"Read Banned Books" a new full page cartoon essay published in The New York Times Arts & Leisure section today.
A good day to reblog this, I just found out The Deep & Dark Blue is on another new ban list, this time in Colorado. Hooray.
Idea for an animated kid's movie/comedy.
So there's this dinosaur park that's a thinly veiled Jurassic Park knock-off (call it Cretaceous Island), and it's a bit of a toy story situation, in that the dinosaurs can talk and communicate when the humans aren't looking, mostly at night.
The dinos don't really want to break out since they like their cushy zoo lives and five-star treatment from the staff, so they're willing to get oggled by a bunch of twelve year olds to keep the food coming.
Out main characters are a T-Rex, two raptor sisters, and a wise old triceratops. The raptors are bored with their lives and long for adventure, the triceratops is a wise-old mentor figure, and the T-Rex is lonely since the park won't engineer any other T-Rex's for safety reasons.
Through magical shenanigans they get sent back to the actual Cretaceous period.
Now these pampered genetically engineered dinos have to survive in the savage dinosaur era. To underscore the differences between them, the future dinos are animated as pretty standard cartoon dinosaurs, a la Land Before Time, while the dinosaurs from the past are animated to be as scientifically accurate as possible.
The dinos go through shenanigans, amke friends in the past, evade predators, and eventually make their way home through magic portal stuff, except for the T-Rex who elects to stay behind since he's fallen for a female T-Rex he met in the past. His friends are sad to leave him behind, but go to the present anyway.
Back in the present, the dinos think nothing has really changed, but they find that the exhibit in the visitor's center, previously a single roaring T-Rex skeleton, has been replaced with two T-Rex's, famous for being found fossilized together called "The Deadly Lovers", and its their friend and the mate he found in the past. It ends on the bittersweet note.
people misunderstand what ‘gifted kid’ actually means but it’s ok it’s fine it’s cool it’s good
it’s not about actually being gifted, it’s about an initial higher scoring on standardized testing that means little to nothing or being good at learning in the way elementary and middle school wants you to, so you get marked as ‘advanced’. in reality, maybe you had faster development in certain areas, but the issue with being a gifted kid isn’t that “everyone told me I was so cool and special for reading and then I actually wasn’t :(” it’s “I wasn’t properly taught to handle things not coming easily to me, but the adults around me were counting on me not being a ‘difficult’ child in school.”
people who use it as some weird bragging method or interpret it that way are ignoring the way a lot of school systems force certain roles on students to simplify the learning process. If your kid doesn’t need to take notes to understand a science concept bc they get it naturally, well that’s good, but now you’re not teaching them how to take notes and they’re not learning that important soft skill. but because ‘gifted’ kids are easy and don’t show that they’re falling behind in learning in other categories that are harder to quantify, they eventually fall behind after that catches up to them. It’s about the failures of a one size fits all school system trying to compensate in the worst way possible.
And also the thing where ‘gifted’ kids are super likely to also be neuroatypical, which they don’t get screened for because they appear to be doing well in school. Or “You can’t be ADHD/autistic/etc, because you’re doing so well in school!”. Or being shamed for developing mental health issues/generally not being able to keep up with school work later, because you USED TO BE able to do it just fine.
Or the assumption that just because you can read well or you like math class, you’re somehow more EMOTIONALLY mature than your little kid brain is actually capable of being.
Or gifted kids whose parents and teachers put immense pressure on them to Do Great Things and Save The World and you’re like. “I’m 10 and I have no idea how to do that, but everyone is saying that’s my job?”.
This is the best “gifted kid” post out there. I never took notes until college because I didn’t have to, snd when it got challenging I had to literally teach myself note taking at age 18. It also fucks with your perception of asking for help - you’re advanced, you’re competent, you should be able to understand every topic easily. Asking for help/going to office hours/asking for a tutor feels like failing when you were praised in your early years for not needing to do that.
