im literally not exaggerating when i tell you guys this video saved my life

This is a damn MOOD FOR LIFE, I tell you what.

Honestly, if I ever started a coven, this would be our 24/7 theme song.

my parents aren’t teaching me life lessons.

#i need some adults to TEACH ME SHIT ABOUT LIFE

I’m an adult.

Some shit about life, from a bonafide adult:

Do not buy generic brand spaghetti sauce either.

Always check the type of light bulb that goes in lamps. A 60w is not interchangeable with a 40w.

Dollar store batteries work just as well as store brand.

~~Medications~~

Over the counter medications (stuff you can buy right off the shelf no prescription needed) have a name brand and a generic name. ALWAYS buy generic if it’s available it is literally the same thing and way cheaper usually.

Some names to remember when you’re looking for meds!

Acetaminophen = Tylenol

Used to treat pain and reduce fever. Do not take with Ibuprofen.

Ibuprofen = Advil, Midol, Motrin

Used for pain and fever, is an anti-inflammtory. Is good for period cramps because it is an NSAID (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug).

Naproxen = Aleve, Naprosyn

Treats fever, pain, arthritis pain, gout, period cramps, tendinitis, headache, backache, and toothache. Is also an NSAID.

Acetaminophen + Asprin + Caffeine = Excedrin

Usually marketed as “Migraine Relief” as a generic.

Asprin = Bayer

Use for pain, fever, arthritis, and inflammation. Makes you bleed easily so should not be used for periods. Might reduce risk of heart attacks.\

Triple Antibiotic Ointment = Neosporin

Used on cuts, sores, and scrapes to reduce risk of infection and promote healing.

Also a general mutli-vitamin isn’t a bad idea and if you don’t get a lot of fruits or milk/sunshine in your diet you might want to get vitamins C and D specifically for daily use.

if you do accidentally lapse and put dawn in your dishwasher, run it empty and put hair conditioner where the detergent goes. that’ll clean it out (tip given to me by dorm custodian when roommate did the thing).

if you live off ramen, add stuff to it! add veggies you like, don’t use the whole flavor packet to cut down on sodium and msg or don’t use it at all and add your own spices.

if you’re making something with potatoes in it (beans, stew) potatoes are done when you can easily stab a fork through them.

you can microwave a hotdog as long as you put it in a microwave safe container of water. microwaves work by making water molecules vibrate. also, when reheating rice leftovers, add a small amount of water, like maybe a spoonfull, so it doesn’t get hard and crunchy.

the rice cooking advice above is for long grain rice. if you’re making short or medium grain rice, a 1:1 ratio (one cup water for one cup rice) is better, so the rice doesn’t come out too mushy.

buy a few cans of chicken. wholesale club stores like sam’s, costco, or bj’s tend to carry multipacks for a good price. they’re incredibly useful for when you forget to defrost meat.

buy meat on sale and put it in the freezer. buy vegetables on sale, and put them in the freezer. frozen veggies are often as flavorful and good as fresh ones, keep longer, and often come in microwaveable bags or with microwave directions.

soak ink stains in milk to help get them out or at least lighten them.

soak blood stains in water as soon as possible, with a bit of detergent or stain remover. scrub at them. use cold water, heat binds proteins to fabric. tbh, there’s no real need to change the washer from cold-cold setting unless the thing you’re washing says to wash in warm water.

acetone, found in most nail polish removers, dissolves super glue.

YOU’RE ALL DOING GOD’S WORK BLESS YOU

Takes pictures, have prints made and put them in photo albums. Be IN the pictures, have someone take pictures of you and your friends. Get over not looking perfect in thw picture. Someday that friend might be gone and those pictures might be all you’ll have, you will want to be in them. I made that mistake with my best friend, i always felt weird asking for a picture together… he died of cancer January of 2014 and now i have no pictures of us together. Its my only regret in life.

This is really helpful, thank you all!

