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easy, tiger

@i-promise-im-funny-occasionally / i-promise-im-funny-occasionally.tumblr.com

ENTJ | 5'4 | Will sell my soul for one single corn chip
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ramyeongif

ADHD

Add onto this the constant feeling of being overwhelmed. You didn’t get the laundry done yesterday and now there are piles of it. You forgot to take out the chicken so now you’re trying to throw something together for dinner at 9 pm. You forgot to order your prescription and now it’s the weekend so you’re going to go without for 2 days. There are dishes in the sink. You forgot to plug in the vacuum so now you can’t even clean the floor. There are hobbies you can’t do because you’ve convinced yourself you aren’t allowed to experience fun until the work is finished. Slowly, it all builds and you are left sitting there with so much to do and the inability to organize tasks leaves you paralyzed and lost amid everything! Honestly, you fucking break down crying because you feel like an incomplete person incapable of caring for themselves.

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dashlit

in sixth grade my homeroom teacher caught this kid stephen saying, “that’s so gay.”

so he told the class that for the rest of the week, anytime you wanted to express something negatively, you could say, “that’s so stephen.”

and it started out as a joke, where even this stephen kid was going around using it, laughing at it, not really caring. it was funny, i guess.

but then one of his friends got a bad mark on a test and said, “that’s so stephen.”

we had a blacktop recess and everyone kept saying, “that’s so stephen.”

and when we got too loud doing groupwork and had to separate and work silently, everyone in the class kept muttering, “that’s so stephen.”

and the weirdest part was that even though it was just a word we were using, even though it had nothing to do with stephen, we all sort of blamed stephen.

and as everyone kept using “that’s so stephen,” all week, you could see stephen himself finding it less and less funny. we played a game called “pamplemousse” in french class and everyone got stephen out right away if they could. someone literally went and found one of stephen’s art projects when nobody else was around and ruined it so he had to start over.

and when my homeroom teacher found out about it, he sat everyone down and told us that it wasn’t okay to say “that’s so stephen” anymore. that the things we’d been blaming him for weren’t his fault and the things we’d been doing to him weren’t fair.

he told us that stephen couldn’t help it that he was stephen. he didn’t choose to be stephen. he was born stephen.

and that’s when it clicked.

we all felt pretty stupid, i think, for sort of falling for it, but i’ll be damned if i’ve ever had a teacher get a lesson across so utterly and completely as mr. bernard did.

it hadn’t even been the full week.

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woodlandhomo

One time I tried to say “take care” after ringing up a customer. I opened my mouth and for some reason I was unable to make a noise except for a very small “t-eh” sound initially and by the time I remembered how to make words I had to shout across the store for them to hear me. What I ended up saying was “Take over!!!” after which they glanced back at me uncomfortably and left without another word.

I am haunted by that interaction to this day.

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