DTLS AU Volumes

Well, since I now have everything all organized for the most part, I can finally drop the links here.

I’ve finally gone through and (for the most part) gathered as many of the links for the threads in the DTLS AU as I can. By that I mean, all the main volumes, most of the Interstitials, and a handful of funny chats between characters outside of that.

So I’ll go ahead and make a nice, easy-to-access post with all of them. In case anyone’s been looking to actually read mine and Theo’s fun little crossover AU, but struggled with keeping up due to it being a bit unorganized.

I’m putting everything under a readmore, just so I’m able to go in and edit as we go, or when I eventually find more links to add. And at some point, I might also add the link to the proper DTLS AU ‘Wiki’ we’ve been working on once its a bit more fleshed out.

But with all that said, links to everything are below. Enjoy the fruits of our labor over the past few years! Also apologies if you have to scroll a bit on each post, that’s on Tumblr’s end and we can sadly only do so much.

Keep reading

Y'all know how I’m always like “Read DTLS”? Well, with the newest updates to the comment section and Hayley’s hard work on compiling the links, it’s now easier than ever!

Go read DTLS

Writers!! Describe your current WIP(s) in the most boring way possible. I want to see this skdjfkdfhk

every single thing people have said has been amazing, I'm dying laughing here

I have some predictions about the notes of this post

My wife left me last week, very sad. She said we had a difference of interest- all I wanted to do was talk philosophy, and she just wanted to discuss car dealership scams. It was the old chestnut, you know- I was putting Descartes before dehorse.

This is the closest I got but it doesn't really work does it?

You did it. You crazy son of a bitch, you did it. I've been trying to construct this joke for years and could never make it happen and you did it! Brava!`

AI-generated Valentine cards

Tired of generic greetings?

Confuse your friends with AI-generated Valentine cards!

GPT-3 generated the messages and descriptions, and then I followed its instructions to create the cards. More explanation here!

How this abomination came to be (and bonus content)

You can get these on real cards - confuse your human friends!

I'm glad the beginning of the post specified that these were ai generated because I would have just assumed these were either memes I wasn't aware of or fandom-themed Valentines, just as incomprehensible to an outsider as any other fandom-themed Valentine

Not sure if it’ll work, white people like cantalope too

There’s no way to describe a painful headache without it sounding sexual. Example: throbbing, pounding, pulsing, etc.

Have you considered most of those words only sound sexual in a sexual context, like ig someone tells me they have a throbbing headache I’m not gonna think of throbbing as sexual.

Also, words like blinding, grinding, sharp, and stabbing work just as well.

Depends on your kinks

To be fair, if you told me “there’s a state that has its own ounces for some reason”, Florida would be my first guess

ok but legitimately i think the reason why kids aren’t taking internet safety seriously is because the people who are telling us not to put our personal information out seem so out of touch. no one acknowledges the possibility of meeting very real teenaged friends online, they always say that everyone you meet is a 40 year old white man in disguise. because they aren’t acknowledging things we know are true, it becomes a lot easier to dismiss the rest of what they’re saying as well. internet safety lessons absolutely must keep up with the times and acknowledge the internet’s capacity for good if you want kids to take to heart warnings about its capacity for bad.

Some actual safety tips for teenagers:

1. Have proof they're a teenager first. More than just a picture, have a video call with them.

2. If you want to meet up with them, have your parents or a trusted adult come with you. Even if they are a proven teenager, its still good to have supervision in case any issues happen.

3. If you are talking to an adult, and they start being sexual in any way, you run the fuck away. It doesn't matter if they're 40 or 20. An adult inherently has a power dynamic that teenagers do not. And its up to the adult to act responsible about it. There's exceptions of course, if you're 16 and dating an 18 year old, that's not a problem, we're not talking about that.

4. Being in a server with adults or ran by adults is not inherently bad. Talking to adults is not inherently a problem, and will likely happen in any number of Discord servers. It is only an issue when they are acting sexual and show predatory behavior.

5. Look out for grooming behavior. It can be difficult, because at first it seems like innocuous behavior, like complimenting or giving gifts. Especially if you feel lonely and have low self esteem. And groomers actively target people like that.

If they start trying to isolate you, talk sexual with you, state they depend on you for emotional needs, blame you for their own actions, try to be secretive about the relationship- Then you need to talk to people you trust, block the perpetrator, and call the police on them.

