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@isweartocoffee / isweartocoffee.tumblr.com

here i am, 26 and gayer than ever, he/they
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lady-feral

Omg

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higglety

Why is the lighting on this so dramatic? Is this an eldritch pie? Is it poisoned? Is it magic? If I eat it will I see visions of the future? Will I astrally project into a blueberry?

It’s evil pie

And I’m the overly-practical loser who sees this and goes “YES! PIE!”

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skyliting

That’s goblin fruit pie. Fae not tricking me into pining for pie til I die.

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motherhenna

Ok so I was looking for historical slang terms for penis (gotta be era-accurate when writing vintage dick jokes) and I came across….something

some linguist compiled a literal timeline of genitalia slang–a cock compendium, if you will–that dates back all the way to the fucking 13th CENTURY. This motherfucker tracked the evolution of erection etymology through 800+ years, because if he doesn’t do it, who else will? Thank you for your service, Johnathon Green.

Some of my favorites include:

  • Shaft of Delight (1700s)
  • Womb Sweeper (1980s)
  • Master John Goodfellow (1890s)
  • Nimble-Wimble (1650s)
  • Corporal Love (1930s)
  • Staff of Life (1880s)
  • Spindle (1530s)
  • As good as ever twanged (1670s)
  • Gaying Instrument (1810s)
  • Beef Torpedo (1980s)

and last but not least, the first recorded use of the word Schlong, which was in 1865 CE. Tag yourself, I’m Nimble Wimble 

And are the lovely ladies feeling left out? not to worry! Johnathon’s got you covered, gals, because he also made one for vaginas. Highlights:

  • Mrs. Fubb’s Parlor (1820s)
  • Poontang (1950s)
  • Spunk Box (1720s)
  • Ringerangroo (1930s)
  • Ineffable (1890s)
  • Itching Jenny (1890s)
  • Carnal Mantrap (1890s - a busy decade apparently)
  • Bookbinder’s Wife (1760s)
  • Rough Malkin (1530s)
  • Socket (1460s)

and a personal favorite, crinkum-crankum, circa approximately 1670.

this alone has justified the internet

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ghostbusters?

taking over! i’m

virgin!

Posts like this make me realize that I never read anyone’s fucking url

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elanorpam

i made the mistake of reading yours

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  • Taika Waititi actively made sure not only Māori but other indigenous identities, specifically aboriginal Australians, were represented in his film since they were filming on their ancestral lands. 
  • he invited the Yugambeh mob to welcome them and even had a Māori Kaumātua (elder) to perform a Karakia, “a kind of open-up ceremony from [his] side of things as well.”
  • he hired an Aboriginal water company to supply that water on set
  • he wanted to make space for indigenous filmmakers and thus had 8 indigenous interns on set to learn and gain film experience

yes, Taika is a lot of fun and super goofy. But that doesn’t mean Ragnarok doesn’t stand for something bigger. Taika is not only the first Polynesian man to direct a superhero movie, but he is also the first indigenous person to do so too. While he is barrel of laughs and a half, please don’t forget what Taika brought to the MCU. (x) (x) (x)

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