Let's go on an adventure

As a transwoman in explicitly trans spaces I get treated like a wasp in a cup.

For example, I went to a speed dating event the other day. I'm pretty good at talking with people and dating apps suck. The venue had hosted other queer dating events including a sapphic event, which I had explicitly avoided. I did not want to roll those dice. But recently they held a T4T event which seemed like a much safer prospect.

I get there and its me, my roommate (transmasc, moral support) and my roommate's friend (transmasc-ish, also moral support). Apart from us there was one transwoman, one transman, and 3 AFAB NB Lesbians. Not a confidence inspiring turnout.

I spent the event making pleasant conversation, but as time went on I noticed that only the other transwoman and transman had really treated me normally. Everyone else was pleasant enough that I didn't fully suss out what was wrong until my roommate noted that they had all seemed a bit transphobic towards me. After that the pieces fell into place.

I can only assume its the masculine gender expression tied to the possession of a weapon (cock). I wasn't overly forward. I talked about a theoretical pet alligator, archeological digs, wind chimes, and architecture that I enjoy (Byzantine domes). Perfectly mundane and engaging topics. But I was treated like something unsightly. A task to be gotten through.

It hurts to show up to the event organized for people like me and still be excluded. I had avoided every other event for precisely this reason. I still found myself ostracized. This is not the first time this has happened.

I know that most of the people who follow this blog are cool. Believe it or not I've vetted each and every one of you.

You shouldn't need to be told this.

Address your internal biases. Please.

If you have multiple exes, vote based on your most recent ex or the one you resent most, if any.

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the 5 love languages: song recommendations, parallel play, talking about The Character, offering to kill each other’s parents, gifting little trinkets

Here we go again Zoroposting

Greater bee fly, Bombylius venosus, Bombyliidae

Photographed in Belgium by Gilles San Martin

Inspiration for Cutiefly?

Certainly looks like it was based on one of the bee flies! There are a lot of species.

Bombylius species like the one above may be cute but they’re hardcore - females lay their eggs near the nests of solitary bees where the bee fly larvae hatch and consume the bee larvae in the nest. Yum :)

Recently went through a Steven Universe phase again and rewatched some of it. Motivated me to make some fanart of my favorite character: amethyst.

I do sort of wish western anime fans would analyze anime and manga from a framework of japanese historical and cultural context. Specifically a lot of works from the 90s being influenced by the general aimlessness and ennui that a lot of people were experiencing due to the burst in the bubble economy and the national trauma caused by the sarin terrorist attack. I think in interacting with media that’s not local to our sociocultural/sociopolitical sphere it’s easy to forget that it’s influenced and shaped by the same kinds of factors that influence media within our own cultural dome and there ends up being this baseline misalignment of perception between the causative elements of a narrative and viewer interpretation of those elements. It’s a form of death of the author that i think, in some measure, hinders our ability to fully understand/come to terms with creator intent and the full scope of a work’s merits

Tumblr tags of the month award goes to:

On related note, a few years ago, the Entomological Society of America officially discontinued the use of "gypsy moth" and "gyspy ant" as common names for Lymantria dispar and Aphaenogaster araneoides. L. Dispar is now known as the "spongy moth," so named for the appearance of their eggs, but I don't think a new common name has caught on for the ant species yet.

These changes we brought about, in large part, by the advocacy of Romani people in academia. You might not think that bug names are a very serious issue, but I believe that language matters. These species became known as "gypsies" because their attributes were likened to certain stereotypes and negative perceptions of actual Roma, so the continued use of those names reaffirmed those negative associations in the public consciousness. Slurs and pejoratives can never be truly decontexualized.

In my mind, one of the biggest obstacles that Romani people face when we are trying to advocate for ourselves is a lack of recognition as a marginalized group that deserves the necessary consideration. Even for seemingly trivial matters, like bugs or comic book characters, the way that people talk about us-- and talk down to us, when we get involved-- is telling. So, I always think that changes like this are a win, because it means that people are willing to learn and grant us the dignity we deserve. And there's nothing wrong with wanting to effect change in your own field, even arts and science.

It makes me happy when they listen

Young Monica Bellucci smoking. Wearingnd folk vest in Blumarine advert, 1993. Photo by Helmut Newton ​

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Tagging: @newsfromstolenland, @abpoli, @vague-humanoid

Surprise to no one, the people being disturbances in public washrooms are not trans women 🙄

Tories are sexual predators, surprising no one

I honestly love this though.

I have so many different things I like and do that come from people I'm no longer in contact with.

A lady living in my old apartment building taught me that if I put the laundry detergent measuring cup in the wash with the clothes then it will get the last bit out and it won't build up gunk. There's a brand of yogurt that I sometimes get that one of my old clients used to like. I think of my grandma when I move to a new place: she always wanted to know what the places I lived in look like...

They're all little things but I'm so thankful for the connections. So cherish those jokes and memories and little lessons. They add color to life I think.

feral old forest witch

wanted to draw her doing the blooding rite of passage and got carried away

something something parallels

someone else has to get me, here, please tell me im not the only one.

Teach your children how to deal with emotions in a constructive way. I wish I had done this with my children.