dont say nothin just reblog if she looks like who you know we all think she looks like

my friend just sent me this i’m cRYING inspired by @satanicslushie ’s “baz in jondoms” post

outlining a snowbaz fanfic with @aggressivegiggling

sometim every single day i’m doing stuff like making food or doing homewerk and i sit and i think “dang you know what would be more fun than this......... writing outlines with a satanic slushie” 

and it’s the tru bc i really have fun wrtigting these 

Keep reading

ya

You’ve heard of Baz in jeans, now get ready for 

Baz in jondoms 

sometimes i stop and i need to sit down and i need to think about your posts for a minute 

art student AU prompts

MASTERLIST

- “hi you left your sketchbook in one of the classes we have together and I meant to give it back like a week ago but everything in here is the most beautiful drawing I’ve ever seen” au

- “uh it’s nice to meet you but I have to draw someone for an assignment that’s due in about thirty minutes” au

- “you’re a sculptor and I’m a watercolorist and we just made a bet to switch mediums and the first one that gives up has to do a portrait of the other and??maybe kiss the other???” au

- “watch where the hell you’re going with your extra extra large canvas, you nearly hit me- wait oh my god you’re so talented is that a jellyfish oil painting?” au

- “I’m just a photography major but you’re a painter I guess and you’re asking me to be your model did you just comPLIMENT MY BODY” au

- “I came to class today thinking I was just going to do nude sketches of a model but you are actually a goddess and I’m so sorry I spent more time staring than drawing” au

- “i was just simply walking back to my seat with a fresh lump of clay and I wasn’t paying attention and my elbow just took off the head of your cartoon influenced sculpture of abraham lincoln I am so sorry” au

- “I ran out of my favorite paint while working on my final project and came all the way to michaels to get a replacement tube because I have no choice and you just happen to be the cashier that I rant to about absolutely everything and you look terrified” au

- “listen I know this is probably the third time I’ve been back to this print shop but I really don’t like this type of glossy finish on my prints or maybe I just think you’re cute, you tell me” au

- “you’re the goddamn loud mouth that ALWAYS goes into so much detail when we do peer critiquing but when my piece is the one in question you’RE QUIET??” au

- “I was bored out of my mind during this color theory lecture but I notice you looking at me, you keep glancing between me and your sketchbook WAIT are you doing what I think you’re doing” au

- “I was just doing some watercolor in my moleskine but oh my god I just split my water cup all over your sketchbook I’m freaking out and apologizing over and over and you’re saying that it’s okay and you’re rubbing my thigh oh man” au

- “okay when I said I would help you with your photography assignment by being your model I diDN’T KNOW YOU’D WANT ME TO GO INTO AN ABANDONED BUILDING THATS APPARENTLY HAUNTED?” au

YES... Thank you. These are all brilliant and I love them and I'm crying

2am fanfic

@aggressivegiggling and I wrote a fanfic at 2am  @skittles8059 pls read this 

Keep reading

thank for writing this with me, nerd 

do you guys want to hear my favorite knock-knock joke

this got one like so i’m gonna tell it: knock knock who’s there isabel isabel who is a bell out of order? i had to knock

as the one person who liked it (I think), I feel obligated to reblog this A+ knock knock joke 

yes, thank you, you were in fact the person who liked it. i feel like not enough people have heard this joke and i thank you for reblogging it

Some kissing practice with Solangelo and Snowbaz ~please reblog if you like it~

Sweet Distractions (Day 2: Valentine’s Chocolate)

So, this is kind of late, and I’m sorry! But better late than never, right? Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this!

This is for @carryon-valentines

Summary: Penny goes out of town. Simon misses her, so Baz tries to take Simon’s mind off her. (Forgive me, I’m bad at summaries.)

Word Count: 729 

Warnings: None. 

For once, Penny wasn’t going to be complaining about Simon and Baz’s flirting. That Valentine’s day she was going to be visiting Micah. Simon was upset that she was leaving, but she told him, “Just consider it a Valentine’s Day gift. You and Baz get the whole flat to yourselves! But stay out of my room.”

She left two days before Valentine’s Day, and for two days Simon was all alone in his flat.

It felt more like two years than two days when Valentine’s Day finally arrived. Penny wouldn’t be back until Friday, but Valentine’s Day meant Baz.

Simon had never been more excited to go out. They spent that Valentine’s Day at a fancy restaurant eating overpriced food and ignoring stares from people who either thought they were another adorable couple or a disgusting pair, and then at Simon’s flat getting drunk and trading kisses.

