"Shitter"

i am expecting to be in trouble when i get to work today

yesterday, several coworkers were having a conversation on how to say 'xitter' (we're all sick of 'the website formerly known as twitter' - too long)

'exit-ter' and 'zit-ter' were the winning arguments at that point

me (not part of the conversation, just walking past on the way to lunch) mentioned that, in many cultures, 'x' is pronounced as 'sh'

all afternoon, i could hear 'that is great! post it to shitter!' ring through the office

sooo much paper was wasted yesterday printing things out and taping them to the toilets

there is a surprise office-wide meeting this morning, just got the notification, and this is what it's going to be about - boss spent most of the afternoon yesterday grumbling about 'professionalism'

...and it's most definitely my fault

... ... ... ...not sure i've ever been this proud 😌

I work in a school-adjacent field right now, so my job is tied to the school year. I've worked there for about a year, and my contract is up. Had to schedule a meeting with the boss, where I'd either be offered another year-long contract or be released.

I really really wanted another contract. I like this job, it has health insurance for my kids, I get paid really well, and it offers superb vacation time. Me - being me - overthought the hell out of it. I spent weeks curating data as to why I should be retained for another year. I had spreadsheets. I had presentations. I had data at my fingertips for any eventuality.

New contract was the ultimate goal. I was going to ask for a 1-2% raise, depending on how the meeting went, but I was perfectly fine with nothing.

Head into the meeting, and it doesn't take more than a few minutes to realize something is very amiss...

Working in my scrap paper-piecing quilt while sitting at urgent care.

Starting to come together!

Back looks horrible, as usual.

Daughter is sleeping against my shoulder. Makes it harder to do this. :)

Finished my first crocheted orchid blossom. :)

Gonna make another now.

Spring, spring, where for FUCKING art thou, spring?

Gotta love Minnesota.

Need some help

I've found myself in a little pickle, and I need some thoughts from people who are not involved. If you'd like to read and answer the ending poll, please read more. Poll at the end.

Random typing since kids went to bed early

Part 1: I feel like typing this morning

Part 2: Kids are sleeping in - more typing

I seriously should do a title before this becomes a running joke I can’t shake.

--

The Fright Knight knew little about human anatomy, but he figured there had to be enough important, squishy things inside the halfling’s chest that a few sharp stabs would take care of the human portion of his charge. As long as he avoided the creature’s core, it shouldn’t be too much of a problem for the boy to recover once it was a good and proper ghost.

The sword sang as his fingers curled tightly around the hilt, vanishing his winged horse in a wisp of smoke. The large wings would get in the way of a clean hit. He waited a moment, but the child didn’t appear to notice the change in his posture, or the way he shifted his sword to ready for the attack. The halfling seemed too wrapped up in describing why it wasn’t fit for the being a King. It had even turned so that its back was to the Knight.

It would be easier then expected to solve this little problem. The child was standing still - the perfect target. The Knight knew his speed, knew there would be no countering once he began moving. A flare of excitement swept through his core.

He moved.

Kids are sleeping in - more typing!

A continuation of ‘I feel like typing this morning’ (which will need a title if I’m going to continue this more than a second piece. Thoughts??

--

With the help of his winged horse, the Fright Knight searched high and low for the new ruler of the Infinite Realms. He consulted with every powerful ghost he could locate, searching for the faint wisp of the Royalty starting to make its presence known. 

Days. Weeks. Months passed. 

Although the Knight was not prone to frustration, his inability to locate his new charge was starting to gnaw at him. He even debated going to sleep in his pumpkin for awhile, just to get away from the annoying reality that nobody was stepping forward to claim the greatest honor in the Realms. 

It was perhaps a year into his search when he finally caught the vaguest feeling of the Royalty. A brief sensation of power that made the Knight come to a dead stop. His horse shook its head and pawed at the aether as the Knight looked around, contemplating his location.

There was nothing in this section of the Realms - vague floating islands and feuding, practically feral ghosts. Surely nobody of importance. Nobody the Royalty would think fit to rule the entirety of their world. (He’d checked several times over the past year anyways.)

The Knight’s eyes fell on a glowing circle hovering above one of the tiny islands, the steady light and perfect shape setting it apart from the other, natural portals. 

He realized there was someplace he hadn’t checked: the human world.

I feel like typing this morning

We’ll see how far I get before my kids wake up.

--

The Fright Knight stalked through Pariah’s Keep, enjoying the way his boots slammed into the stone floor. In the thousands of years he’d been in Pariah’s service - both during his rage-filled waking reign and during his quieter, yet somehow more disastrous, sleeping reign - the Knight always followed the same path as he patrolled the quiet castle. This route had been one of his first commands, and one he followed with diligence as often as he could.

Listening to the echoing, rhythmic clang-clang-clang of his boots as he patrolled his designated sectors was arguably the best part of his job. Of course, nothing else ever happened. It was good his sort of ghost couldn’t feel boredom, otherwise he’d have long succumbed to madness. Even so, his thoughts tended to drift as he walked the halls for the countless time.

The stone floor showed his path as an indent in the hard stone. A shallower spot where his feet had hit the floor for thousands of years. He didn’t look at the floor, however. He didn’t like thinking about how long he’d walked this path, how long he would walk this path, how long the sleeping reign of the darkest King would continue to last. How long until his service would end.