Happy Anniversary, Little Blog.  It’s been a good ride, but it’s time to say Good Bye...

January 1, 2019

Read to the end...it’s not a final good bye :)

I started this blog on January 1, 2011.  My first post had 1 like.  For a long time I had only a few followers.  I started out semi-anonymously.  I told certain friends and family about the blog, but didn’t put my picture on my blog for a while.

At first I mainly posted about food, workouts, and weight loss.  Over the years, it has morphed into a “this is my life” blog - for better or worse.  This is my 7,809th post.

Over the years, I’ve gained followers, but more than that, I’ve gained friends...really really good friends.  I have no clue who actually reads my blog - aside from those who like or comment on posts.  At some point I cross-posted some blog posts on FB, so if you’re from my real life...”hi!”....and maybe let me know if you’re reading?  You can email me at lindsaydoeslife@gmail.com.

Over the years I’ve met tumblrs and other internet friends in real life.  I’ve traveled to meet people who were at first just friends who lived in my computer.  My dad has even met some of my Tumblr/online friends :)

I am so thankful for Tumblr.  Yes, it has it’s flaws, but it has been such a great community for me.  I’ve taken breaks from Tumblr, but I always come back.

But, it’s time to say good bye to LindsayDoesLife.  It’s time to move on.  

It’s not a final good bye.  I’ve just decided it’s time for a fresh start.  

You can now find me at LindsayRises.tumblr.com.  

I do hope to see you over there.  I don’t have the page set up exactly like this one.  Maybe I’ll change the format, maybe I’ll leave it as is.  In my first post I explain why I chose “Lindsay Rises” as my new blog name.  Honestly, you’ll see the same type of stuff I post here.  But, I’m all about fresh starts, and it’s time for that.

Full transparency:  I know I’ll check this page a little longer for any comments on recent posts or any messages, but I’ll be posting (and following people) from LindsayRises.

So, happy 8th anniversary, LindsayDoesLife.  

Good bye.  

And thanks for everything.

December 31, 2018

The picture on the left is of my during March, 2012.  I was at my goal weight (after losing 117 pounds in one year), if not a little under (around 150).  This was my first trip to New York City.  I fit comfortably in the airplane seat.  I had extra room in my seatbelt.  I was happy.  Healthy.  Confident.  Ready to take on the world.  I had enough confidence to ask a stranger, “If I came to New York to cheer on runners at the half marathon in March could I stay with you?”  She said, “Yes.”

The pictures on the right are where I’m at now (307 pounds).  The top right picture was taken by my brother on Christmas Eve.  The bottom right picture was taken when I had coffee with Theodora 4 days ago.

I am not happy.  I am not healthy.  I am not confident.  I overflow in seats.  I had to use seatbelt extenders on my flights out here.  This is my 8th trip to NYC.  Getting around is hard.  Going up and down the subway stairs is difficult.  All of the walking...I know it’s good for me, but it’s hard.

These pictures have made me do something reflecting.  My life will not be long if I keep doing what I’m doing:  eating junk and not working out.  Changes need to be made.  No one can do it but me.  I think sometimes a lot of times I look outside of myself for answers to my problems.  I know - really, truly, deeply know - that the answers are within myself.  

I can’t look to traveling to my favorite city or waiting for New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day to feel magic to spark some change.  I know it must come from within.

I also know that sometimes I try to hard to replicate 2011...or think that I need to replicate 2011 in order to be successful again.  I need to remind myself that if I want a different result (keep weight off), I’ll have to do things differently.

I’m sure some of you are rolling your eyes when I say I’m ready to start again.  If that’s you, I’d suggest you stop reading my blog.  Feel free to unfollow or stop visiting my page.  But I’ll keep trying.  I’ll keep getting back up when I fall down.  2018 was such a hard year emotionally (thanks depression and anxiety).  I’m hopeful 2019 will be easier.  Getting through 2018 has made me realize I can make it through incredibly difficult things.

Seeing those pictures on the right?  It’s painful.  I need to use that pain to spark a fire inside me.  I need to eat better.  i need to exercise.  My health - my life...my future - depends on it.  I know losing weight won’t make me happy, but it sure will help.  I know can do it again because I’ve done it before.  I have goals and I want to make them happen.  It’s up to me, but I’ve got a great support system to help me out which I am so thankful for.

2019 - let’s go.

15,000+ steps today.

Today’s rundown

So I planned on going down to the river to watch the fireworks at the Statue of Liberty.

Due to the rain, I think I’ll just stay in.  Or not.  No, I’ll probably just stay in.

It's bailee!

I posted this on IG and FB, but I don't think I ever posted it here. Here's my IG top 9. It makes me happy my dad made so many of them. He's my rock.

The flatiron building.

Kleenex with wisdom.

Central Park reservoir.

Gothic bridge in central park.

New Jersey

Good morning!

18 things I’m proud of from 2018

Really, I can’t think of 18 things.  

But what I’m most proud of is still being here, even when it’s been hard and I haven’t wanted to keep living.  I didn’t give in.  I didn’t give up.  I’m still here.

Here’s hoping 2019 is better.

So today...

Sunday, December 30, 2018

tomorrow:  Central park (I originally planned on doing that today, too, but I ran out of time since I overslept) and I get to see Bailee!  Oh, and I’m going to try to do WW.  The person on their chat service said meetings before 1:00 are a go.