shadow the hedgehog is cool. gunblades are cool. vampires are cool. scythes are cool. white hair is cool. we need to stop lying about what is not cool

in my room on a saturday evening talking to myself like this

Y’all already know but APRIL FOOLS!!!

The haters will never win. Bella’s ass is literally ginormous. She’s double caked up. Got some junk in the trunk, baby. Pixar mom type build. It’s so massive, it causes gravitational lensing. If it was any bigger, it would have its own zip code. Her gift isn’t a shield, it’s having a juicy ass and thick thighs!!

Long live Bella and her dumptruck ass🚚🍑

Fine! I admit it! Her ass is flat!

I hope you’re all happy!

characters putting themselves together is my SHIT

do i love watching a carefully-pressed-suits-and-neat-hair character slowly deteriorate into unbuttoned, wild-hair, dirt-streaked screaming? yes

but you know what i love even more?

the slow reconstruction of a character who has been a mess, generally given no fucks about their appearance, and they have a battle to fight (political, romantic, whatever) that they can only do through looks

so they button their shirt. or tuck it in. or straighten a tie or roll down their sleeves or push their hair out of their eyes and just do it so slowly and deliberately that you know

it’s like armor

i love it

the dude string trail

(aka jasper cowboy headcanons UwU)

i had a conversation with the one and only @su-angelvicioso that inspired me so strongly i wrote this even though i was Not Writing Twilight at the time, and you know what fuck it, i think it's funny. cori, as always, thank you for being my favorite person to talk about twilight with.

La bruja y el mariachi

Insta: @debbiebalboa

Originally drew this for Mexican Independence Day + Bi Visibility Day last year but I never posted it so happy pride month instead !

a bisexual butch with her bi femme <3

For the record, characters don’t have autonomy. Very true! Some people were pointing this out on reddit today (on a post very similar to the one i made earlier actually!), and in doing so, showed me that they completely missed the point.

Deconstructing the negative treatment of characters of color (as well as characters from other marginalized groups) is not about the characters’ feelings, and it never has been. Fandoms that relentlessly shit on characters of color are white-washed and harmful to fans of color. So yes, you’re not hurting the wolfpack or María or any character by saying you dislike them or think they’re toxic characters. HOWEVER, you could be buying into very real stereotypes and projecting them unfairly onto characters. Which, again, is bad for fans of color, who deserve to exist in a space where characters who look like them aren’t torn to shreds over nothing.

So the end goal is NOT “be nice to so-and-so character!” because the character deserves it. The characters aren’t real, and they don’t have feelings. That was never the point. The point is ALWAYS to reevaluate WHY you feel negatively towards a character, because if you don’t have a good reason, it might just be racism or fatphobia or homophobia or some other prejudice making that happen in your brain. And you should fix that! And in doing so, make the communities you engage with more welcoming towards people of color, LGBTQ+ people, fat people, women, etc.

The goal is to make fandom less bigoted. And to do that, we NEED to think about WHY we hold specific opinions about media—and this very much includes how you view and portray the characters in said media.

So don’t be thoughtful about how you speak about María to protect her feelings—do it to ensure you aren’t making women of color feel alienated by the fandom. And to make sure YOU aren’t buying into racist, sexist rhetoric.

Louder for the people in the back!!! 🗣️💯

Reblog and write in the tags characters whose haters are so obsessed with them that they’re practically fans.

Respect María or perish!!!

But it still physically pains me to like emotionally abusive people now matter how much I love their reasoning or intentions I'm sorry

Even the creepy but still nice ones like Edward for trying to control Bella and being an absolute dick to bby Rosy

And Jacob for the same thing, and wanting to marry a child (that means Quil too) and sexually assaulting Bella

Or Carlisle for stealing Jacob's blood and comparing him to an ape

Or Jasper for being Confederate

Or Sam for being inherently abusive

I love them but fucking SMEYER HAD TO GO BE A BITCH AND FUCK THEM UP AAHAGAGHSHSSJDU 😭

It's not ok

I know it's been 4 years so I'm late as hell but how do you enjoy any aspect of Twilight if every single character physically pains you. like. they all have moments where they do toxic or harmful shit.

I legitimately think the only character who never does anything "wrong" is Seth. Also Angela. Yay, a story of two people!

