Avatar

"Oh, I love Led Zeppelin!"

@gracefultrenchcoat494-blog

SPN, Marvel, TVD, TO. destiel. parkner. and other shit
Avatar

Guys I'm gonna fucking do this.

I'm going to put fursuit in my psychology essay on innatrentional blindness.

Basically you can be so focused on one thing you wont notice a pretty noticable thing happen, and even though it was in your vision, it wont even register in your memory.

Like the experiment where participants were so focused on a basketball, they didnt notice someone in a gorilla suit walk by.

I'm going to call it a gorilla fursuit.

I'm fucking invincible. The teacher cant do shit.

I fucking did it.

Absolute madlad

You dont understand this.

There are several possible results

  • She looks up what a fursuit is. And she learns about furries.
  • She asks me what a fursuit is. And I'm going to explain the concept of furries to a middle aged woman.
  • She knows what a furry is, and feels very uncomfortable each time fursuit comes up.
  • She knows what a furry is, and sends me to online detention for being "inappropriate" and i talk to a higher up staff member who doesnt know what furries are, and she gets in trouble for falsely reporting me to detention, and BEING THE ONE WHO STARTED TALKING ABOUT FURRY SEX.
  • She doesnt know what fursuits are, and asks me. And you know what I'm gonna do? I'm going to give a loose description, where it seems more applicable to people in her personal life. Here are some examples

"Hey son, I noticed you seem to like characters like bugs bunny, are you a furry?"

"So I told janette, right? About my job as a veterinarian? And guess what she asked? "What?" SHE ASKED ME IF I WAS A FURRY."

"God. I swear someone has it out for me. My mom works as a teacher at an online school, right? And one of her students told her what a furry was, very loosely, so now my moms convinced shes a furry because she likes animals and Mickey mouse. And I cant correct her, because not only would I get in trouble for knowing about "yiffing" but also because the last thing I'll ever do is explain furry sex to my mom."

Teacher after researching furries: wow, this is...... pretty hot.

Avatar
Avatar
torsamors

This is one of the thai restaurants in my hometown and i can tell you first hand this lady is wonderful

little update bc someone from my hometown wrote an article about her and these are some highlights:

and my personal favorite:

Avatar
lookninjas

Should’ve known it was Marquette.

this is such a fun article and also:

and bc it’s worth reiterating:

I wanna road trip just to go to her restaurant??!

Avatar
Avatar
lovelyirony

“tony needs a suit and steve doesn’t” yeah ur right he doesn’t need a suit he just needed steroids quit pretending lmao 

Avatar
Avatar
sunflorally

there will be people who come into your life and will teach you how to love by not loving you. lessons can come in painful and mysterious ways like this; pay attention and listen to the messages life’s trying to teach you.

Avatar
Avatar
sketiana

peter, who can lift up to 10 tons in canon, carrying an elephant in his arms: this is my new pet

tony, losing all color in his face: okay okay cool cool okay cool oka

peter: *drops his backpack on the floor*

concrete: *cracks*

tony, whispering: what the fuck.

tony: you can lift up to 10 thousand kilograms? thats like-

peter, thinking about his abandoned nintendogs: almost enough to lift the weight of my sins, yes

tony:??????

thor: what is this child doing on the battlefield

peter: *picks up the hulk, yeets him 700mph at a flock of aliens* ANGERY SHREK ATTACK

thor: …….nvm

Avatar

-You’re basically more than Klaus’ girlfriend, but not officially engaged/married yet

-You met him a long time before he even went to New Orleans before it burned down, being his sanctuary to go to when things got hard for him

-You both bordered on having a relationship, and it was finally solidified when he asked you to leave (home city) to go to New Orleans with him and help raise the baby with Hayley

-You agree obviously, and when you get there, you’re hidden in the shadows of the Mikealsons throughout all the drama

-You’re only named the Queen because of Klaus and how much you’re seen with him

-He has a tendency to rip out the hearts of people who bump into you in the road 

-Or people who stare too long

-He also has a tendency to brutally torture people who try to harm you purposely

-And sends their limbs back to their boss as a threat

-It doesn’t bother you how gruesome he is, you’re used to it

-You have supernaturals coming on your doorstep asking to serve “The French Queen.”

