I need people to stop glorifying the 4B movement in Korea, from a Western (white) perspective. Stop it. If you are blissfully unaware of this (having not been on TikTok) - in theory, it makes sense. No sex with men, no dating men, no child rearing with men, and no marriage with men. But. BUT. Feminists in Korea are problematic AF. I know this from both personal experience (having been on the receiving end of their ire online) and everything I've read about them, in Korean. I see all these white TikTokers (and even some in the Korean diaspora) fawning over how "we" in the US need this and, no. If your feminism is transphobic, hates gay men, hates men in general, that's not the feminism I'd endorse. Why is Korean feminism transphobic? In 2020, Korean feminists ACTIVELY CAMPAIGNED AGAINST a woman who was accepted to Sookmyung University. An all womens' university. But she was a woman, you say. What could be their problem? According to Korean feminists, they didn't want a "man" in their space. Because she is a trans woman. This is not unusual for Korean feminists. Having lived there for 5 years, to some extent, I understand their anger against misogyny. But if you are truly against the toxic patriarchy that exists in Korea, you must also help dismantle military conscription because that is where a lot of men become radicalized, bullied, etc etc and "grow up" to be the most toxic form of men seen on this earth. But Korean feminists don't give AF about that and in fact, I've read a lot of them express that it's good for men to suffer. Guess what? That view is internalized misogyny and toxic patriarchy, too. And I don't want to hear it about the movement being so "young". Korean women have stepped up to the plate before in our history. We are capable of better than this fucking nonsense. It's a bunch of transphobic, gay hating radicals that have hijacked what was supposed to be about social justice. WOMAD (link is to the Wikipedia article, not their site) and Megalia are the two sites they stem from. It is the most toxic group of people I've ever had the displeasure to encounter online. Any form of criticism is, at best, ignored and worst - I've been "called out" for being Korean-American, and therefore, to "butt out" of "Korean issues". Amongst other bullying I've personally received. And yes, not just on forums but on public articles that I've commented on.

I know it's a catchy title and it appeals in theory but please, please do not glorify these transphobes and TERFs. They don't deserve your attention.

So, the transphobes have discovered this post.

And you know what?

I'm doubling down.

Trans rights are human rights.

You all are an utter embarrassment, both on this site and as human beings.

You've demonstrated the bullying that trans folks go through on a daily basis and it only makes me want to protect them more. The trans he, she, and theys.

The sheer audacity to attack me for calling out my own culture for being wrong.

None of you are Korean. Not a single one. And even if you were - what's wrong is wrong.

hey koreaboos, listen to the korean trans people on this one

Speaking of therapy, I say, as though we're old friends, and you're not a stranger trapped in this metaphorical elevator with me and you can hear the suspension wires starting to fray.

I've been doing a lot of work recently that's focused on imposter syndrome and the feeling that no matter how well or how much I do, I'm not good enough. That I'm somehow tricking everyone into thinking my work is actually good.

Some days it's a minor niggle in my head that I can gentle and soothe with logic and affirmations. Or smother, depending on the mood. Other times it's loud and all-consuming and the mental anguish it causes me is so real I can feel it twitching in my muscles. This desperate fight-or-flight instinct with nowhere to go and nothing to fight but myself.

Anyway, because I'm several types of Mentally Unwell™, I was switching between workshop sheets ahead of next week. Filling in different forms. (Trying to get a good grade in therapy) And I got my "recognize your harmful ADHD coping mechanisms" worksheet mixed in with the "you're not actually lying to people, you just feel like you are because your brain is full of weasels" worksheet, and seeing them side by side made something go topsy turvy in my head, and I just had to sit and breathe for a couple of minutes until the urge to scream passed. Because it clicked, it all suddenly clicked.

The reason the imposter syndrome workshops and therapy sessions aren't sticking was because I do routinely trick people into thinking I'm someone I'm not.

Because I'm masking my ADHD for their convenience.

