[Insert comedy here]

blue hour

shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

‘You better not be ninth doctor green screen lightning kill yourself when i get there’

Me:

wait you understand that kinks are ok because they're fantasies that make you happy right? you all get that you don't need to have trauma for your kinks to be okay? right? like none of you think i witnessed a tragic accident on the pool toy assembly line right?

like "some people work through their personal issues with kink" was a good first step for some of the class that were struggling but i think now we're ready for "things that don't hurt anyone and make people happy are okay even if you personally think it's icky"

BECAUSE ROUGE THE BAT DRAWN AS WIDE AS SHE IS TALL WITH TITS TO MATCH KILLED MY GRANDMA, OKAY?

Why Wayne got socks in the jacuzzi

those are his hooves you bitch

happy 10 years of those are his hooves you bitch

why the FUCK am i still on here

u know those mutuals who you are like silent buddies with and you never talk to each other but you reblog each others stuff and when you see them on you’re dash you’re like yooooo thats my bud!! 

thing that kids say sometimes when they don't like you

Magnus fandom, 2016: We're horny for this lady made of worms!

Me: Huh. Unexpected, I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Magnus fandom, 2024: We're horny for this guy made of needles!

Me: Of course you are, my children. Be free.

Magnus fandom 2024: We're horny for this bulbous oozing clown man!

Me: I think 95% of your are being facetious, but the true 5% can go with god.

Magnus fandom, just now: We're horny for a member of the British Aristocracy!

Me: Gross. No. Absolutely not. Sick freaks the lot of you. I am officially kinkshaming. You disgust me.

Magnus fandom, 2016: We're horny for this lady made of worms!

Me: Huh. Unexpected, I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Magnus fandom, 2024: We're horny for this guy made of needles!

Me: Of course you are, my children. Be free.

Magnus fandom 2024: We're horny for this bulbous oozing clown man!

Me: I think 95% of your are being facetious, but the true 5% can go with god.

Magnus fandom, just now: We're horny for a member of the British Aristocracy!

Me: Gross. No. Absolutely not. Sick freaks the lot of you. I am officially kinkshaming. You disgust me.

Eh, the Elias thing happened so gradually that I acclimatised to it, like a frog in boiling water. But also, I understand why if you've never actually encountered them you think aristocracy just translates to "old, rich and british", but it really doesn't. It's hard to articulate if you've never actually met any, but they are just deeply unsexy on an almost spiritual level. A revulsion of the soul.

no your honor I absolutely can make my case like an adult. first things first, fuck the defendant and fuck his family too. secondly,

shlock brain hurt

not his name.

shamrock going proper mental innit

not even his name.

tuck him in Tuesday

tuck him in Tuesday once again

another tuck him in Tuesday is here

Tuck him out 😈

WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM

those fuck ass animatronics would not have stood a chance against this absolute god

reminder that coming up with some fake little dudes and creating intricate storylines in your head is a completely free and fun way to pass the time and the government can't stop you

today’s date is the 3rd? what’s next, the 4th? the 5th? the minor fall, the major lift? 

Could a homosexual lend me, an asexual, a single use of the word flaming?

YOU have obtained:

I, a flaming asexual, need someone to please call the fire department. It is an emergency.

Perfectly executed joke, no notes