6. If this does happen to you, remember this: It is not your fault. Even if you didn't listen to a single thing listed here, it is not your fault. It is the fault of the adults who knew better, and didn't care. It's not your fault.

To my followers: if any of you guys are underaged, please be very VERY careful on here, and don’t fall for any of the tricks the groomer would use on you, just block them and report them.

To teens online:

One of the ways to protect yourself from groomers, is to find adult communities and hang out there. Not "sexytiemz" communities, just places that are overwhelmingly full of adults. (Ravelry, if you have an interest in knitting or crocheting. Mobileread, if you care about ebooks. And so on. Somewhere large and active and not focused on a fandom that goes through bizarre drama every three monts.)

Notice how adults talk to each other. How they talk to friends; how they talk to new strangers who have an interest in their fandoms or hobbies or whatever. How they talk to kids in all-ages spaces. How they joke with each other and with teens. How they compliment each other and are supportive; how they offer criticism intended to be taken in good faith. And how they troll and attack each other, sometimes.

Knowing what normal adult behavior looks like will go a long way toward being able to identify predatory behavior.

Teens need to learn the difference between supportive friendship and grooming, and between someone who's angry (or even a jerk) and someone who's actively abusive.

And remember: The dangerous adults are not the ones saying "I am 45 and still interested in teen superhero fandoms." They're the ones saying "I'm 16 and I have a no-adults-allowed Discord; please join me and we can be friends!"

Predators lie.

Also remember that all of us were teenagers once and many of us were teenagers on the internet and also had those feelings of "adults telling us not to give out our personal information are so out of touch". We are talking to you from experience.

the isthecatcute blog is a very good and genuinely helpful blog and im not dissing it AT ALL but some people really cannot think for themselves. there will be a cat that is perfectly fine sitting on a floor/being normal and there will be like. 8 people mentioning that blog in the notes like "OMG IS THE CAT SITTING WEIRD????? 😭" and then isthecatcute will reblog the post like "hi. yes the cat is fine and is just sitting on the floor"

I don’t really think this is the crisis this post is making it out to be. People are definitely going a little far at times, but the point of the cat blog is to educate people about cat behavior, and a direct effect of that is people realizing that a lot of what they thought they knew was wrong. If this results in people swinging too hard to the other end, the end result is people trying to learn more about cat behavior, which is good for cats even if it can cause inconvenience and absurdity for the people doing that education.

Another side effect is that the blog has good examples of happy, healthy cat behavior to set next to bad examples, which means people have a good reference point to learn from.

next person i see on the dash using "transandrophobia" or whatever is gettin fuckin BIT

IT'S NOT REAL!!!! I'M ACTIVELY GONNA COME FOR YOUR KNEES IT'S JUST TRANSPHOBIA YOU FUCKIN CLOWNS

Have you considered: transmascs having a word for their experiences and oppression does not hurt anyone and as someone who is not transmasc you don't get a say in this?

Because if not I really think you need to step back and think super hard about why a marginalized group having a name for their oppression is so upsetting to you.

I don’t get why you’re so upset over people coining a word for the oppression they face op

You do get that the transphobia trans men face isn’t necessarily the same as the transphobia trans women or nb people face, right? And that like… yeah, there actually is a sort of misandry marginalized men face for being marginalized men??

Like, disabled men are more considered gross and lazy than just infantilized. Poc men are considered dangerous and aggressive. Gay men are considered predatory, etc etc.

You… did notice this, right op?

Don't bother, they'd rather double down on their transphobia than not talk over a group about their own oppression. Transphobes gonna transphobe ¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯

The notes are a battle between angry Star Wars fans, and angry Game Of Thrones fans.

Addendum; there is a distinction between subversion that still makes sense and supports the story, themes, and characters, and subversion that is just for cheap shock on the moment. In writing, it’s always important to ask oneself whether a twist or shift in direction is the former or the latter.

Also in my experience you can literally spell out your subversion in flashing neon letters and people will still be surprised by it, so you can still get the surprise while still having it make sense for the story

Did anyone else have an obscenely dangerous childhood activity? Ours was climbing the beams in the abandoned glass factory.

I’m glad dodge rock is a universal childhood pastime.

I love all of these, but this one is my favorite.