I've always known there was something wrong with me. My neurotypical peers made it abundantly clear I didn't fit in or was failing in some way I couldn't see nor remedy, no matter how hard I tried.

So I compressed myself into a workaholic box of hyper-competence in the hopes they'd stop noticing the flaws and exploit like me instead. And then subsequently lived with the daily fear that if they looked too close, they'd realize I'm a monumental fuck up with enough personal baggage to block the Suez Canal.

If you ever need someone to burn themselves to ashes for your comfort and convenience, I'm your gal.

Or I used to. Until I had a bit of a breakdown, and the rubber band holding my brain together snapped and pinged off into the stratosphere, never to be seen again.

Unfortunately, the trauma of living like that didn't also fuck off and instead left a gaping maw where my personality ought to be, so now I get to deal with that aftermath.

And it's that aftermath that's affecting the imposter syndrome shit. Because yes, I am hyper-competent and good at what I do-- but it doesn't feel real because that is how I mask.

And the truly frustrating thing is I am good at what I do. I am not pretending. I worked hard to be good at this. It just feels like I'm dicking around because 90% of my personality turns out to be trauma masquerading as humor in a trenchcoat, and having people genuinely like something weird I'm doing is so foreign my brain has decided it's just another form of masking.

I'm pretending to be a good author so people will think I'm a good author, and my brain thinks we are in Danger of being found out. We are in Danger, and writing is Dangerous because then people will know I'm Weird and not whatever palatable version I've presented myself as for their NT sensibilities.

Like the neurotic vampire with a raging praise kink wasn't an obvious giveaway.

Anyway. I got nothing else. Thanks for listening.

I'm going to go be very normal in another room and not stare into the abyss of my own soul for a bit.

I brought this post up with my ADHD therapist today (who also has ADHD), and she got so still that I thought our Zoom call had frozen.

Turns out she just needed to stare into her soul for a bit and it looked like this:

Every so often, I see notes from this post go past in my activity feed, and the tags really do look like a mass of people screaming as the suspension wires holding up the metaphorical elevator snap and we all plunge into the abyss.

Sorry/happy to have helped rip the bandaid off that coping mechanism for you. Hope it wasn't too load-bearing...

Anyway. I'm starting EMDR trauma therapy for this soon because I haven't been able to gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss DBT my way out of this one, so, y'know, really puts the trauma of masking in perspective when you have to resort to the same desensitization and reprocessing therapy you use to cope with the cPTSD from literally almost dying.

I'll let you know how it goes.

My brain is currently a stewpot of memes about bafflement, screaming, laughter with a hysterical edge, and “…oh shit.”

Wake up folks new absolute Legend on TikTok

For All Mankind fanwork offerings for FTH!

Y'all there are SEVEN (7) For All Mankind fanworks on offer in this year's @fandomtrumpshate auction! That means we are going to get up to seven (7) new FAM fanworks! (which is nothing to sneeze at in a tiny fandom like ours.)

The catch: most of these creators are offering to create for other fandoms, too. We've got to make sure to win these auctions ourselves!

wait, what is Fandom Trumps Hate?

FTH is a fanworks auction that raises money for progressive nonprofits (here's this year's list.) The folks listed below are offering to make a fanwork for their highest bidder, but the money doesn't go to the creator themselves: the winning bidder donates directly to the nonprofit and sends in proof of donation to the auction, and then creator and bidder are put in touch to start planning out a fanwork. You can read more about the auction here. Okay, onto the fanwork offerings!

themysterybox (aka @frankandpercy) is offering to write a fic of 10-20K in length, up to an E rating. They're particularly excited to take on alternate universes, and are also interested in writing poly fic, genderswap, trans characters/interpretations of characters, f/f, and ambiguous or unhappy endings.

els (aka @midnight-els) is offering a fic of 5-10K words, up to an E rating. els is especially interested in f/f ships, queer interpretations of characters, and happy or open endings.

naturaliseme (@naturaliseme) is offering a fic of up to 5K, up to an E rating, focusing either on Margo/Molly or Margo/Irina.