-You have no idea where you became so famous

-But you’re not complaining

-Eventually you gather a big enough army to take back the Quarter

-And don’t get me wrong, just because you didn’t do much to be named “Queen”, doesn’t mean you’re not a total badass

-You keep all of the hybrids and witches who joined you in line

-People would rather deal with Klaus than you when they do something wrong

-Once this girl tried to kill you and be named Queen instead

-The next day her body parts were torn and hung up as festive decorations in the courtyard

-With you sipping her blood out of a wine glass

-Klaus was very proud of you

-Marcel tries to take you down

-Because he realizes he takes you down, then Klaus goes down with you

-He sends Davina to try and find your weakness/be a spy

-You found out immediately

-”So Marcel can’t kill us himself, so he has to send a little girl to do it?”

-She tries to give you an aneurysm, but it doesn’t work and you speed forward and grab her neck

-”Tell your pathetic vampire that if he wants to take down a Mikealson, do it himself next time. Because my Klaus will win this war, and the day he does, Marcellus better be in another country.”

-You pause, looking her over

-”You can tell him after we fix your split ends, they’re bothering me.”

-”Have you been locked in an attic for a majority of your life?? Fix your hair for Christ’s sakes.”

-You freak her out, by not killing her, but by taking care of her

-Better then Marcel ever has

-Rebekah is your ultimate best friend

-You’d rather avoid Hayley at all costs 

-Elijah and you have an interesting relationship

-A really strong platonic one

-Kol is a pain in your ass, but you know he just needs love so you just baby him all the time

-”Kol, you’re not going to kill her.”

-”I AM A CREATURE OF THE NIGHT WOMAN–are those blood cookies?”

-You’ve never really met the rest of his siblings

-Do you want to though???

-Many people who know you and the siblings personally don’t know whether to be extremely afraid or gawk in how adorable you guys are to each other

-Like once Stephen walked in to you wrestling Kol for the remote, while Rebekah was doing yoga

-Elijah was wrapped in a bunch of blankets like a burrito on the couch, sleeping

-Klaus was baking cookies

-So does Stephen laugh??? Or back away from a family of killers?

-No one knows

Avatar

His Flower Crown Chapter 2: As I Lay Dying

 Your eyes flutter awake when the sun hits them. The decision to not close the blinds to look at the stars before you fell asleep is one that you regretted deeply. You close your eyes and turn on your other side where there is no direct sunlight. 

“Wake up, love.” You hear an all too familiar voice say softly.

Your eyes snap open and you see Klaus sat on the edge of your bed. 

“Klaus?” You ask while you try to sit up. 

Thought you could get away? Don’t worry, I’ll be back for you soon enough.“ He says with his eyes turning yellow. 

——————-

You wake up, breathing heavily. Just another nightmare. The third one in a row. Ever since Elijah and Niklaus disappeared, you’ve been on edge. Ever since you heard his voice while holding Stephan up, you haven’t been able to be anywhere in peace. You almost stabbed Damon the other day when he woke you up from your nap on the couch. You shake your head to trying to shake away the nerves. You sigh and swing your legs over to get a start to your day. 

After you finished getting dressed and you put on your shoes, you heard a thud followed by a sudden door slam. You rush downstairs to find nothing in the living room, but you hear voices coming from the cellar. You go down to the basement and see Stephan talking to Damon through the door. 

"What happened?” You ask, getting closer. 

“He took off his ring and stood in front of the sun.” Stephan says while turning to face you. 

“Really, Damon?” You ask, with frustration in your voice as you stare down at him on the ground. “We are trying to find you a cure and that’s not going to work if you kill yourself before that." 

"You saw what happened to Rose. What if that happens to me?” He coughs out. He’s been like this for two days and it’s already advanced so much. 

“We are better prepared this time. We didn’t put Rose in the cellar, we didn’t know what was going on or how to treat it. We still don’t but at least we aren’t as clueless." 

Stephan pulls you aside, "I have to go meet Bonnie." 

"Go, I’ll stay here with him.” You tell him. "Are you sure?“ He asks, knowing Damon might say some rude things.

