Avatar

Russell Family

@marriedandttc / marriedandttc.tumblr.com

Leah Rae (29). Stephen Chase (32). Married on 12/13/14. Our love story began on 9/21/12. It became a little more permanent with a promise of forever on 11/11/12. Infertile AF: 4 rounds of IVF.
Avatar
reblogged

damn girl are you a wild animal being held in captivity šŸ˜ because you are just pacing around rooms nonstop and taking eye contact as a sign of agression

Avatar

I am hoarding advent calendars like a hamster these days.

Opening them daily is going to be a time commitmentā€¦

BUT I WONT STOP.

Avatar
Avatar
carveredlund

itā€™s getting colder which means coffee shops are going to get busier so I am once again wishing everyone who is rude to cafe/drive thru workers a very make your own damn coffee

Avatar

Ten years ago today I got engaged to Stephen after knowing him a whopping total of 7 weeks.

Everyone thought I was insane.

Which, I was, to be honest. But it worked out well.

Avatar

Our baby shower was this past July.

We were absolutely overwhelmed with over 50 guests traveling from six different states to celebrate our little miracle. We filled a board room at a local hotel, ate a plethora of treats, ate some catered food, and created so many memories.

To be joyously surrounded by so many loved ones and friends after such a long wait still feels like a dream.

Avatar

The road to Auroraā€¦

On September 6th we checked in for induction at 10:00 pm and began medication around midnight thanks to lots of paperwork! We initially thought I wasnā€™t responding well to the pitocin because I never felt contractionsā€¦ but with the sun up and my wits about me I discovered the pain Iā€™d been feeling in my back all night long was actually back labor and we were making progress! On September 7th at 8:00 am Dr. Eastman came in to check on me. I was dilated to about a 3 which was some progress. I consented to a breaking of the waters and they inserted an internal monitor. I loved the internal monitor, it was so much more reliable. The entire night before was spent readjusting my straps and monitors and it was really tiresome after a while. Following the water breaking I called my doula and she booked it up to come help us! She arrived just in time as contractions picked up following the breaking. Thanks to the internal monitor I had an easy time moving around (just had to carry my IV pole) so we were able to labor in many positions. We began with me bending over at the side of the bed and my doula taught Stephen about counter pressure. He spent the entire time rubbing my back through the back labor - while utilizing some peppermint lotion! This helped a lot as I was battling a headache. When I got tired of that position we moved to the birthing ball and I did some bouncing and some rolling, Stephen still helping my back. And the last switch up we tried was hands and knees on the bed, leaning over/using a peanut ball for support. I think the hands and knees was my favorite! But by this time Iā€™d been going at it for a couple hours and was exhausted so I took some time to lay in bed with the peanut ball. And I have to sayā€¦ I am incredibly proud of myself. Iā€™ve always said I have no pain tolerance and that I couldnā€™t do this part. My goal was to make it to 4 CM before the epidural but I didnā€™t believe I could. But when it came time I focused on my breathing, relaxed every muscle in my body, and just closed my eyes. I was silent and didnā€™t speak with anyone or make a sound. It was just me and my body, and I did it! When the pain reached a point I could no longer tolerate without some level of panic I requested my epidural. This was a step I feared! Getting one and using it was always a part of my plan but Iā€™d watched videos on how itā€™s done and I was terrified! My anesthesiologist came in and blew every expectation out of the water. He was fast but organized, explained every touch before he did it, and got it in with ease. I couldnā€™t believe how simple he made it for me. They laid me back in bed and began waiting on the medicine to work. My blood pressure tolerated it well and I was grateful for the relief. It took away almost all the pelvic pressure and decreased the back labor pain, though never took it away. I continued to labor with the epidural for quite some time. My nurse and my doula worked together and changed my position every 30 minutes for hours upon hours. I used the peanut ball, the stirrups, and various seated bed positions to get baby to drop. We discovered the dilation and effacement was going great, but her station was not changing. No matter how close we got down south she wasnā€™t finding her way down.