Avawtsn (@antaranya) has two FAM offers (#2 and #3). the first of which is for podfic (!!!!) She will produce an audio recording of your fic (or someone else's, if you get permission for it) of 5-10K words, up to a T rating.

Avawtsn's second FAM offer is an art offering (and you should take a look at those portfolio links, this is very exciting for us.)

I, @tiltedsyllogism, also have two offers! I will write you a fic of 5-10K, up to an E rating, and I'm pretty wide-open on who and what I'll write about. I like character studies and missing scenes, and I'm particularly interested in writing stories that capture the many different emotional layers of longstanding relationships.

I also have a fan labor offering: I will Yankpick or Russia-pick (or both!) a story of yours that is in process, and advise as best I can about everything from background culture to common turns of speech to local landmarks. I am also happy to do a more typical beta read in addition to/instead of language and culture-picking.

Bidding for the auction runs March 5th-9th, but you can read about these offerings in more detail now at the links above. You can also follow @fandomtrumpshate if you want reminders!

I went a little wild with my first outing with FTH, so here are two things for For All Mankind, a podfic offer and some art...? I can't wait to see what suggestions I get for the art tbh. I'm excited! Some art samples are maybe warranted...

This is all digital freehand type work, raster, digital painting, whatever you wanna call it (sorry for the sprinkles, it was my attempt to watermark:

And this is vector work, which is mostly just a different style, not sketchy or painterly, and because it's basically all math equations instead of brush strokes, has the capability to be blown up infinitely. And the bottom row is stuff that I think I can definitely do a lot better, they were early or super quick:

And then I didn't add it as a specific offer, but I can also turn art into fic covers and such. (Or magazine mockups, etc)

made this cake for my bf’s 30th birthday and i’m so annoyingly proud of it

I have a very rough idea in my head that I don't think I can clearly articulate beyond "And that concludes tonight's reports on German air forc—WHAT'S THIS? IT'S KING ARTHUR WITH A STEEL CHAIR"

IDK what this is about, but I want to know more.

This isn't exactly the same idea but it could be but there is more rattling around in here so:

"a catholic priest" i mean yeah sure why not but JRRTOLKIEN himself was alive and a teacher at the time so go big or go home.

You know what sure why not let's just make literal real-life JRRT himself a character in this Arthurian return story, he deserves it.

@seajr DUDE

I would join the kickstarter for this movie/show, but in the meantime I have a new search I wanna do on @ao3org or possibly a bid to think about for @fandomtrumpshate

Do you kids know how hard it is to hyper fixate on shit as a goddamn adult?? Sorry boss I know you need those files done but I’m too busy giggling like a goddamn school girl over a fictional man

a comic about fix-it fanfics

my favorite scene in LotR as a kid was when Sam started miserably freestyling in the tower of Cirith Ungol and the only reason he ever found Frodo was because he deliriously tried to join in

…i did read some of the novels, but i couldn’t get through them entirely…

…and so i genuinely have no idea whether or not this is serious. coz i mean, obviously, it could be a joke. but it could also have legitimately happened. people who have only seen the films underestimate the amount of random things that happen in the books that could come off as utterly silly and ridiculous if removed from their context.

Haha, well, it is pretty much what happens. Sam is looking for Frodo in the tower of Cirith Ungol and is despairing that he will ever find him. He sits down and does what any self-respecting Tolkien character does during their moments of hopelessness and bursts into song.

It’s a really good song (ten year old Ship had it memorized) and as he begins the refrain a second time, he hears Frodo’s voice answering weakly from above. Frodo is poisoned and despairing and beaten but he is still a Hobbit and cannot resist a singalong even while on the brink of death.

