2000 Mice in a Trenchcoat

as an autistic jew, passover is objectively the best holiday because it’s a dinner party with a script that everyone has to follow

as another autistic jew, passover is objectively the worst holiday because i can’t eat any of my normal foods and that’s horrible

As a 3rd autistic jew, I agree with both, but *Also* passover is the best holiday because as long as I can reapply a special interest to the pesach story I can talk about it whenever

But its the Worst holiday because there is mandatory cleaning with a deadline before

As a 4th autistic jew I think there are merits to many of these points but wanted to bring up that the food is basically the same every year, which is really nice and predictable

But passover also sucks because you’re expected to read with people watching you

4 Jews, 6 opinions. You did it, y’all! You brought that old Jewish joke to life! <3

So that’s how my morning is going.

Blessings

high school is soo funny in hindsight. the entire time you're there thinking it's the most important period of your life and then the second you're out you're like well that was fucking stupid

i think itd be nice to be a goat or satyr. id love to eat an aluminum can someday

actually tumblr i think this one's just for me. thanks

I drew the gang,

my horrible hybrid of all of them

How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.

I'm sorry but this is so funny

as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

sorry. only semi-related but i simply wasn't ready for "the sun is a distant gorilla". thank you NASA

starting tomorrow i will be a real person in this world

oh! i forgot to do this. okay starting tomorrow i will be a real person in this world and i actually seriously genuinely properly truly mean it this time

me every day without fail: I'll do [chore] when I get home

me when I get home:

me every single week: I'll do it on the weekend!

me the entire weekend:

ⓘ You can Bite your Friends.

ⓘ reblog to fuckign BITE your mutuals

On your MOST FOLLOWED blog on Tumblr,

they diagnosed me with i love you and it’s incurable

Kabru trying his usual approach to undermining people against Laios is so funny. It’s like he’s a grandmaster at chess, poker, and everything else that requires mind-games coming up to a guy, fully expecting to beat him at any game under any circumstances, only to realize he didn’t prepare for the one thing he’d actually be faced with, which is a hotdog eating contest against a guy whose friends call him “the vacuum cleaner”.

A lot of people in the reblogs are referencing that meme to say that Laios is eating all the chess pieces while Kabru’s not looking, which isn’t really true in my opinion. For him to eat the pieces would imply that he’s also playing chess, or is interested in competing against Kabru at anything, or that he’s interested in the chess pieces to begin with. He doesn’t even know a game’s going on! The scenario is more like Kabru sits him down after going though 8000 simulations in his head, puts a chess board in between them, and before he can start setting up the pieces, Laios mistakes that chess board for a dinner plate and slams one of these down onto it.

hey boss i can't come in today it's a sunny day and there's a lovely breeze coming in through my window, yeah it's rustling the branches of the tree outside that's finally bloomed so it's pretty serious