"I’ll be fine. He’s like family. You both are. I’m not leaving just because my family’s in trouble and they might be rude." 

"Okay. Thank you, Name." 

"And Stephan?” You call out to him, and he turns around, “I’m sorry for not telling you.” You say. 

“Once this is all over, we’ll talk about it okay?” He says with a small smile. 

You give him a head nod, and go back to see Damon. You sigh, “I’ll go get us some drinks." 

———————–

When Klaus wakes up he finds himself in the forest. He smiles. He is now all werewolf and all vampire. The moment is cut short by Elijah throwing him his clothes. 

"How long?” He asks as he pulls up his pants. 

“Almost two days.” Elijah answers. 

“Well, I can change at will then. That’s good to know. I remember every kill." 

"Yes, I’ve been cleaning up your mess along the way." 

"I remember that too.” He says while pulling on his shirt. 

“I hope you remember our deal.” Elijah says while leaning against a tree. 

“In due time brother. I have some plans before that.” He pats Elijah on the shoulder as he walks away, “You know something strange about that night? I must have been so close to death that I saw Name. It was almost as if I heard her. But that’s impossible right? Unless there is something you know something that I don’t." 

Elijah walk with him, "Name died in 1896, Niklaus. It must have been a trick of the light. There was someone who looked a lot like her." 

"Yes, that must have been it.” He says with a smile, “Come along, brother. Much to do and so little time to do it." 

Elijah follows him, worried that Niklaus didn’t believe him. The whole reason he had Bonnie lock you in the house was that incase it didn’t work, he wanted to prevent Niklaus seeing you, so that you could live a normal life. Well, as normal as your life could get. He knew you would be mad at him, but he wanted to spare you. That’s all he wants. For you to be happy and safe. 

—————————–

10th century

You and Rebekah were playing around by the waterfall with Niklaus and Elijah watching you from a very far distance. "Watching” being a very loose term. You both had slipped away to be by yourselves because you were both tired of having to be watched. You were twelve! You weren’t babies anymore!

You started to move as you spun when you tripped over a tree root and fell in the water. 

“NAME!!!” Rebekah yells as she sees you fall, “KLAUS! ELIJAH!” She shouts as she tries to keep up with your body that’s being dragged by the current. The strong current is pushing your head under the water. Your screams are coming out broken. 

You feel arms wrap around you and they pull you toward the river bank. You cough up water and wrap your arms around you. Nklaus has yet to let go of you, “What were you thinking?!” He yells, “If Rebekah hadn’t called us, this situation would have been very different!" 

You get out of his hold, "I’m fine, Niklaus.” You stated with a raspy voice. 

“You clearly are not!” He yells back, “Did you stop to think what could have happened? Your father! Did you think of how devastated he would be?" 

"It’s not like I dove into swim! I tripped!” You yelled, trying to defend yourself. 

“But you snuck away from Elijah and I. If you wouldn’t have this wouldn’t have happened!" 

You back away from him. 

"Enough, Niklaus. She’s already frightened from what happened there’s no need to frighten her more.” Elijah says while giving you the blanket that they had brought. 

You give him a small smile, “Thank you, ‘lijah.” And he smiles right back at you. 

Rebekah doesn’t let go of your hand until you get home. That night you hear a tapping on your window. You grab the lit candle that you keep on the floor next to your bed and got to the window. As quietly as you can as to not wake your father. When you open it, you see Niklaus there. 

“Niklaus?” You whisper in confusion. 

He sighs, “I just wanted to apologize for the way I yell at you earlier. I was scared and I put my frustrations into anger toward you. I’m sorry." 

You sigh, "Apology accepted." 

He holds out his hand, "Friends?" 

You grab it and shake, "Friends.” You agree with a smile. 

———————–

Now 

“So that’s where the love story of you and the psychotic killer starts?” Damon asks, breathing heavily. 

