Ok, question. Why not use the For You page at that point?

Because it sucks

boi no. go back while you still can. a good chunk of my answers are in the quads

Ryo Yamada x Male Reader

She leaves you for a woman (and takes all of your money)

Dancing Marcille!

based on this dancing marcille

Marcille x Male Reader headcanons!

shitpost number 5 thousand

I can’t state enough how beneficial it was to work at the sex shop as my first retail job. We were encouraged to practice shutting down inappropriate behavior and it became a well practiced skill set. I had a flat stare, icy tones of disapproval, and a demeanor of untouchable scorn to back it all up. I could get the most hardened of perverts to back off or leave in a matter of sentences if they harassed staff or other customers.

When I moved on to selling mattresses I came prepared to handle pretty much any situation with the unruffled calm of someone who has asked Santa to stop touching himself and leave. To my vast surprise it was a skill I needed on the regular at the mattress store. For whatever reason men thought it was the height of entertainment to sexually harass me because I was young and cheerful.

They would always quickly learn they’d picked the wrong target.

One day a man strolled in, sizing me up as he came. He saw a young, tiny, afab person alone in the store and came to a stop way too close. He used his height to leer down at me and said, “I’m looking for a new headboard. Which ones are the best for sex?”

It was so stupid. He looked down at me with half lidded eyes and the grin of a man who owns an unmarked white van. He probably expected me to laugh uncomfortably or act flustered. He wanted to feel tall and powerful or maybe even sexy.

He was not expecting what he got. My face stretched into what could technically be described as a smile but was more accurately a threat display. The temperature in the room plummeted as I dropped all warmth in my demeanor. He took a half step back, suddenly aware that he was alone in a room with me.

“Well, sir, that depends on what kind of sex you’re having. If you are looking for a headboard that is grippeable, I suggest this model. The metal is rounded and wouldn’t hurt a hand gripping it tightly. However if you want something that you can secure with restraints, I recommend this wooden one as the slats are wide and quite sturdy.”

He looked liked I’d hit him over the head with a board and stared down at me blankly, taken aback by the authoritative way that I discussed the merits of his lackluster sex life. I met his eyes, a veiled threat in mine, and said, “Which one will you be purchasing?”

He tucked his tail between his legs and bought the metal one. I pulled up a thin layer of friendliness as I rang him up but he had the chastened air of a man who just ran straight into an iron pole.

Another time a man crawled up onto a tempurpedic and thrusted into an invisible partner. He gave a cocky look over his shoulder, sure that he was going to discomfit me as he asked, “How are these babies for fucking?”

I gave him a deadpan look and and said, “That depends on if you’re someone who has to rely on the bounce of springs for your thrusts. Memory foam beds are nicer on knees and joints for positions like doggy style but they absorb a lot of kinetic energy.”

He visibly deflated and got down off the bed with a vaguely ashamed air.

He bought a spring mattress.

some idiot aprox. 5 seconds after bothering the OP:

its really cool that we discovered glass which is the material that doesnt have any chemical reactions with anything in the universe very useful for doing chemistry due to being able to put things in it to contain chemical reactions and never having it react with the things that are in it due to it being completely and entirely unreactive to every chemical

Posts from a 17th century chymist who's about to have their bones dissolved by hydrofluoric acid.

HYDROFLUORIC ACID MENTION‼️

DICKS OUT FOR HYDROFLUORIC ACID!!!

NOT A GOOD IDEA!!!!!

Do not cite the old magic to me. I was there when it was written.

Sometimes I look at the Big Hair People in the comics I wrote back then and have to remind myself that, actually, they were, if anything, understated.

marine biology is so scary because it’s such a small field. i was giving a talk on cetaceans and afterward a woman approached me with her husband and she said, “you did very well. [husband’s name] actually pioneered the research and published the first paper on that. We were very impressed by you.”

Which is such a scientific interpretation/public education win I will cherish forever but also for the rest of my life any time I give a talk I will be haunted by the knowledge that the world’s leading expert who literally discovered/invented the topic might be in the room,

which is like, the opposite of what you’re supposed to do for stage fright. In fact I never used to experience stage fright but now I will.

