app apparently isn’t available on IOS, I have a Samsung so I wasn’t sure. If anyone else knows of other apps be sure to let us know!

-kai

i just post some stuff about not being part of any ace/aro communities, and then i see this on my dash... its a SIGN

You’re not doing anything wrong dating someone if you’re aromantic. Not feeling romantic attraction doesn’t preclude someone from loving their partner or caring deeply about them.

Dating isn’t inherently romantic. Usually people who are dating are intimate by spending time with eachother, are deeply emotionally invested in eachother, and are exclusive in their emotional attachments while together. Want to skip the traditionally romantic stuff? Don’t feel romantic attraction? You can still date!

i’ve always wondered if my emotions are like... broken as a side effect of years of medication, because even when i really like something or am having a nice time i don’t jump up and run around or constantly say how wonderful everything is. say i get a really nice gift that i really wanted, if i try to act excited about it then i just feel fake or that i’m doing it wrong.

and it’s p much the same in relationships... i’ve been told that i clearly don’t WANT them because i have an attitude that looks like “yeah whatever”, and combined with... not being bothered about sex, i guess it seems like i’m reluctant to be in a relationship.

like this happens a lot, and i know it frustrates other people... maybe part of it is that i am reluctant to feel things, because i’m used to partners deciding that i don’t care so it doesn’t matter if they break it off/cheat. i care about people, but maybe other people care about each other more than i do, in a different way?

i worry that maybe i’m not ace/aro, i’m just sick, and i’m putting ace & aro people in a bad light by associating myself with them.

wow sorry for hijacking this post to be super personal. i guess i don’t join a lot of communities about this stuff (i’m not online a whole lot) so i don’t have any references for what’s ““normal””

Natsuki wallpapers for @queen-hell

Asexual meme of the month: loving and supporting their bisexual brethren unconditionally

Bisexual meme of the month: loving and supporting our asexual brethren unconditionally

👌🏼👏🏻💙💓🌟🌟😻

💓 💓 💓

Defrag Raid 0 Grey Bodycon Dress #striped #grey #orange ://dustrial.net

i think they believe in needing dysphoria to be considered trans, and that being transgender is always by definition a mental/medical condition... i think it means the same as transmedicalist.

like i’ve encountered those kinds of people who totally support nonbinary identities... so long as there’s dysphoria involved in the person feeling it. so they’re... generally being against gender expression/fluidity being considered trans? i think?? or if it’s not medically diagnosed.

not ~believing~ in nbs is probably a different group/name, tho i dunno how much overlap there is.

Non binary glowy melancholic moodboard!-mod lee

Alms for the Poor

Hey y’all. It’s Rabbie. You know the deal. I’m 24, disabled, and without access to much. I have two mouths to feed and finding work has been difficult, a job I thought I got fell through. Please throw some bucks our way if you can–it goes towards food, transportation, and medicine. Thank you.

Paypal: rabbitcomrade@gmail.com Square: cash.me/$RabbieDee