the gays, on june 1st:

I’ve long said you can’t trust straight historians

straight ppl: *literally defiling a corpse* theres no historical evidence of lgbt ppl sweaty (:

i love that we and cats share pareidolia (seeing patterns where they dont exist), but instead of seeing faces in everyday objects like us, they see snakes

that computer cord? snake. string? small snake. cucumber? short fat straight snake

snake pareidolia is one of the strongest things in human minds too! people report freezing mid-stride before being consciously aware of a snake in front of them, and the same happens with coiled rope, etc. in humans and other primates. it’s even been proposed that the need to detect snakes was a factor in the development of primates’ insanely good color eyesight

It’s because snakes are wonderful and we must stop and admire them at any cost

This is why I don’t tell 99% people im bisexual

I love how gay people do it too. Just… really? You’re literally saying the same shit to bisexuals that straight people say to you, and you don’t see the hypocrisy? 

If youre biphobic or hate bisexuals, fucking unfollow me, for serious.

^^^

If youre biphobic or hate bisexuals, fucking unfollow me, for serious.

Why is this a thing like really? Homosextual people of ALL beings should understand that you like what you like and if the answer multiple choice then that’s just more love to go around non?

BY REBLOGGING THIS YOU ARE SAYING THAT YOUR BLOG IS COMPLETELY ACCEPTING OF BI FOLKS!!! BISEXUAL PEOPLE ARE PART OF THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY AND IF YOU DISAGREE, PLEASE UNFOLLOW ME

ALL bi people are welcome here! No exceptions.

Everyone is safe here with me <3

Everyone is safe here with me

Honestly if you are against any sexuality please unfollow me, goodbye 👋🏻

reblog the shit out of this

WTF Why people spread so much negativity… We are all humans, no matter of gender, race or sexual orientation!

Bisexual people are valid

You can GoFundMe Austin Perine

https://www.gofundme.com/show-love-fight-hunger?utm_source=internal&utm_medium=email&utm_content=campaign_link_t&utm_campaign=welcome

“Feeding the homeless is the highlight of my life.” I’m all verklempt. #BlackExcellence

So AMAZING and sweet!!

I’m on my bed crying on Saturday morning

This baby bout to grow up and change the world.

Zzz

Me:

“Shh, it’s alright,” the villain said. “You’re doing beautifully and I’m so proud of you. But that’s enough now. It was cruel of them to make you fight me - you could never have won. It’s not your fault.”

The ancient and powerful villain may have had a calm and gentle face as he spoke, but he was furious, not at the hero, but the gods for continually sending kids and teenagers to fight their battles.

new d&d character

billy gnoll

piano man……….

More unreasonable D&D magic items: an enchanted ring that appears to grant the wearer occasional strokes of plausibly deniable good luck. What it actually does is confer upon the wearer the near-religious loyalty of a mob of small, extremely stealthy goblin-like creatures who believe that it’s their sacred duty to help the ring’s bearer without allowing their involvement to become known. This works well enough in wilderness or dungeon; problems start to arise when the wearer gets back to town for some downtime, as the ring’s minions have never been outside the dungeon and have no idea how civilisation works, but still feel obliged to help.

i love these goblins and will defend them with my life.

I want to hug them and make them little hats

Ring of Nac Mac Feegle

Size comparison of Y’gathok, the Ceaseless Hunger and Bjorn, our level 20 Goliath Barbarian.

Hey quick question: why the FUCK do you have that

Imagine, from out of nowhere, your dm casually slapping this thing down on the table like any other encounter.

“Yeah, the fight will start in a sec, uh…I’ll give inspiration to whomever helps me get this fucking box out of my car.”

https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/7asxci/oc_ygathok_the_ceaseless_hunger_final_boss_of_our/ This is the reveal of this ridiculousness during their game

Please watch this reveal video it’s kickass

FUCK ME  the reveal video

“CHRIS??????”

“I don’t think our plan is going to work.” 

[MONSTROUS ROAR]

A concept: mermaids in wheelchairs

Another: shapeshifters with stretch marks

Religious vampires trying to find ways to balance their ideologies with their needs

Sirens learning sign language so they can communicate without enchanting anyone

Disabled fairies who can’t fly pushing for accessibility

Spirits helping save people from fires and other natural disasters because they can access areas too dangerous for the living

Dragons becoming foster parents and providing super safe homes for “hordes” of children until they grow up

Female werewolves with facial hair and body hair not letting anyone make them feel bad about it

Fae snatching children from abusive homes and raising them in safety while the changeling wreaks havoc

Liberated genies using their power to fight for human rights

Witchy cooking shows where witches try to make specific potions or find creative magical solutions to problems

Psychic psychologists and medical doctors who are able to figure out exactly how to help even if their patient is non-verbal, young, or afraid of being honest because they’re with an abuser

Psychic teachers knowing just what to do to help students with learning disabilities

Yes please. 