The thing is--there's context for many of the actions named above. Rosalie has a lot of trauma, and she doesn't handle it that well--this doesn't absolve her, but it does explain why she's "mean." Similarly, Leah had her heart broken by Sam, is dealing with her father's death, etc. so she's lashing out. Again, not an excuse, but it is 100% understandable. Also, re: imprinting--that's Smeyer's fucked up bullshit. To assume Quil and Jacob are nasty gross awful people with evil intent when the in-canon explanation is that it's NOT "marrying a child" is, to me, fucked up. As a meta-analysis, YES, we can shit on the concept of imprinting, call it out for basically being grooming, and so on. We SHOULD do that. But in-universe? It doesn't make them "bad" or irredeemable people, and y'all need to get it together with this bullshit. They're teenage boys who had their lives changed forever bc those damn Cullens wouldn't move away from Forks. Be for real. (And I say this as someone who was groomed!! so do NOT come for me!!)

(I'll add that there are some actions listed I'm not gonna defend--context doesn't make it any better. Carlisle stealing blood, Jasper being a confederate, Renee, etc.)

Characters do fucked up shit sometimes. Because they are supposed to portray people, and people are not perfect. People react in hurtful ways, and it doesn't mean they are "bad people" or "inherently abusive." People are raised with shitty views and have to learn how to be better people. People are put in situations in which they can't control themselves (example: Sam hurting Emily on accident due to phasing). Conflict is INHERENT to human interaction, and as such, inherent to stories about people!

So to read about María, who Jasper harbors no ill will towards might I add, and assume she was sooooo toxic and abusive towards him, and that he has so much trauma from her...............that doesn't sit right with me. We know almost nothing about her. We know she lost everything (twice! And the second time it was her mate!!), and fought to take back a piece of it. We know it was a hard life that Jasper was glad to leave. However, we also know that he does not carry anger for her, he does not hate her or resent her, etc. He wishes her WELL.

So get the fuck out of here with the bullshit. And this isn't even @ the person who responded to me all those years ago, this is @ all the people i see NOW spewing the same garbage. Your head canons about how abusive she was are tired. If you paint her as a seductress, manipulative, evil woman--congrats. You're repeating the same RACIST rhetoric that people have been using against brown women for centuries. Wow, aren't you cute and original and interesting. 🙄

Ma’am you went OFF with this read! 💯

I said it once and I’ll say it again:

People will “I just can’t get behind toxic, manipulative, abusive characters/ships :/“ you to DEATH when it comes to María/Jasría, or any other brown character who has any slight imperfection. (In what way is sam ‘inherently’ abusive? Jfc..)

… but then they turn around stanning and praising other characters/ships that are also toxic and manipulative.

It’s not the manipulation you have a problem with me thinks….

It will FOREVER be funny asf to me that Jasper, the character they woobify and baby so much, literally has No Issue with María. The woman they desperately want him to hate so bad.💀

I think people like to (intentionally or not) confuse Jaspers feelings for the environment/circumstances both he and María were in and his feelings for María herself. They are two separate things as we see from his own words and actions towards both. He laments about his time in the war and how depressive it was while also speaking of María in a more delicate way and not only that but, as you graciously mentioned, he wishes her WELL!!! He even had a thought of contacting her so clearly he’s okay with her existence LOL! If he wasn’t okay with it he would’ve tried to take her out MUCH sooner. He makes Zero (0) attempts to harm her whatsoever even when provoked or given a motive because he simply DOESN’T WANT TO! He is in fact HAPPY to not have to do so.

So clearly they’re not any worse than the others as people try so hard twisting shit to make them out to be. Christ even Smeyer herself didn’t portray her as bad as some of these people do. Imagine treating the brown characters worse than the author did. It’s giving New Record.

Thank you E for allowing me to throw this in:

I was actually just about to go on lil rant about anti-María people because I’m so sick of them trying to insinuate that she’s stupid or something for “staying in one place” running her army for so long when she’s CLEARLY not stupid if she’s still alive and fucking kicking in the present lmao. She’s still out here existing having been in a dangerous fucking environment for so long. (and if I’m not mistaken weren’t we told that the wars died down and she mostly just defends what she has from interlopers?) Not only that, but do people not know how that stuff works???