Iā€™m proud to report that all the changing of positions did work and by 8:00 pm I was able to push! I had my doula and Stephen working together on holding my legs for me and I got to work pushing. Baby started off with a posterior face, which made it extra difficult. About an hour into pushing I told them I needed a break and that I felt like I was going to pass out - and then my body began to shake out of my control, I lost nearly all color, and Stephen informed me that my lips turned purple. My blood sugar bottomed out and I was not doing well. They quickly changed my IV from regular lactated ringers to a kind with dextrose in it to help me, and I ate a sucker. After about 15 minutes of this I recovered and went straight back into pushing. We restarted pushing and eventually got the baby past the pelvic bone. It was a glorious momentā€¦ until we discovered my temperature was nearly 102. Everything came to a halt while they gathered me some Tylenol and two kinds of IV antibiotics. The fear was that laboring so long after having the waters manually broken had introduced infection to the uterus. While they took care of me they cleaned up beneath me and we took notice that the amniotic fluid now presented with meconium, so we really wanted baby to get out. With my temperature coming down and the antibiotics started we returned to pushing. I got a few in and the baby began to show signs of distress. As it was explained to me the heart decelerating during a push is to be expected to some extent but what theyā€™re watching for is it to go back up AND have variance - wiggles in the heart monitor instead of it being flat when it went up. Auroraā€™s heart was presenting flat after every return, nearly no variance at all. We decided to roll me onto my side and try laboring that way to get pressure off my blood vessels. We gave it a few solid pushes and saw no improvement - and things went south when my own heart began to act up too and my pulse was lingering around 130-150.

Dr. Holtz took a temporary pause and came up to talk with me. ā€œYou are a rockstar. Youā€™ve put every ounce of your energy into pushing and laboring. You did everything absolutely right and Iā€™ve tried every position I can. But you told me all you cared about was that you and baby are healthy and safe at the end of this. Itā€™s my professional opinion that the way we ensure that is a c-section.ā€ I fully agreed. I was exhausted and in pain. My baby was in distress, and my own body seemed to begin following suit. She called for an emergency c-section and everything happened very fast. Within 20 minutes I was on the table and they were working miracles to get us all safe.

Aurora was born at 11:32 pm and came out screaming - beautiful lungs on that girl. Stephen and I locked eyes and we both began to cry. He stayed with me for a short while before he left to go check on our girl. She got apgar scores of 9, which they said they rarely give out! She returned to the room pretty quickly with her dad while they got me stitched up.

At the end of the day it was 12 hours of active labor, 2.5 hours of pushing, and one c-section.

I feel like Iā€™ve been run over by a steam roller today and I canā€™t do much. I havenā€™t been able to feed, change, or lift the baby. I do get to hold her with pillow support and Stephen putting her in my arms. Itā€™s very defeating, but hopefully Iā€™ll make enough progress the next few days or experience some of her first days as an active parent and partner.

That said, I have no regrets about my birth experience. I got to at least try everything I was interested in and experience a lot of parts of birth. Unmedicated contractions, medicated contractions, pushing, and a c! I felt supported and heard every step of the way, and always believed I was fully in charge. I feel horrible physically but so empowered and capable emotionally. It could not have gone better.

Avatar

Pregnancy after 7 years of infertility was a lot, but the greatest experience of my life. I was incredibly fortunate to have a fairly complication free experience. We had some issues with fetal movement towards the end but with frequent NSTs we were comfortable going to 40+6 weeks gestation. My symptoms were mild and I was able to enjoy every trimester.

Our only really big scare was me contracting COVID during my 38th week of pregnancy and Stephen contracting it from me despite our best efforts at isolation. Going into labor with a positive case myself, or my partner, would really impact if he could be present with me during the labor. It was incredibly worrisome but we both recovered without too much drama and passed the 14 days before I went into labor.

Avatar

I guess itā€™s been a while since I logged in.

IVF #4 was extra specialā€¦

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.