It was the best Valentine’s Day Simon had ever had. Baz’s flat wasn’t too far away from Simon’s, but Simon had still missed him nearly as much as he was missing Penny.

On Valentine’s Day, kisses and hugs had been enough to distract him from her absence, but now it was February 15th, and he missed Penny like crazy. Fortunately, February 15th was no ordinary day. It was the official start of discount chocolate sales. Baz didn’t like seeing Simon upset, so, as a distraction, he suggested they go out and buy chocolate. With little protest, Simon got up and they made their way to the store.

Baz and Simon both had a sweet tooth. Still, two shopping carts full of old Valentine’s Day chocolate was a little excessive. They settled on three bags, one of which they ate on their way back home.

Simon and Baz ate their remaining candy until they were stuffed. They eventually ended up on the couch cuddling, and Baz taking advantage of the fact that Penny wasn’t there to complain about their flirting. “I love you more than cherry scones,” Simon whispered jokingly into Baz’s ear. Baz tried not to smile. “I’m glad,” he replied before kissing Simon’s cheek. “I didn’t want to be eaten.”

“Who said I wasn’t going to eat you?” Simon asked, tilting his head. Baz rolled his eyes. “Cannibalism is generally frowned upon, Snow. Besides, aren’t you full?”

Simon smirked before licking chocolate off Baz’s cheek. “Nope.”

Baz sighed. “Really?” he asked furrowing his eyebrows.

“You’re sweet,” Simon told him.

“No, you’re sweet, and it’s rubbing off on me,” Baz told him, as he wiped chocolate from the corner of Simon’s mouth with his thumb.

Simon squinted at him. “Only you can sound annoyed while complimenting someone.”

“Who said I was complimenting you,” Baz asked, raising an eyebrow. “That was a complaint. You’re sweetness is rubbing off and getting all over me. You’re ruining my image. No one wants to see a sweet, blood-sucking monster, Snow.”

Simon smiled. “Good thing you aren’t a monster then, huh?” he said before kissing Baz. Baz wanted to argue, he always did, but it was Valentine’s Day, or the day after anyway. It was an argument for another time. Instead, Baz kissed his boyfriend slowly and savored the warmth of his lips. Baz thought they tasted like chocolate and mint; he was sure his lips did as well. Simon’s sweetness really was rubbing off on him. Baz was thankful for that. Simon deserved all the sweetness that the world had to offer.

Simon pulled away slowly. His eyes were sleepy and full of everything Baz could ever ask for. Their lips were still so close, their noses were touching, and all Baz wanted was to kiss him again. Before he could, Simon asked, “Could you call me Simon today?”

Baz sighed. Simon. Simon, the boy of his dreams, didn’t hate him anymore. That on its own was incredible. But now he was holding Baz in his arms, looking into his eyes, and asking him to call him by his first name. Baz thought he might cry. He didn’t. If Simon wasn’t going to be sad about Penny, Baz wasn’t going to start crying about Simon’s name. His beautiful name.

Instead, he replied, “Your kisses are going to give me diabetes, Simon.”

“That’s more like it,” Simon said before kissing Baz again. It looked like kisses were going to be enough to distract Simon again after all.

chapter 61 from simon’s pov

And I’m holding his face

Because I want him to stop

I want him to stop saying all this

I want him to go back to Watford with me

I want to be home with him

His dark, grey eyes are

Dancing in the firelight

They’re beautiful, I think

Where did that thought come from?

He’s not beautiful.

He’s my enemy.

Okay, he is kind of beautiful.

Okay. Baz is beautiful and

It annoys the fuck out of me.

His mouth is so close

It’s sealed shut

And for a split second

I think about kissing him

I think about pushing his mouth open

With my own

I wonder if he’ll kiss me back

But then I remember

Who I am and who he is

And where we are

And I almost convince myself not to-

But he’s staring at my face

So intently

And for a second, unmistakably,

His eyes flick down to my lips.

“Simon…”

I don’t want him to go

I don’t want him to leave

And so I do it.

I kiss Baz.

I kiss him like there’s no tomorrow

Because I want to kiss him

Because he’s beautiful

And because he isn’t a monster

Because he isn’t my enemy

And because it just feels right.

His mouth is cold, cold, cold

But this kiss is full of heat

It’s nothing like what I’ve

Ever felt with Agatha.

It’s hotter,

It’s colder,

It’s a hundred times more intense.

And it feels right.

I am kissing Baz.

And he is kissing me.

What are we starting?

Crowley.

How things change.

*tearing up* nice

carry on AU where everything is the same except the front seat is for people who have been kidnapped by fucking numpties