It's not an "abandoned" WIP, I didn't intentionally leave it in the forest to die and forget about it, it is a lost wip who wandered into the forest despite my pleas not to. I sit at the edge of the forest every day and hear it calling for help but there is nothing I can do. It is a haunting wip
Legends say that if you hold on to some of the lost WIP's trinkets while you wait, asking for it to come home whenever you hear it calling, that it will, one day, make it back to you
This isn't aimed at any one person, more of a general observation from my comments/inbox over the last few years, but the number of people who say things like "but that's normal" when I describe hypermobility compared to the number of times healthcare providers look at me like I'm a glitch in the matrix is a Ven diagram made up of a single circle at this point.
Like I feel like some people just aren't envisioning the things I'm describing properly and are imagining a normal range of motion, but I also think some of you might want to consider getting evaulated.
Especially when you send me messages like, "There's nothing wrong with me except for my debilitating joint pain, crippling exhaustion, and the fact that blood shoots out of my eyes once a month, but isn't it normal to be able to do X?"
When I talk to people (even family) about my own hypermobility issues, I like to use my rehab after breaking my leg and ankle as an example...
Finally, all healed up and time for physio, the physiotherapist wants to gauge the range of motion in my freshly healed ankle. She gets me to stand in front of a wall and press my knee forward until it touches. Now, how far back can my foot go, while remaining flat, before I can't touch my knee to the wall.
Okay. I can do that. I show her. She looks at me. I look at her.
"That's a perfectly normal range of motion... show me with your other ankle.... oooh! Normal range of motion for you is about twice what it is for the average person. Yeah, we're not going to be able to get you back to that with the broken ankle. But also, talk to your doctor about this, because it isn't normal to be that flexible in your joints."
[Doctor said it's not anything specific, I just have stupid weak tendons everywhere, so... yay?]
*gathers all of the people in the world who write the number 7 with a little dash in the center of it so I can study them like little critters and find out what makes them do that*
I saw it in a cartoon when I was little, and liked it. Have done it ever since.
My dad taught me to do it so it isn't mistaken as a 1 (same as putting a strike through my zeros so they aren't mistaken as 'o's)
Now, as a teacher, I wish there were little distinctive marks for each number so they are easily identifiable, no matter how bad a kid's writing is...
Seriously, 4s and 9s, 5s and 6s... you'd think they're distinctive enough, but nope!
I do love that some of my students have adopted and/or adapted the strikes for themselves. (One puts a little dot in the middle of her zeros. Adorable!)
I’m not the most eloquent writer, but I’ve had this idea kicking around for a while and figured I’d put it out into the universe.
A lot of the basis for the “humans are space orcs” stuff is the idea that we’re pretty durable compared to many species, yeah? When it comes to physical trauma, we can bounce back from most things that don’t kill us outright, especially given the benefit of hypothetical space-age technology, and adrenaline is one heck of a drug when it comes to functioning under stress.
But that doesn’t make us unkillable, and even though we can survive debilitating injuries and not die from shock, it doesn’t mean it’s fun. Dying of shock sucks, but at least it’s probably quick.
So - Imagine a ship, adrift in space, slowly being drawn into a star or something. In order to save the ship, someone has to repair the hyper-quantum-relay-majig on the hull or in the engine or whatever. Bit of a problem though- there’s a ton of deadly, deadly radiation (Wrath of Khan style) or poisonous fumes or, I dunno, electrical current, between the crew and the repair. Like, enough to kill most species instantly, so the crew is just like, ‘welp, guess we’ll die then’. But then.
BUT THEN
They ask the human. Because everyone’s heard the stories - you’re basically unkillable, right? Could you survive long enough in there to fix it? And their human goes real quiet for a second, but still says ‘Yeah, I could fix it’. And the rest of the crew is like, ‘Whaaaaaa, it won’t kill you?’ and the human repeats “I can fix it” (which isn’t an answer, but no one catches that, not yet at least), so they send ‘em in. And the human fixes it, they come back, the ship flies to safety, and the crew is thrilled to survive. If the human is a little quiet, well, they’re entitled after pulling off a miracle. Everyone else is just excited to get to the nearest station’s bar to tell their very own human story, cuz, ‘those crazy humans, amiright?’.