I just have to reblog because it makes me laugh EVERY TIME

birds flying over the jurassic canyon of Iceland

Did you know that between 1939 and 1941 the NYC Tax Administration and the Works Progress Administration collaborated to take photographs of nearly every building in all 5 boroughs of New York City? And that you can see these photos today thanks to NYC Municipal archiving? This is, obviously, amazing for hundreds of reasons. For the purposes of this post, it's fantastic because this is a very real address:

And when I put that address into the photo locator map, I get this:

Going from there, we can walk around the surrounding blocks via photographs. And if we assume that Steve and Bucky's pre-war apartment was fairly close to the Barnes', then these photos from 1939 to 1941 are a historically accurate trip to their neighborhood.

So, let's explore some pre-war Brooklyn. For your fic inspiration needs, your feelings, the general Stucky vibes, or just because:

By Czeck writer Karel Čapek, inventor of the term ‘robot’ as well!

This is one of my husband’s favorite short stories. He quotes it from memory. I’m pretty sure he can recite the entire thing from memory.

This is a tremendously impactful short story and every time I see it, it serves as an excellent reboot button for my state of mind.

FTH 2024 Creator Signups are OPEN!

The moment you've been waiting for has arrived! But before you rush straight to the signup form, note that a few things are different from last year:

You can view this year's full list of fandoms here - remember that if the fandom you want isn't listed, there is a write-in option. However, check all possible names for your fandom before resorting to write-in! If your fandom is a spinoff, choose the fandom it's related to and specify in your auction notes which parts of canon/the universe you're willing to create for. Every fandom with subfandoms also has an "Any" option if you're willing to create for anything within the top-level fandom and an "Other" option to write in subfandoms.

Even if you've signed up before, please re-read the FAQ to re-familiarize yourself with our policies. If you're new to FTH, check out these tips for first-time creators (and also read the FAQ). It might also help to peruse last year's listings to get an idea for what kind of information people include and how we use the information you give us to form our tagging system.

Remember that you can offer up to three auctions, but you will need to fill out a separate signup for each of those. Each auction can only be for one type of fanwork, but can be offered in up to 3 fandoms (and unlimited subfandoms if you choose a fandom with subfandoms) or "Any fandom." Your bidder will get to choose from any of the fandoms in the listing, so please don't offer something you don't want to create just to get more eyes on your auction.

Signups will be open for two weeks, until February 19th, so there's no rush! Take your time and make sure you understand how it all works and what you're committing to. If you have any questions not covered here or in our FAQ, please email us at fandomtrumpshate @ gmail.com!

Ok, did you read all that? You know what's different from last year? You've refreshed your knowledge of our FAQ?

In that case, sign up for FTH 2024 here!

I get missing the Honeymoon Phase of the relationship once you're out of it but like what is a relationship if not Hanging Out. There is no higher form of love, of human connection, than Hanging Out. Why would you ever give up on that. All of mankind's endeavors, the very instinct wired into us as biological creatures, all of it points towards the holiness inherent to Just Chilling With Someone

How can I support Gaza with my FTH auction?

Among the organizations selected for FTH this year, none are exclusively devoted to providing aid for Gaza. However, we want to draw your attention to two orgs that are doing important work, and are small enough that our donations will make a real difference to them. Please consider selecting one of them if you wish to raise money for this cause.

Never Again Action is a Jewish-led organization that is currently mobilized against genocide in Gaza and calling for a ceasefire.

Middle East Children's Alliance and partners are providing emergency assistance to families who have fled their homes to seek shelter with relatives as well as procuring emergency medical supplies for hospitals and clinics.

As always, creators may also specify a nonprofit of their choice. The FTH mods will do our best to verify that any such orgs are legitimate before posting, but they won't have been subjected to the same level of scrutiny as our officially supported nonprofits.

i’m such a “i want your attention” but “won’t bother you” kinda person

Got that vampire autism where you gotta invite me in every time