“Yes, he wasn’t always a psychotic killer you know?” You answer while pouring him another shot of whiskey, “Before he was turned, he was sweet. He would walk me halfway to my little cabin. I’ve told you about my father, he was very strict about the males he let be around me. Klaus would sneak to the fields of tall grass which I was always afraid of, but it was the one place where no one would look for us. We would climb trees and sit on them. Look at the stars and come up with explanations as to why things were the way they were. After we got married, things started to slowly change. He changed, and I couldn’t accept it, and I couldn’t be apart of his life anymore. He became more cold and distant. So I ran. You found me the night I ran." 

He laughs and that leads him to cough, "If only I knew what I was getting into." 

"What? A life long friendship?” You tease. 

“Nope. Marital problems between a hybrid and his wife.” He gets out in between coughs, “I need a blood bag." 

——————————

"You can’t go to Klaus. He’ll kill you.” Elena tells Stephan after he tells her his reports of what happened at the witches’s house. 

“That’s where the witches pointed me to. I have to try. He doesn’t have long." 

She looks unhappy with him. 

He sighs, "I need you to do me a favor. Don’t tell name where I am or who I’m with. She’s Damon’s best friend and Klaus’s wife." 

"She’s what?” Elena asks in shock. 

“It’s a long story that even I don’t know the answer to. But she ran away from Klaus 100 years ago. If he hasn’t come back for her, it means she’s safe for another couple of days. The point is, she would do anything for Damon. Even hand herself over to get a cure. I’m not going to let her do that. Just let her stay with Damon. Please." 

"Okay. I’ll go visit Damon right now." 

"Thank you." 

"Be safe.” She says as she gives him a hug and kiss. 

“You too." 

—————————

Damon finishes off the blood bag, "Another.” He says throwing the bag to the side. 

“How can you drink that much? I tap out after 2." 

"Because you drink bunny blood. I drink real people stuff." 

"You’re sounding more delirious. Is it because of the scotch or the bite?” You tease. 

“So, tell me more about the hybrid. Gotta make sure he’s up to code." 

"How about instead of talking about my past, we talk about your present? Where were you this morning?" 

"You just don’t want to talk about your husband.” He says in a sing song voice.

“And you don’t want to talk about Elena and how you were at her house this morning." 

"How did you find that out?” He asks, closing his eyes. 

“You just told me. What were you doing there?" 

"Apologizing.” He states while his breathing slows a little bit. 

“Were you trying to get all your affairs in order?” You joke and he doesn’t say anything, “Damon, we are going to find you a cure. When you get through this, and I buy you your 'I almost died, but I’m still here’ drink, I get to say I told you so." 

"Promise?” He asks. 

“Promise.” You affirm. 

“Can you get me another blood bag?” He asks.“You’re worse than Stephan during his ripper days.” When you open the fridge, you feel someone else in the room.

“Where’s Damon?” The sheriff asks with a gun pointing toward you. 

“He’s sick, sheriff. He’s not himself." 

"Sheriff! Over here!” You hear a voice yell. 

The sheriff locks you in, but you hear a scuffle, and a thud. You call Elena, but she doesn’t answer. Then you call Bonnie. 

“Name?" 

"Bonnie, is Elena with you?” You ask while looking around trying to look for something to help you break the door. 

“No, she went to go visit Damon." 

"Okay. Caroline’s mom was looking for Damon, and she found him, but he got away. He’s probably going to look for Elena. He’s not himself. Please keep an eye on him. I’ll try to find Elena.” You hang up. 

You put your phone back in your jacket pocket. You go to the door and pull off the handle. You’ll fix it later. You run out and get in your car to get to the police station. You park about a block away from it and when you run over there you see a chair fly out of a window. You see Elena trying to climb down. You rush over there. 

“Elena! I’ll catch you." 

"What?!” She asks, not letting go of the edge. 

“Just jump!" 

She jumps and you catch her, but you fall to the ground, "I said I’d catch you, not that it would be a soft landing." 

"Let’s go find Damon.” She says while holding onto her side. 

“That’s probably a good idea.”

You both split up, “I’ll check the grill and you check in the square?” You ask. 

“Sure.” She says starting to walk to the square. 

When you go into the grill, you see Caroline with her mom and immediately back out. You go back to the square to help Elena when you see her against a tree with Damon biting her neck. You rush over there and pull him off of her. He falls to the ground. You look at her, “Are you okay?" 