I just slammed the reblog button so hard my phone broke.

Hell hound service animals

*pounds fist on table* HELL HOUND SERVICE ANIMALS

Ive never played dnd before but if I ever get to be a dm I’m going to present it as a serious game the first 2 or 3 sessions no funny sounding names no nothing its all high fantasy and serious before completely shattering it in the worst way possible

explain

Sure, imagine Your party stuck in a cave fighting wild catlike creatures or something alike.

The creatures have blocked the way out And the only other way out seems to be a steady but shallow stream of water going deep inside the cave. You are losing the Fight but then you look up at The entrance And you see a silhouette of a man in expensive looking clothing looking down on you. You plead for help but he doesnt respond, instead he starts charging a spell Which makes the water coming from outside cover the caves Floor. The spell Weaves Around Your party but is starting to tug at the creatures. When you look up at the man you can see his face because of the glow coming from his hands, he looks middle aged, human with dark skin and short grey hair. His unexpressive eyes suddenly turn bright red as he says in a calm yet powerfull voice:

“Perish.”

All the animals in the cave get swooped away by the water, letting out one final cry as they get carried into the abyss. he slowly walks to Your weakened party. He stops right in front of you.

“Hail And Well met, my name is Barack, descendent of the house of White.”

THIS IS THE ULTIMATE POWER MOVE

Random Potion Generator

Use this series of tables to come up with random potions! You can use this as a DM to describe an unidentified magic potion that you give your players. As a player, you can use this when you create potions as a spellcaster or someone proficient in Alchemist’s Tools. Use this with the Alchemy Profession Guide!

image credit: Vera Velichko

Potion Vessel

Every potion has to be held in something! Roll on the following tables to generate a container for your potion including its material, shape, and its seal or stopper.

Potion Vessel Shape

Potion Vessel Material

Potion Seal/Stopper

image credit: Zoltan Boros and Gabor Szikszai

Potion Description

Roll on the following tables to create a random liquid! If you want your potion to be identifiable, try adding a telling ingredient to float in the potion. For instance, a Giant’s Strength potion can have a giant’s toe inside, while a Potion of Fly might have an angel’s feather within. A healing potion might have some medicinal herbs floating inside.

Potion Color

Potion Smell

Potion Taste

How it’s Made

Randomly describe how to create the potion. Roll twice or more on the Ingredients table. Then roll once for each ingredient beyond the first on the Alchemical Processes table to determine how each ingredient is added to the first ingredient. It might be mixed in a special way or treated in a unique way before it’s added. 

I should note this is for D&D fluff and narration and is not based in science. Dissolving Aqua Fortis and Mercury in alcohol will not make a healing potion so do not drink it!

Ingredients

Alchemical Process

Potion Effects

There are many existing potions, but I feel like a lot of existing spells could be made into potions. So, I added some. I based them loosely on spell scrolls but tried to move the better ones to higher rarities because potions are objectively better than scrolls (anyone can drink a potion, only casters can use scrolls).

If you roll for a potion randomly as part of a treasure hoard, be sure it’s of an appropriate rarity for the players.

on the topic of rewriting racist d&d narratives

it takes work, yes!

it’s worth it. for both you and your players, but especially for new players who can see the game in different ways than you

examples I’ve written that you should feel free to use:

-orcs: rather than give in to the weird “tribal savages who fight all the time,” consider connecting orcs and their inate strength/constitution to the earth. in my most recent campaign setting, orcs are descended from a human champion who bested an earth primordial; the primordial, impressed with their strength, blessed them and their descendents with powerful tusks and a greater constitution.

-drow: instead of the entire drow narrative being “they’re dark skinned and bad because they betrayed the fair skinned elves and their gods,” consider playing up their connection to spiders. perhaps they worshiped a spider God who gave them the ability to blend into their darkened surroundings. if you’re married to their current aesthetic appearance, take care to present multiple drow societies that have different outlooks; not a homogenous race of black skinned slavers. consider pigmentless drow, who’ve lost all skin color because they never see the light of day. drow who use echolocation? distancing your drow from the bad connotations carried by the current zeitgeist is a useful endeavor

-include. colored. elves. in. your. game

-drop the ‘tribal’ aesthetic and the connotations that goblins and other monstrous races have. it’s lazy

-focus less on race and more on societies; a society can be evil or good, but a race cannot

-consider that fantasy races have no reason to conform to any gendered structures (especially our current human binary). dwarvish societies who express their varied and fluid genders through beard braiding. elvish societies who reproduce asexually. don’t limit yourself to what you can relate to from a 21st century human perspective

it takes a bit of elbow grease to decolonize your d&d, and the process is never done, but in my own experience, it’s only ever lead to more innovative and engaging experiences!

Quality content right here