The good mood keeps up until the human is late for their next shift. At first it’s just faint unease, but- but they earned a bit of a lie-in, right? No reason to begrudge them some extra rest, even if it is a little weird for them to oversleep. They’ll be fine. Humans are always fine.
(Right?)
(…Wrong.)
- What is… help. Help!-
- ake up! You have t-
- been days. You need sleep, you-
- nother transfusion. We could-
- out of sedatives!-
A week later, the crew finally reaches the station. They stumble into the bar, haggard and haunted. And over the next months and years a new rumor about humans starts to make its way through space. A rumor unlike any before.
‘Be careful with your humans’ it whispers. ‘Their strength is not always a blessing. Be sure they don’t do something they can’t come back from, because when a human dies… they die slowly.’
The thing is, humans can be tricky. And if they’re sufficiently pack-bonded with a ship’s crew? And that crew is in danger? They’ll willingly offer themselves up to make sure the crew survives.
They won’t tell their crewmates that whatever danger it is will just kill them slowly, that they can endure the exposure but not the long-term effects.
But the idea that humans can be fragile? Can die later from exposure to radiation or toxins or electricity or even smoke inhalation?
It seems preposterous!
There are too many stories about humans surviving all sorts of conditions that would kill their other crewmates. A human dying slowly, later, lingering and in agony? It’s a creepy story but of course it’s not true.
But then… another crew shares their own story. Their human volunteered to go into the danger zone to fix what needed to be fixed. Or maybe she had to retrieve a critical component or resource. And she lingered. Wasted away. Later the human doctors told their medical team there was nothing they could do but make sure she was comfortable, ease her pain before the end.
And yet another crew, whose human plunged through smoke and ash to make sure his crew could escape. He choked and coughed and couldn’t get enough air. Their medical commander performed an autopsy and found his lungs and throat and sinuses all coated in black soot and blackened mucus and red blood.
So the stories spread. Just because they don’t die of shock, just because they don’t die right away doesn’t mean it won’t kill them. They linger in agony or unconscious or waste away slowly.
But what’s most horrifying of all?
When other humans hear the stories from the traumatized crewmembers?
They aren’t surprised or horrified.
They say “Of course”
They say “I would have done the same”
They say “it was the Right Thing to do”
And they’ll smile (what the crew’s human would have called a sad smile) and toast to the dead. For making “The ultimate sacrifice for the folks they loved” and every human listening will say the name and drink a shot of liquor.
Human: *does a heroic thing*
Starfleet Captain: Good boy! *ruffles the human’s hair*
humans are space orcs. space orcs are good dogs.
I mean a girl could get emotional, though. because dogs, after all, are not made in our image: they’re made in the image of our most perfect friends. dogs are our best friends! and every dog story, every movie and book and anecdote, boils down to “I can’t believe we got so fucking lucky. we’re not worthy oh god they’re too good for us! they’re so good! we have to take care of them, we have to at least try to love them back as much as they love us.”
so when we imagined ourselves in the stars, we imagined ourselves as we are, yes – but mostly, as we would like to be. as we aspire to be. as really good friends.
....you folks know how old your phone is/how long you've had it?
i looked up the purchase confirmation email (june 2021), i didn't know offhand
I had to look back in my photo gallery to when this batch of photos originated (October 2021.)
I envy all who have the option to go beyond "expected lifespan" for electronics.
I, somehow, kill electronics. It is incredibly rare for me to make it the full 2 years of a phone contract without issue. Only once (in the past 20ish years) has that been because of physical damage/dropping the dumb thing.
Other electronics that don't last long when I am in regular contact with them include: laptops, tablets, game controllers, digital watches, Bluetooth headphones, and my car's keyfob...
Also, I can't carry keycards (like you get for hotel rooms) in a pocket for more than a few minutes, otherwise they'll stop working... hotel receptionists give you weird looks when you have to get your card rekeyed once or twice a day...
The amount of notes that this post gets by the end of April is the amount of words I'll write for one of my books.
