Oh, you think you're safe now?

Nothing can deliver you from these paws!

did anyone else watch the show “the most extreme” on animal planet. what was that green shit about.

these are all real screenshots from “the most extreme”

in my sleep tonight

Doug Jones as Amphibian Man in The Shape of Water 03/??

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...

I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED

POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

Reblog to let your followers know that they’re safe from jumpscares/screamers/etc from you on April 1st but they are NOT safe from getting boop’d like an idiot amen

why do the burger king employees always blast my whooper with mayo as if they want the damn thing pregnant

whooper??????????

middle schooler obsessed with using perfect grammar online -> adult who uses like every text abbreviation possible

Master the rules then grow beyond them obviously

on a similar note:

middle schooler obsessed with never swearing because it makes you look stupid -> adult who says fuck three times a sentence

i like it when pit bulls do this

can someone hire me as a lighthouse keeper. my grip on reality is soooo stable and i will behave so normally under conditions of extreme isolation. and i promise i wont try to fuck the light

Customer: I’M A PROFESSIONAL FISHERMAN AND I FISH FOR TUNA ALL OVER THE WORLD DMV: I GOOGLED HIM, HE IS AND HE DOES Verdict: DENIED