If she’s still alive then OBVIOUSLY she’s not staying in one single place the Entire Time. She would never make herself an easy target. These people have clearly never lived in a single bad area a day in their fucking lives lmao. Pretty much the first thing you learn to do is how to move in a general way so you’re not an easy target lmao. They really think she’s just sitting in one spot as if she didn’t acquire more territory. To allow her to move about much easier… I hate to relate it to the Cartels but that’s exactly what Meyer was basically alluding to when portraying her character and what she’s associated with: “The big bad south-of-the-border vampires that engage in Blood Wars (aka Drug Wars)” do people think these highly dangerous/organized/Wanted™ people simply stay put in one spot and never move about to help keep a low profile??? Have these people never been to a single fucking neighborhood where you always have to watch out for some crazy shit around the damn corner and keep your fucking eyes peeled? Do people not understand the ways that certain people (especially wanted people who are in dangerous situations, gang wars, etc …) have to move in certain areas, cities, etc…???

These people have no idea what any of her backstory really means, the implications behind it nor the crucial small details that go into living a life she did… and SURVIVING the way she did… and it shows.

Especially not if they literally think she sat in one spot and never moved around when she’s literally a wanted person…

The way some people seem committed to spreading misinformation about her will forever be weird to me. I said it before and i’ll say it again: Pretty much all the anti-María bullshit people tend to say about her gets debunked in canon when you simply give it a second glance and an ounce of more thought lmao. In fact a lot of times it’s the exact opposite. (She is literally described as a smart woman in canon.) yet the same people are always trying to twist it, I wonder why…

In honor of pride month I really felt like putting together some cute gay hc’s for fun and even though I don’t talk about Alice much on this blog, this so happens to be one of my favorite lesbian ships! Y’all can have a lotta gay, as a gift. To whoever sees this mess, I hope y’all like it! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💖

•Some time after they met, María found that she couldn’t get Alice outta her mind.

•Whenever she came around, she was always so obvious in her crush on her.

•Alice thought it was adorable how she tried to remain strong but would always crack when it came to Alice, and she began to tease her until María finally admitted to it.

•Their first date was hilarious because María was actually nervous for once and didn’t know what to do.

•Alice is like “Just be yourself!!” and María’s like “Right... what battle strategy is that again??”

•Alice: ??!?!???!?

•María sings to Alice like all the time, and most of the songs contain lyrics that speak of how much she loves her.

•Her voice is so delicate and musical and Alice especially loves it when she sings in her native tongue.

•Alice loves cuddling María? Like that’s just her favorite thing to do.

•It’s always when María least expects it too. Alice knows that María is like a seasoned veteran lmfao but she tends to forget sometimes because “She’s so cute!!”

•So she just hugs her from behind and for a split second María is like “am I being attacc??” Until she realizes and it never fails to make Alice laugh.

•María won’t ever admit it but she’s the one that plans all the “couples matching” things.

•She’ll pick out the same nail polish and do the exact same design. She’ll pick out the same outfits, colors, jewelry, shoes anything so she can match with her gf.

•She gets such a warm fuzzy feeling about it. It makes her feel close to someone, which she hasn’t felt in a long time.

•Now Alice is already Gay & Horny™ for María, but when María does Anything culturally significant, she becomes 10x gayer and 10x more horny.

•She speaks in her actual/endangered native language? She cooks an authentic dish? She tells her stories of where she comes from? She dances to her music? Celebrates any holiday? Alice is all over it.

•Speaking of cooking, we just Know that María loves having Alice be her little taste tester in the kitchen.

•She’s in the kitchen bustling around and Alice is sitting on her stool waiting to lick the spoons and be served.

•Her favorite things to cook for Alice are pastries and Mexican rice. (Mostly because those are the main things Alice begs for lmfao)

•Because they are both some tiny things, they usually have to use each other for help with damn near everything.

•There’s been many incidents of someone walking in on Alice or María standing on the others back to reach something higher up. They do the same thing while laying down when needing to reach something that’s under a piece of furniture.

•They use their sizes to an advantage as well, hiding in small spaces and jumping out on people, running and sneaking around people knowing they’re hard to catch.

•They love using each other in the most efficient ways when fighting together too.

•Alice will never shut up about María. Like ever.

•Even in public she’s like “My girlfriend is hot and I love her!!”, “María loves this brand!”, “María wouldn’t treat me like this!!”, “Do you know who I am?! Do you know my gf!? She’s an infamous warlord and she will destroy your entire life!! Do you know who you’re fucking with?!?”