I hate the “open floor plan” that everyone is obsessed with in houses now. I want nooks and crannies and bizarre floor plans. I don’t need to be able to see what someone is doing on the other side of the house. I want places to hide and lurk and dwell in the shadows. I am the beast who awaits in the labyrinth
Yes, but also, I want a big, lush conservatory so I can lay in an open space, surrounded by growing things, listening to the rain patter against the glass walls and roof...
Reblogging would be a great help, but don’t feel pressured to
lord the peasants are so loud today
pheasants. PHeasants. The birds
Don't you mean classist Typo, as in discriminating against poor people, and not classicist, the type of academic who studies antiquity in southern Europe?
Achievement unlocked!
Fire post!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE POST IS ON FIRE
your parents just sold you as their firstborn to a fey. problem is you’re already an adult.
You stare at the ethereal beauty in front of you, and they stare back. Neither of you had been expecting this.
“Now that you’ve met, we’re off,” trilled your mother, waving her oversized sunhat and leaning on your father’s arm.
He looked bored. But, he always looked bored. Forced to marry the 14-year-old he’d knocked up at the age of 17, he had shoved all his emotions into a jar he hid in the back of the closet underneath empty suitcases. Only when he got really drunk did any of it spill out.
The fae pointed at your mother’s obviously pregnant belly. “Was that not the child you promised me?”
She shrugged. “I never said this child. I said my firstborn.”
The fae frowned. 35 and 38 was a little old to be having a child for the first time, but people were waiting longer and longer to have kids these days. And there hadn’t been any children’s pictures or art or belongings in the house. Even if the child was now grown, surely there should have been some sign?
@beloveddawn-blog wanting to know more is such a compliment ^.^
So, let's answer some questions!
Hope the mad ramblings are understandable lol
I have a bit of a nasty cold at the moment, so I'm not sure if this will be as coherent as I think it is...
And because @ghostkittypog, @lottelorelei, and @wheat-singularity expressed interest in a continuation, I'm tagging y'all for this. Hope that's okay :)
War profiteering but for polycule drama
Emotional support side piece strategically hooking up with people who don't speak anymore building up a psychological profile of everyone's attachment styles in preparation for establishing their own polycule on the ruins of the former like a steppe nomad warlord claiming the mandate of heaven
insane about this. obviously my ass is going to f/f harem romance this so apologies to OP for being a clown in reblogs BUT.
-a king/emperor has a big harem and falls spontaneously in love with a warrior knight woman he meets out on the road and he brings her home and she immediately starts working to steal all his fucking wives
-like. he's a fussy little spoiled manchild with a lot of weird ideas about masculinity. he meets her and originally thinks shes a man and she's taciturn and stoic and powerful and extremely competent. hes like WOW ur the EPITOME of masculinity and gets a lil mancrush. and then she turns out to be a woman and the only way he knows how to square that circle of "admiration and gender envy" with "but girl???" is to marry her.
-she's not given a choice about getting married. the emperor gets what he wants ofc. this is an extremely critical mistake on his part
-she shows up at the harem and looks at the vicious infighting and the squabbling over scraps and the discontent and the insecurity and is like. oh SOMEONE needs to take a firm hand here. and proceeds to harem politics her way to the top largely by just. not in any way taking the role of a Wife. She doesn't care even one bit about the emperor's opinion of her, and regards him mostly with a combination of exasperated contempt and a sort of reluctant, pitying affection. he is like a pathetic badly behaved puppy. this drives him FUCKING INSANE. he wants her to be impressed by him so bad and she's never like. Rude To Him. but she says "that's nice" with like. Tolerance. she's being Kind.
-being kind isnt going to stop her from stealing his wives though. shes the husband now. she's taking over the harem by like. listening to their problems. locating the central insecurities and needs and power imbalances. and then Addressing Those Directly. mercilessly abusing her power as the emperor's current favorite in order to get gifts to give his OTHER WIVES
-like,,, one of the wives keeps asking for something that she desperately wants. maybe a book or a plant for her garden. and the emperor is kind of ignoring her because she's not one of his favorites. so the New Wife goes to the emperor and says "you want to please me? bring me this." and when he DOES. she's like. "Thank you" and then. IMMEDIATELY. WHILE HE'S STILL THERE. turns around and presents it to the other wife. and like. APOLOGIZES ON THE EMPEROR'S BEHALF FOR THE DELAY IN HER GETTING IT. absolute power move behaviors. could not more clearly be signalling "I see you're failing in your duties, let me take care of that for you"
-she rewards the emperor for good behavior/giving her what she wants with Restrained Approval. very much like. she's not giving off wife vibes she's still giving off strong "older, stronger masculine role model" vibes. claps him on the shoulder and says "good man." the emperor is so fucking confused and so horny about it. the wives are SHOOK.
