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BEANSPLOSION

@patar-fuifui / patar-fuifui.tumblr.com

Switch InGame name: らc⌾ひrgモB∞M || i.e. SukajiSplats || [art tag: #patar's doodles] || 27 year old squid that draws a lot of video game characters (MAINLY Sonic & Splatoon) || dinosaurs are cool 😎 || Scourge the Hedgehog's a lil bitch and I still love him
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assiraphales

men in black still holds up so well imo the jaded old man getting partnered with an insubordinate rookie (and it works bc they’re both fucking insane). the lore. the creepy cockroach alien wearing a human as a suit & planning world domination. the kitty and his lil necklace. the wazzzzzzzzup aliens & talking pug. the special effects and pre digital haze. the quote where k says “fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the earth was the center of the universe. five hundred years ago, everybody knew the earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. imagine what you'll know tomorrow”

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ordered pizza from a small local place and they didnt actually cut it so i've chosen to revert to a wild animal and begin ripping it apart instead of just using a knife to portion slices

absolutely visceral experience. food is so much more satisfying when you have to fight it. i may be feral

i am not proud to say this but that pizza lasted fifteen minutes. i normally am not that gluttonous, but this goes beyond glutton. there was gluttony and wrath. a whirlwind of sauce, cheese, and pepperoni, all atop a flatbread that was shred apart by my own hands due to the neglect of another

in that moment i was wild. i was free. i understood the simplest joys in life. the joy of eating and manifesting my own destiny

been reflecting on this all day and the unsliced pizza experience honestly ruled. i think everyone should try it sometime or another. you have not truly lived until you just absolutely obliterated a pizza in such a feral manner

is this you

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mortalmab

My best friend and I have this tradition we call “chicken dinner” where we get a rotisserie chicken, lay it on a tarp, start on opposite ends of the tarp, and on the count of three we both run at the chicken and start ripping into it with our bear hands. We will be on our knees fighting for the best pieces of meat, ripping into the chicken with our faces, and it is the most viscerally delicious chicken I have ever had in my life. Grease gets everywhere. We have to do this outside. We have to tie our hair in buns beforehand.

You have never known the joy of food until you are lunging at your friend to rip the best part of the chicken out of their hand, rolling around on the tarp, stuffing it in your face before they can retaliate, and you realize “holy shit did I just growl?” And then you realize they are doing it too.

The chicken gets decimated. It’s absolutely destroyed. We aren’t allowed back inside until we have been hosed down. It’s the best.

Oh ye of little faith.

People across the street looking through the blinds, "Harold! Harold come quick, they're doing the chicken thing again!"

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fayallir
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I'm curious. Reblog this if you know how to cook

I don’t even care if it’s macaroni, ramen or those little bowls you stick in the microwave. Please, I need reassurance that most of the population on tumblr WOULDN’T STARVE TO DEATH if their parents couldn’t fix them food or they couldn’t go out to eat. 

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You guys do know you're supposed to reblog things, right

"well i like this post but i'm worried my followers might not" fuck your followers. The entire point of tumblr is to cause irreparable psychic damage to your followers. We are locked in mortal combat on the astral plane. You must win. You Must Win. You Must Destroy Them.

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