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let the ocean swallow up our sins

@holydean / holydean.tumblr.com

i threw stones at the stars but the whole sky fell
// benji. 22. artist. he/him. i draw sabriel a lot. commissions are open!
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i have a top surgery consultation in 4 days!! and i am terrified !!!

#like it is incredibly exciting but im so hesitant to be excited#because there are so many factors at play#the surgeon said they are scheduling surgeries in late 2024#which feels like a long time to wait for a consult in january#but at the same time not knowing that for sure is making it so hard to plan out the rest of the year#if you've had top surgery and feel comfortable talking about it pls dm me i am v anxious haha#not spn#personal
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Anonymous asked:

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I hope thing improve for you soon ❤

thank you kindly my sweet ❤️

#anon#asks
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instantlyexhaustedowl asked:

Hey, saw you are not doing well. I dunno how to help you, but i can send you this. Have a cute sleeping dog.

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thank you very much ❤️ this is an adorable dog, thank you for being kind and reaching out. i appreciate you ❤️

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just feels like i've done absolutely everything i could to cope and im still in the same place. still the same person, still zero achievements, zero accomplishments. feels like i am wasting away.

i have tried for so many years to be optimistic, but im circling the drain now. in the end of it all i come back to the haunting realization that maybe none of this ever gets any better.

#idk how to do a read more on mobile im sorry#sorry to be whining#i have just been struggling a lot lately#i don't know who i am anymore#not spn#benji whines#i wish i could just float away
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Anonymous asked:

Check your ko-fi, my friend.

i literally cannot even begin to thank you so much for your donation. ❤ you have genuinely saved me ❤ please let me know how i can ever begin to repay you. thank you so, so much.

#not spn#asks#anon
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just broke my cintiq tablet that was my only means of work and supporting myself. it feels like my whole life is over and i am crushed.

if you're waiting on art from me, it'll be a hot minute until i can get it to you. i appreciate your patience and understanding.

#i know it doesnt seem like a big deal and it sounds like im just being dramatic#but i have no way of working now#im so fucking destroyed#i cannot process this#not spn#benji whines#time to just cry for the rest of the night#i hate myself so much
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reblogged
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gocatboygo

valentine’s day asks!

  1. do you have a crush on anyone?
  2. what’s your favorite candy?
  3. favorite love song?
  4. what was your first kiss like?
  5. what was your last kiss like?
  6. sexual/romantic orientation?
  7. do you prefer poems or love letters?
  8. favorite fanfic trope?
  9. have you ever been in love?
  10. favorite milkshake flavor?
  11. dinner dates or brunch dates?
  12. favorite flowers?
  13. favorite perfume/cologne?
  14. favorite candle scent?
  15. what’s your ideal first date?
  16. favorite love story?
  17. what’s the most attractive thing a person could wear?
  18. chocolate, vanilla, or red velvet?
  19. snow, rain, or sun?
  20. sweetest romantic memory?
  21. favorite dating sim (and favorite character)?
  22. fictional crushes?
  23. what’s your dream wedding like?
  24. what makes you blush?
  25. do you believe in love at first sight?
  26. do you believe in soulmates?
  27. denim jackets, leather jackets, or bomber jackets?
  28. what’s your sign?
  29. are you single?
  30. do you prefer to charm, or be charmed?
  31. guitar or piano?
  32. favorite romcom (or any romantic movie)?
  33. do you fall in love easily?
  34. valentine’s decorations: yay or nay?
  35. would you prefer to propose or be proposed to? what’s your dream proposal?
  36. cloud gazing or star gazing?
  37. do you like to dance?
  38. what’s your OTP?
  39. kittens or puppies?
  40. coffee, hot chocolate, or tea?
  41. favorite soda?
  42. do you prefer gazing wistfully out the window or lying dramatically over the sofa?
  43. favorite ABBA song?
  44. fuck/marry/kill? (anons name 3 people of your choice)
  45. favorite pajamas?
  46. favorite liquor?
  47. do you think about love a lot?
  48. a walk in the park or a walk on the beach?
  49. hand kisses or nose kisses?
  50. what’s your dreamhouse?
#ask games#not spn#happy valentines day!!!
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