"Yeah.” She says while holding on to her neck. You give her a cloth and a piece of tape that you carry in your bag, “Here. I keep my blood lust under control, but I’m not sure he will.” You nod to Damon. 

“Thanks.” She says. 

“No problem.” You grunt while trying to get Damon’s arm around your neck and an arm around his waist, “Let’s get him back to the house.” You say while dragging his body back to the car. 

————————-

Stephan rips another blood bag open. He downs it in less than 10 seconds and throws it to the ground. His resolve is weakening and he knows it. 

Klaus steps over Elijah’s body and gets down to Stephan’s level, “You could put a stop to this. You could. And be on your merry way to your brother with a cure. But you refuse to answer a simple question. Where. Is. Name?” He says, enunciating the last three words.

“I don’t know!” He roars. 

“Well then, until you remember,” he throws him another bag, “Drink.” He commands. Stephan growls. 

“It’s this or the location of my wife and a decade bender. You know what? Both sound good to me." 

—————————-

You pat Damon’s forehead with a towel that is soaked with cold water. 

"Elena?” He asks with his eyes closed. 

“Shhhhh…” You try to get him to be more calm. “She’s fine. We’re all fine. You’re going to be fine. Rest." 

He slowly nods and closes his eyes. You leave the towel on his forehead. You go to Elena who is by the door frame, "Have you heard from Stephan?” You ask while leaning against the other frame. 

“No." 

"So I take it the witches didn’t want to help?" 

"They did give them a bit of guidance." 

"To what?” She didn’t reply, “Elena,” your voice gets dark, “I’m not a violent person. But when it comes to my family, I will make hell on Earth. Make it easier on both of us and tell me, where is Stephan?" 

She sighs, "With Klaus. Stephan didn’t want me to tell you." 

"With Klaus?” You asl, and your eyes get softer. Damon groans and rolls over on his side, “Can you get him another towel?” You ask to Elena and she runs to the bathroom. You go to his side and kiss his forehead, “I’ll see you, my friend. Goodbye.” And you leave the room. 

“Here.” Elena says to no one. Her eyes widen, “No.” She says in disbelief. She heard a car pull away. It’s yours. 

————————–

You hear your phone ring, and you let it ring. When it rings again, you answer, “I’m not going back." 

"Name, think about this." 

"I have. Damon needs something from Klaus to live. I’m getting it. Even if….even if it means going with Klaus." 

"We’ll figure out another way.”

You sniffle, “There is none, Elena. I’ll send Stephan with the cure. Tell Damon I said goodbye." 

"Name.." 

"Promise me that. Goodbye, Juliet.” You say with a sad smile on your face. 

And you hang up. 

You drive to Alaric’s apartment. It’s a one in a million shot that they are there, but you have to try. You close your door and look out at Mystic Falls, your time here was lovely.

You race up the steps and you kick Alaric’s door open.

 "Told you I’d find you again, my darling.“

—————————

"Such a shame this cure is going to go to waste.” Niklaus says examining the bottle that contained his blood, “But you’re just being so uncooperative. You won’t be the ripper I need you to be, you won’t tell me where my wife is. It’s a shame." 

"Wait!” Stephan tells him before he drops more of the blood into the sink. “I’ll be a ripper again." 

Klaus sucks in air  through his teeth, "Here’s the thing, that offer expired nearly an hour ago. Now I want your word to be a ripper and my wife. Two for one. It seems like a great deal. You have thirty minutes to get me both before I throw this cure away and kill you. Tick tock.”

Stephan’s opens his mouth, but when he does the door kicks in. Klaus never takes his eyes off of Stephan, “I told you I’d find you again, my darling." 

——————– 

You enter the apartment, "I need the cure for Damon, Niklaus.” You hold your hand out, “Please give it to me." 

"That’s not the way this works, love. You know that." 

"Niklaus, we’re running out of time.” You say, stressed about the situation.

“So, your lover gets to live and have you for the rest of eternity. While I live with the fact that I saved him? That doesn’t sound like a good deal." 

"He’s not my lover, he’s my friend. Who I care about and who is on the brink of death. Please." 