There are limitations to the benefits of being a marine biologist

(me, my parents, my sister, and the baby are sitting at the kitchen table eating lunch)

baby, pointing at the light fixture over the table and signing "on": o.*

my sister: we actually can't turn that light on right now, because the lightbulb inside is burnt out! it needs a new one.

baby: ighbu.

sister: yes, lightbulb! granddaddy said after we eat he's going to climb up there on a ladder and change it, and then the light will come on!

baby: gadada! adda, uuu! ighbu o!

sister: exactly!

baby, signing "on" and pointing at the light and then my dad, with increasing urgency: GADADA ADDA UUUU. O.

my sister: we're going to finish eating first though, ok?

baby: nonono. O. gadada adda uuu.

[a split second goes by]

baby, pointing to himself: ba. adda uuu. ighbu.

me: you're going to climb the ladder and change the lightbulb yourself?

baby: dzyeah. *pointing to the buckle where he is buckled into the high chair* ububu.

me: unbuckle you? so you can change the lightbulb?

baby, highly businesslike: dzyeah.

*pronounced like "on" without the n

this comment passes peer review

they thells she shells by the he whore

it's so fucking frustrating to be in college and know everyone uses chatgpt and to be tempted by it constantly while also knowing intellectually that it doesn't work and it's a bad idea. like, i hang out in the library a lot, and i see people using chatgpt on assignments almost every day. and i know it isn't a good way to learn, because it's not really "artificial intelligence" so much as it is an auto text generator. and it gives you wrong information or badly worded sentences all the time. but every week i stare down assignments i don't want to do and i think man. if only i could type this prompt into a text generator and have it done in 10 minutes flat. and i know it wouldn't work. it wouldn't synthesize information from the text the way professors want, it wouldn't know how to answer questions, it just spits out vaguely related words for a couple paragraphs. but knowing my classmates get their work done in 10 minutes flat with it while i fight every ounce of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder in my body is infuriating.

i think one thing that's been really helpful in keeping myself from using it is thinking about Why i have to do the specific assignments i have. like what is the actual goal. like some assignments the goal isn't "share a story about parenting styles in ur personal life" so much as it is "show you understand the concept of parenting styles thru a story". or it's not "how do hormones impact teenagers' decision making abilities" it's "can you understand, reword, synthesize, and explain the information in the text and videos to explain how hormones impact teenagers' decision making abilities". and looking at it as "this assignment is asking me to read some words and then understand and explain them, which is a skill i want to have" rather than "i have to answer these stupid questions that seem really obvious because all my professors want me to die forever" has helped. especially in a world where everyone uses chatgpt i want to know how to read with my own brain

[Video description: A two part video of a challenge and response. The video starts with a conventionally attractive young white woman. A white line moves from the top of the screen downwards, across her face, as seen in many videos showing the before and after effects of video filters. However, the line pauses and the viewer realizes it is not a video filter effect, it’s a piece of white string that the woman is moving herself using her hands off camera. She grabs the center of the string with her tongue, and, using only her mouth, ties it in a knot. This particular party trick, plus her deliberately seductive expression, is meant to imply that she is unusually talented at giving oral sex. She ends her video with a challenging face, as if daring the viewer to do better.

The video cuts to someone who has taken up the challenge. This time it’s an old grandmother, with lovely deep wrinkles. She starts her video the same with moving the string across her face and grabbing it in her mouth. She begins to move her mouth around with a look of deep concentration. The video cuts to imply that time has passed. The grandmother pulls the center of her string out of her mouth to show off her results. It looks like a surprisingly large tangled mess. She keeps pulling and unfolds it to reveal that it’s actually an entire crocheted doily that she had stuffed into her mouth. She gives a wheezing little laugh at her own joke. End ID. /]

as an aroace, im particularly dangerous, because i wont fuck or marry. i only know how to kill.

Yes. These bastards (and actually the whole Sheikah design) is based on the japanese Jomon pottery.

you….. you understand the implications of this, right? the pottery is finally revolting against Link after all these years

And not just any pottery. The oldest piece of Jomon pottery is somewhere around 16,500 years old, making it the earliest example of pottery in Japan and one of the earliest in the entire world.

Link has smashed so many vases that the Elder Pots themselves are coming to kill him.

In Breath of The Wild, pot smashes you.

idk man the nervous system makes me kinda nervous