people today with access to more raw information than any other period: the earth is flat

german artilleryman in 1916, who barely washes his own ass: I need to account for the curvature and rotation of the earth when plotting my firing plans

people today with access to more raw information than any other period: I won’t wear a cloth mask to stop a respiratory disease because a radio show host told me it makes you an emasculated cuck to follow scientific guidelines, and by god I need to eat at this shitty American fast food restaurant *dies a preventable, slow and painful death*

German plague doctor in 1646, who absolutely did not wash his ass: I will cover my eyes, my mouth, and mask the scents that I smell, I will coat my clothing in wax and examine patients from afar with a stick. I know not how the plague is spread, but if I block every transmission route, I can save myself and stave off the chance of being infected *does not die despite being knee deep in a vastly more contagious and hyperlethal disease*

“It was because of my anxiety. Working out, I would just feel better. It was never about losing weight, it was always about becoming strong and giving myself as much time every day without my phone. I got quite addicted to it. I work out two or three times a day. People are shocked because I didn’t share my ‘journey’. They’re used to people documenting everything on Instagram, and most people in my position would get a big deal with a diet brand. I couldn’t give a flying f**k. I did it for myself and not anyone else. So why would I ever share it? I don’t find it fascinating. It’s my body. People have been talking about my body for 12 years. They used to talk about it before I lost weight. But yeah, whatever, I don’t care. You don’t need to be overweight to be body positive, you can be any shape or size. You know a hundred per cent of the stories written about me have been absolutely fake. The people that came out being like, ‘I trained her,’ I’ve never met in my life. It’s disgusting. I cannot get over it. Some Pilates lady I’ve never met in my life! And I haven’t done any diet. No intermittent fasting. Nothing. If anything I eat more than I used to because I work out so hard. And also, that whole thing of like, ‘Gets Revenge Body’… Oh my god. Suck my dick!” she yells into the empty museum. “It’s ridiculous. I think it’s that people love to portray a divorced woman as spinning out of control, like, ‘Oh she must be crackers. She must’ve decided she wants to be a ho.’ Because what is a woman without a husband? It’s bullshit.”

ADELE photographed by Steven Meisel for BRITISH VOGUE (November 2021)

i wish i could google search my own mind like "whats my favourite movie?" or like "who am i?"or "tell me about myself"

hello, world (a test of some virtual singer software!)

(soundcloud)

why does this have so much emotion? melancholy? I dunno why but this slaps and makes me feel sad

Find my voice? Digitally isolated? Your fav could never.

“yes, I’ve been wanting to read that!” I say with complete earnestness, as I proceed to ignore every opportunity I have to read it

“I’ve been meaning to read/watch/listen to that, but the stars are not in position, so I can’t do it yet”

which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?

y- you were putting it in cold water?????

Radish. Answer the question radish.

yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason

You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???

[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]

why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it

Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove

Its takes less than a minute

Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun

How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove

Like seven minutes

Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…

Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted

Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic

everytime I hear about children of the corn I think about the guy I met at comic con who actually lived in the town they filmed that movie at, and on the farm where they filmed in the corn. he was a teenager at the time and him and his friends would get drunk on moonshine and rustle the corn and let the air out of the tires of the production team’s trailers and shit. and now there’s Wikipedia pages about how the children of the corn set was haunted and they thought they angered god but it was really just drunk hillbillies

I don’t like adding to posts but I also have a funny story like this, so I was watching the movie the Blair witch which takes place in burkettsville maryland, which to me is so funny because that is were my grandfather lives and the town is literally just old people and cows with their main street consisting of a post office. Well anyway he told me that after it came out people were coming in like bus loads to the town to find the witch and my grandfather lives up in the Mountain area and people were up in his property trying to find the witch and it made him angry so he went out and hung up stick people and stacked rocks and it freaked the people out so they started thinking something was out there when really it was my 80 year old Italian grandpa who wanted people out of his woods.

We had ghost hunters come to a historic house in my town to film and if you think every high school kid in town respectfully stayed at home that night instead of going to fuck up that filming you’re dead wrong.

this is comforting, actually, sometimes paranormal things are just a bunch of bored people dicking around in the woods.

New favorite cryptid: locals

I know this is going to make me sound pretensions but I have to get it off my chest. I feel an unimaginable rage when someone posts a photo and is like "this picture looks like a renaissance painting lol" when the photo clearly has the lighting, colors and composition of a baroque or romantic painting. There are differences in these styles and those differences are important and labeling every "classical" looking painting as renaissance is annoying and upsetting to me. And anytime I come across one of those posts I have to put down my phone and go take a walk because they make me so mad

In case you're curious here's what I mean.

Renaissance(distinct lines, stability and the individual man):

Baroque (bold, chaotic, dramatic):

Romantic(romanticize the simple hard working life):

Do you see the difference?

op is a vampire who painted works in all of these times

“are u okay?” no i need more money

SOMEBODY I USED TO KNOW CAME OUT 10 YEARS AGO ?

love wins <3

wait this is the song isn't it

*says ‘I’m so fucking sick of this pandemic shit’ in a distinctly vaccinated, pro mask, pro lockdown, pro taking all the necessary safety measures way*