"What do I get in return?” He asks with a smirk on his face. 

“Name, don’t!” Stephan yells. 

You step closer to Klaus, “Klaus, I will willingly stand by your side and take the title of your wife once more. I won’t leave you again." 

He smiles, "Katerina, take this to Damon. You are free to leave." 

Your face falls, "She won’t give it to him.” And Klaus shrugs his shoulders while he stares at you like a fox caught in a trap. You begin to sob into your hands, “She won’t give it to him.” Is all you can say. Klaus goes to put a hand toward your shoulders, “No.” You say while stopping his hand. You wipe your tears and go check on Stephan. 

“Name…” He starts. 

“Don’t.” You cut him off, “This was my decision.” You clean up the blood bags to try to take your mind off of what you just did.

“My decision." 

"Well, our reunion will have to be cut short, love. We have things to do.” He says while going toward the door. You sigh and help Stephan up. You walk passed Klaus, not giving him any acknowledgement. 

He chuckles and looks at Stephan, “I wonder how long she’s going to give me the silent treatment." 

When you go to the car, you try to go in the backseat, but Klaus opens the one to the front passenger seat for you, "Get in, love.” You sigh, but comply. 

Stephan gets in the backseat and pats your shoulder, and you squeeze his hand. 

The drive is silent but the Klaus stops at a warehouse, “What are we doing here?” You ask with confusion laced in your voice. 

“All in due time.” He says while taking his car keys out of the ignition. 

He goes over to your side and opens the door for you, “I can do it by myself, Niklaus." 

"I have not seen you for over 100 years because you made me think that you were dead. Let me have this.” He explains.

“Fine.” You state, but you move away when he touches your hand, “You’re going to have to earn that back.” You say while walking to the door of the warehouse. You notice that there is a lot of boxes.

“A storage facility?” You ask in confusion.

“This is where I store my things.” He answers while getting a crate from the back. He pulls the lid open and you see a coffin in it. 

“Niklaus, what is that?”

“A coffin, love.” he answers with a smirk. 

You roll your eyes, “Who is it for?”

He opens the trunk of his car, and you see Elijah’s body in it, “You daggered him again?” You say in disbelief.

“He wanted to be reunited with our family.” He has the men that he complied put Elijah’s body in the coffin. “I guess you finally got your wish, brother.” He says as he closes the lid. 

You scoff and shake your head, “You haven’t changed in 100 years.”

“Nope, not a big fan of change, but you knew that.  Or at least I thought you did.” He calls out to Stephan, “I have a gift for you. Well, more of a test for you to prove that you will do what you say you will. He beckons out a young girl who is clearly terrified . He bites her neck and releases her for Stephan to follow, which he does.

“Niklaus, she’s a teenager.” You say with disappointment in your voice, “Why would you make him do that?”

“Did you not hear me, love? I did it so that he could prove his loyalty to me. Some people don’t always take their word seriously.” You could tell he was taking a jab at you with the last bit.

“You want to discuss this? Fine.” you cross your arms, “Let’s talk about how in your vows you promised that nothing would come before me. I believe a stone, a doppelganger, and a curse all cut in line.” You count the objects on your hand.

“My vows? What about yours? You promised that you would be with me always and forever. Up until 1896 you kept that promise.” He says with his voice steadily rising in volume. 

“Longer than you ever kept yours.” You say will walking away. 

He grins when you are no longer in eyesight, “Just like old times.“

Avatar

the birds of prey teaser starting off in theaters pretending to be the opening to it: chapter 2 right after the joker trailer with harley quinn interrupting still amazes me sometimes

Avatar
Avatar
hydro-homies
Avatar
sindri42

Other kids will peak in high school right before they realize that less than one in ten thousand of them will make it as pro athletes, and mourn the end of their glory days for the rest of their lives. The kids at the robotics competition are learning how to build an entirely new machine in order to solve a problem in a way that has never been done before.

Are you depressed at this because you can’t tell what’s going on and have forgotten how to figure things out, because you’ve convinced yourself that creativity and innovation are pointless, or because you’re worried that your child has already surpassed you?

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.