I've been told my friendships are one of my biggest strengths
So why the Fuck
Is it hard again
To turn to whomever I need to
And why the fuck is it
That by the time I muster the fucking courage to approach someone
They let me down every fucking time.
And why the Fuck
Did I expect anything different?
I should know better by now.
Maybe if I become the evil bitch you think I am I'll actually get something out of it other than the heartbreak of being called an evil bitch by you.
Nah, Im not tryig to threaten you.
Im not trying to be some gallant fucjung knight
Im just trying to offer to take out the garbage
Because you keep making it evident every fucking day that that's what I am to you
That i stink up the house just by fucking existing
That you dont want me here
So no its not a threat
Its a fucking favor.
To you and me both.
pizza head doodles :]
"That's the Pizza Tower tutorial song." "No, it's a traditional Italian folk song." No, it's literally a 140-year-old meme – "Funiculì, Funiculà" was written in 1880, as a joke, to commemorate the opening of a tourist attraction at Mount Vesuvius. (The tourist attraction was later destroyed by a volcanic eruption.) Go ahead and rewrite the lyrics to be about sticking your dick in a pizza – there is nothing you can do with this song that's more ridiculous than its original context.
#oh my god #how can it be funnier in the original context than #the pizza on my cock one (via @profiction-monika)
The original Neapolitan lyrics are about a young man inviting his girlfriend to come ride a cable-car up the side of a mountain. And up, and down, and up, and down, and up, and down, and... well, it's not just about the cable-car, is what I mean to say.
"Haha, funny pizza tower joke, David. Let's learn what guiseppe's all about. Hey wiki, who's Guiseppe Turco?"
"Do you mean Peppino Turco?"
"No, I mean- wh- Oh This Was Not A Joke That David Was Pulling On Us"
There's genuinely nothing I could make up about this song that's sillier than its real history. Very Serious Composers have on multiple unconnected occasions mistaken this advertising-jingle-slash-dick-joke for a traditional Neapolitan folk song and incorporated it into their Very Serious Compositions. Richard Strauss actually got sued over it.
Here's a wild take. Can we,,,not treat sick, mentally ill or disabled people like they're assholes for having this thing that the definitely didnt fucking ask for? Cuz I'd honestly rather be fucking lobotomized than have to hear one more time how annoying it is to take care of me. It would be pretty effective at solving both of our problems.
d-d-d-danciNG PARTNER??????? ✨ 👀✨
food
Me: *having a mental breakdown at 3 am*
My foryou page: "hey wanna learn how to tie a fuckin noose well here you go"
Starbucks funded the police in Atlanta so here’s their recipes
do you have a link to the images cause they’re a little small and compressed
If your partner feels threatened when you want alone time: RUN.
welp
thats creepy
This applies to you boys too- if your girlfriend won’t let you hang out with your friends, RUN
No matter what gender you or your partner are, if they refuse to let you spend any time with your friends that’s a big sign of danger.
GUESS WHAT MY EX BELIEVED 🙃🙃🙃
Last time I reblogged this I lost ten followers, someone I liked blocked me, and I got hate mail in my inbox for several days. Let’s see what happens this time.
Abuse begins with insecurity
My ex wouldn’t even accept a ride from my friend who offered to drive us home in the pouring Orlando rain and instead forced us to walk 12 minutes in the rain, soaking my only pair of work shoes and giving me a cold. FUCKING RED FLAGS
Me: doot doot doot doot *reblogs this* doot doot doot *reblogs this again* doot-
EMERGENCY IN NARMM/ MELBOURNE (AUSTRALIA) RIGHT NOW! LOCAL GOVT AND POLICE ARE UNFAIRLY TARGETING COMMUNITIES LIVING IN PUBLIC HOUSING IN LIGHT WITH A RECENT SPIKE IN COVID CASES. I HAVE COMPLIED LINKS WITH MORE INFORMATION AND WAYS TO HELP BELOW!