-emepror starts doing the harem politics competitive eager to please thing without realizing he's doing it. she handles him the exact same way she handles all her other new wives
I would read so many books, comics, short stories, etc, about this <3
But, like, can you imagine the systemic societal changes this would bring about?
At first, it's little things, like women being allowed to have their own money/property that is legally distinct from their husband's/ family's.
Then, some women being allowed into male-dominated industries. Sure, it's still very much a struggle to gain recognition, but women are no longer banned from being soldiers, doctors, barristers, blacksmiths, etc.
Fashion trends begin to shift away from "a woman must look attractive for a man" toward "a woman should feel comfortable in what she wears." I am picturing our best girl being 110% supportive of the timid fashionista wife and proudly wearing the empire-waist meets grecian tunic style dress she made to be more comfortable on 'off' days in the harem
As the emperor starts actively engaging with his harem, he starts noticing the weird little discrepancies in laws and proposals that, at best, inconvenience women. And he starts fixing them, because it'll be such a headache to deal with later and don't the advisors know how much it'll set him back in earning affection points? (Not that he would say that, or even consciously realize it)
And sure, it's still a patriarchal society (no matter how dedicated a person is to changing it, it'll take more than one generation), but it's so much better, and there's finally hope for a better tomorrow
FWIW, "mauve" was one of the coal-tar dyes developed in the mid-19th century that made eye-wateringly bright clothing fashionable for a few decades.
It was an eye-popping magenta purple
HOWEVER, like most aniline dyes, it faded badly, to a washed-out blue-grey ...
...which was the color ignorant youngsters in the 1920s associated with “mauve”.
(This dress is labeled "mauve" as it is the color the above becomes after fading).
They colored their vision of the past with washed-out pastels that were NOTHING like the eye-popping electric shades the mid-Victorians loved. This 1926 fashion history book by Paul di Giafferi paints a hugely distorted, I would say dishonest picture of the past.
Ever since then this faded bluish lavender and not the original electric eye-watering hot pink-purple is the color associated with the word “mauve”.
Oh! Just like the Victorians did to the Gothic, where actual Gothic cathedrals which had been built to be bright and full of light were portrayed as dark and gloomy places, because that's what happens after a cathedral is filled with candles for several hundred years.
I'm re-reading the Discworld series for reasons, and honestly the most relatable part of reading these as an adult is how many of the protagonists start out being tired, used to their little routine and vaguely disgruntled by the interruption of the Plot. Sam Vimes wants to lie drunk in a gutter and absolutely doesn't want to be arresting dragons. Rincewind is yanked into every situation he's ever encountered, though he'd much rather be lying in a gutter too. (Minus the alcohol. Plus regretting everything he's ever done said witnessed or even heard about fourth-hand in his whole life.) Granny Weatherwax is deeply suspicious of foreign parts and that includes the next town over; Nanny has leaned into the armor of "nothing ever happens to jolly grannies who terrorize their daughters-in-law and make Saucy Jokes"
Only the young people don't seem to have picked up on this---and that's fortunate, because someone has to run around making things happen, if only so Vimes and Granny and Rincewind have a reason to get up (complaining bitterly the whole time) and put it all to rights. Without Carrot, Margrat, Eric, etc. these characters don't have that reason; they're likely to stay in the metaphorical gutter and keep wondering where it all went wrong or why anything has to change.
............well, that's not quite true. You get the sense that Vetinari knows how much certain people hate the Plot. And as the person sitting behind the metaphorical lighting board of Ankh-Morpork, he takes no small pleasure in forcing the Plot-haters specifically to stand up, and say some lines.