I’m the newest of new adults but I’m gonna throw these little tips in there. IF YOU HAVE AN OLD CAR: 

-coolant or water if your car overheats (coolant is preferable cause it won’t hurt the engine in the long run but hey i know money is tight) 

-flashlight in case you break down at night and need to check under the hood and your phone is dead

-SPARE TIRE. 

-jumper cables.you will at some point leave your lights on. you just will. 

AAA or any other road side service is never a bad investment i swear. (try to mooch it off your parents as long as you can though) 

Know how to change a tire. You’re going to need to do it at some point in time and you can’t always rely on someone else to do it for you.

Don’t be afraid to go to your local food bank. They are there for a reason.

Don’t be ashamed to ask for help period. Life is hard, everyone needs help occasionally.

You can put a LOWER wattage bulb in a lamp that says it’s for a higher one, but don’t put a HIGHER wattage bulb in. Also, watts refer to the amount of electricity used. LUMENS refers to the amount of light put out, and can vary quite a bit between brands, even though the wattage is the same. Look for the one with the highest lumens unless you actually want a slightly dimmer bulb in a certain location. Those dollar store batteries? Fine if they’re alkaline. “Heavy-duty” batteries, however, won’t last nearly as long. You can microwave a hot dog and bun simply by wrapping them in a toweling for a minute, less if you don’t want them scalding hot.

Reblogging to save lives.

Two adulting (kitchen-related) tips from me!

1. Buy a roll of parchment paper from the cooking shit aisle. A big roll will last you for-fucking-ever. Pretty much any time you’re using a baking pan you can line it with that stuff and save yourself A: food sticking to the pan and B: it’s a quick rinse and it’s clean.

2. Bread can get fucking expensive, so make your own. A bigass bag of flour and a bag of active dry yeast (store it in the friiiiidge!!!) works out a FUCK of a lot cheaper than buying bread at the store, and you can do so much more with it. Bread, pizza, rolls, cinnibuns, homemade pizza pockets. It seems intimidating but it’s stupid easy.

Seriously. It’s stupid simple to make, and most of the “3 hours” to make it is sitting around surfing the internet or doing whatever the fuck you want while the dough rises. If you have an afternoon free once a week to sit and play video games or surf the net, you have the time to make your own bread on the cheap. Here’s my simple-as-fuck recipe:

Boom. You have bread dough. Here are some baking times and uses for ya:

You can add whatever you want to the dough for some variety, just if it’s dried spices remember you really only need 1-ish tablespoons. I personally like making bread with about 1 tablespoon of dill in the dough. Roll it out flat, sprinkle it with cheddar, roll it into a log, squeeze the ends shut, and bake it like a regular loaf of bread. Cheesy dill bread OMNOMNOM.

*ahem* That got a bit long. But yeah. Bread’s expensive, yo. Save your wallet.

(Also it’s ridiculous amounts of therapeutic to bake, for me anyway)

Being able to bake your own bread is pretty awesome, if you got the time for it. 

Reblogging in case of independence

Maki Naro @ The Nib

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

omg im so glad to se so many people love their mummy

Why’re you being mean to my mum?

goddamn it

Nope. Googled it. 15 minuets. Nope. Not taking any chances

Koop

This has 1.2 million reblogs … Ps not riskin it

1.4 almost ps not risking it

Fuck this post

2.5 million notes I hate myself

I reblogged this twice now

I’m so sorry this isn’t b99 related and this isn’t real but I can’t not skip this I’m sorry

Not taking a fucking chance

Sorry, guys, but Im not taking a chance

No chances… She’s out… And she must be protected.

How dare you

Whatcha doin to me Farkle!

i can’t risk it

sorry babes my moms just my favorite person ever

Sorry I can’t risk it

Fuck sorry guys  I love my mom

Omg I hate these things but I am paranoid. So sorry guys.

2.8 million notes

CANT RISK IT

Sorry guys

sorry 😩

IM NOT RISKING IT

I DON’T GIVE A DAMN NO WAY

Ow

I don’t even care, y’all, I love my mom

this is so fcked up but i have to

Why you do me dirty

I personally don’t like my mom all that much (she did scream at me instead of showing sympathy) but I’m terrified of anyone dying by my hand so fuck it

MAMMY NO

FUCK

I don’t like this kind of post but I ain’t risking it.