[id: a reply from @smartfastjunior reading: “me n my friends used to dig holes in the ground and sleep in them” end id]

When I was a kid me and my dad and my brother would go out to the sand pits. Which is a place where dirt gets dumped from quarries and if you need dirt for some reason you could go and just pitch it into your truck bed and take it home with you. It was free dirt in huge piles. Have you ever seen a big pile of dirt and you were like "I need to take my shoes off and climb that right now immediately" well. These were dirt piles the size of a moderately big house and they were just THERE. For anyone to do whatever.

Anyway my dad and brother would go out to the sand pits to do some shooting and while they did that I would climb the house-sized piles of dirt.

DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN TO CEREAL!!!

Listen in the past the poor have had to improvise cheap food the rich never wanted as a means to survive. And over the many years of innovation made the food taste good until eventually the rich where like: “Oh hay you actually like that garbage? Why on earth would you like it?” Then they try it, love it, start buying it, and then drive the price up so much it becomes a luxury good.

They do this and its devastating, the food typically never becomes affordable again. It don’t matter how cheap the foo dis to produce, it doesn’t matter if there is almost no meat on the bone or its super difficult to eat and messy. Once the poor discover how to make some bit of cheap food taste good, the rich take it away via driving the price of it up.

THEY DID THIS TO RIBS.

Ribs were garage meat. Just look at them, there is hardly any meat on the bone, you have to eat them by hand usually, and they are messy. They where an undesirable cheap source of junk meat. But the poor being the poor made them taste good. (Because they don’t have much to choose from.) The rich discovered the meals the poor made with them and decided they liked ribs too. People discovered they could sell a few ribs to rich people and make way more money then selling lots of ribs to poor people and the price was driven up.

DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN TO CEREAL!!!

They did the same to brisket.  You used to be able to get brisket for less than a dollar a pound, which meant you could get a twenty pound brisket fairly cheaply.  And then you smoked it, sliced it, and had meat for weeks if not a full month.  And it was tasty.  I grew up eating brisket at least once a month because my family could afford it.

It was a cheap meat because no rich person looks at the dangly part of the neck of a cow and goes ‘ooh, that looks tasty!’.

But then Food Network started showcasing things like barbecued brisket.  Rich people started showing up at places that weren’t just Rib Crib to get their barbeque.  And the price of brisket went up.  A lot.

I regularly see it for over five dollars a pound in stores now.  And while yeah, that might not seem like a lot when you’re talking only a pound or two of meat, brisket is normally sold in ten to twenty pound sizes.  It’s become completely unaffordable to the people that made it delicious.

Sushi used to be really cheap, too, until it became ‘trendy’.  Guess why you’re now paying twelve dollars for your order of California rolls?  Because rich people discovered something that poor people had been eating for ages.

Noticed the prices of fajita meat, chicken thighs, or ham hocks has gone up recently?  You guessed it.  Rich people are taking our food and now we’re scrambling to afford the things that we grew up eating.

Lobster is a perfect example of this phenomenon.  For hundreds of years, lobster was regarded as a sort of insect larvae from the depth of the sea. It had zero appeal as a “luxury food” until people living in NY and Boston developed a taste for it. Before the 19th century, it was considered a “poverty food” or used as fertilizer and bait - some household servants specified in employment agreements that they would not eat lobster more than twice a week. It was also commonly served at prisons, which tells you something about prison food.

Only by cleverly marketing lobster as an indulgence for the privileged made it cost so much. It became a vehicle for enormous profit spawning a multi-billion dollar global industry in the process. This mythical affection for lobster flesh - not its practical value in terms of taste, nutrition, or any other reasonable consideration - drives its value.

LMAO. Wait.

Anyone else’s eye twitchin?

Food gentrification is a long standing practice and it’s some of the most evil shit I can think of. It’s why I refuse for example as someone living in the US to buy things with Quinoa in them. It is specifically pricing an indigenous population out of their prime staple food. It’s a horrific invasion of one of the final requirements of staying alive.

Chicken wings. My mom gripes about this every time we’re at the store because they were cheap, garbage meat all her life until Buffalo wings or whatever came along. Her favorite part of the chicken, lol, and now they’re a luxury buy which she never indulges in.

Guys

Ramen and sushi were street food

hi hello we need food just for the next few days <3

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Easy. Get rid of 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, & 9