•Everyone, even strangers, are like “We get it!!” But she doesn’t care and doesn’t stop lol.

•María is definitely petty and makes fun of Alice for being shorter and finally feeling great for having someone be shorter than her

•But Alice always gets mad and shuts her ass down like “girl.. it is just 3 inches, we wear the same clothes and fit in the same places. humble yourself. I wouldn’t be surprised if you were lying about how tall you are all along.”

•Which makes María mad lmfao.

•They are literally so overprotective of each other it’s actually hilarious. If Anyone says any shit about María, Alice is On Their Ass like flies on shit lmao.

•“YOU DON’T KNOW HER LIKE I DO!!!🤬”

•She has legit gotten into fights with people over María and doesn’t regret it one bit.

•Which is hilarious because the minute the person touched Alice, María was already choking them, giving Alice free reign to beat their ass.

•They always walk away unscathed and laughing (like they didn’t just beat the shit outta someone) every time.

•Pet names are just natural for them lol. You won’t go one day without hearing María call Alice her “lil muffin” or Alice calling María her “brownie bun” they usually always allude to sweets because they like sweets and they’re so sweet on each other.

•Forehead Kisses, Nose Kisses, Cheek Kisses, All the kisses. They give the cutest little kisses ever at random times throughout the day.

•Whenever María has a traumatic flashback/break down over any number of reasons (she’s seen some shit), Alice is always there to hold her and bring her back into reality, reassuring her that she’s not alone anymore and that she doesn’t have to deal with her problems all alone either. Alice helps her relax when she can’t do it herself.

•After losing everyone she’s ever loved, María tends to feel as if Alice should not be with her, fearing that something may happen to her.

•She feels that she doesn’t deserve any kind of love, especially not now.

•She feels that she should be left to die somewhere but Alice always snaps her out of it before she can do anything rash like she used to.

•With the stories she’s heard from María, Alice always wonders how María is even alive and kicking to this day.

•“A lesser person would have been dead by now, you’re strong. So keep going. You can’t change the past, it’s okay to be you.” She tells her.

•Alice Hates it when people flirt with María.

•She isn’t jealous because she thinks there’s a chance María would ever leave her, she’s just pissed that someone would actually have The Audacity to even try it with her.

•Especially when she’s standing right there.

•“How DARE they even think they stand a chance with you when the love of your life is already right here!!”

•She’s so petty she’ll literally start making out with her until the offender gets awkward and leaves.

•María is a bit clingy due to her past, though she pretends she’s not; but Alice actually loves it.

•Whenever they go anywhere María’s hand is glued to Alice’s. She has a hard time letting go if need be

•Whenever she gets the chance she’s right back at Alices side entangling their fingers.

•When they’re sitting down María can’t help but lean closer to Alice and even rest her head on her shoulder.

•Whenever María becomes too close to anyone she becomes really affectionate towards them and she always makes Alice explode in butterflies.

•People are genuinely surprised at how María becomes like the softest baby when she’s with Alice.

•Because she’s usually either a big ball of energy or just straight up cold to other people but with Alice she becomes a literal cuddle bug

•Alice is like “She’s always been like this, just not with you guys :))” Because she feels special that María is usually only that way with her.

•Whenever María sees Alice doing anything she’s always turns into that super supportive gf. She’s like “THATS MY GF!! YOU’RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE!!” “I LOVE YOU!!”

•They’re both Dramatic as hell so whenever anything happens they make it Extra and call the other so that they can be dramatic together. Their phone conversations always start with “YOU WONT BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED!!” and the other is like “BITCH SPILL IT!!”

•They are So Cute together? Everyone just sees them as adorable, crazy, babies and they literally win Cutest Couple every year. It’s not actually a contest but they still winning lmao.

If I might add: Cynthia says she has Two (2) older sisters named Mary. María loves Alice's little sister as if she were her own sister

@light-miracles From what I remember, I believe it was a human au? I know I made this like forever ago but from what I remember around this time i was getting some ship au requests for them and then I decided to just write up a long post with some of my own personal headcanons for them that I’d never shared before Lol! 😂 I’m happy to know you like this old gem tho! 💎

our best girl! causing havoc in the south!

@su-angelvicioso @fuckmeyer

She is so pretty 😍❤️✨

actually if we’re mutuals we are valentines. no takebacksies.