I hate chain posts buT IM NOT RISKING IT

My mothers enchiladas are too good i cant risk it

As much as I can’t wait to get away from her, I don’t want death on my hands. Sorry

^^^

If my mother dies so do all the family recipes at this point-

Nope

UNMUTE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

I HATE THE INTERNET

If you love your Dad reblog this. If not he dies in 13 days.

don’t fucking play with me like this the fuck is wrong with y’all

I know these things aren’t real and I scrolled past it but it didn’t feel right so now I’m back here reblogging this stupid ass post because I love my dad damn it

NAH LOOK TODAY MY DAD WAS LIKE HEY BREAK ME OUT A MTN DEW AND HE ALWAYS SAYS THAT BUT LIKE TODAY WAS MY LAST DAY WORKING WITH HIM AND I WAS LIKE THIS MIGHT BE THE LAST TIME I HEAR THIS AND THIS IS BAD JUJU I CANT FUCK WITH IT LOVE U DAD

goddamnit.

I literally scrolled past it and then scrolled back up to it and reblogged it like 

Fuck you

God fucking dammit

well thats a piece of crap im gonna freakin reblog this just in case

as the french say, merci goku

Everybody loves Gohan!!!

by 七尾

By senhaね

In the Netherlands, abortion is freely available on demand. Yet the Netherlands boasts the lowest abortion rate in the world, about 6 abortions per 1000 women per year, and the complication and death rates for abortion are miniscule. How do they do it? First of all, contraception is widely available and free — it’s covered by the national health insurance plan. Holland also carries out extensive public education on contraception, family planning, and sexuality. An ethic of personal responsibility for one’s sexual activity is strongly promoted. Of course, some people say that teaching kids about sex and contraception will only encourage them to have lots of sex. But Dutch teenagers tend to have less frequent sex, starting at an older age, than American teenagers, and the Dutch teenage pregnancy rate is 9 times lower than in the U.S.

I endorse evidence-based medicine, and evidence-based activism.

I didn’t realize how misinformed I was about skincare until I started practicing a little witchcraft. I thought that apricot scrubs were good, oil was bad, and that cystic acne couldn’t be treated topically. Oh, was I wrong. About a year ago, I befriended a 30 year practicing witch who had about 14 years cosmetology experience at the time. Having just discovered Paganism myself, I constantly bugged her about both subjects. She taught me some basics and I’ve been using them ever since. They really work. And it’s a nice and easy introduction to spells if you’re looking to get into somethin’ spooky. 

First things first: Apricot scrubs are TERRIBLE. Any facial scrub that has granules you can see is going to put tiny cuts in your already irritated face and make your acne more susceptible to infection/irritation. She recommended using a mixture of coconut oil and baking soda to make a paste that will very very gently remove dead skin without causing redness. People with rosacea should avoid using any type of scrub, even though this one is very mild. Never exfoliate more than 2-3 times a week, and never ever do it two days in a row. When you’re done, make sure you put as much oil as you can in the trash can- rinsing it off in the sink will clog the drain over time. And remember- the thicker the paste, the more coarse the scrub will be. Scrub using gentle yet wide circular motions, timing yourself at about 60 seconds. 

Oil is not bad for your skin! Coconut oil has tiny molecules unlike other oils, so it can penetrate hair and skin better than other oils. Coconut oil is excellent at pulling your natural facial oils out of your pores without stripping moisture. After you use the scrub, use a warm, damp wash cloth to gently wipe away the oil and baking soda. You should always moisturize immediately after cleansing, but I’ve noticed that after using this cleanser my skin doesn’t ususally need it. Besides coconut oil, lavender oil, grapeseed oil, and sweet almond oil are also very good for acne prone skin. Tea tree oil can be diluted heavily and applied to spot treat, but do not use more than once a week in small quantities or it will make your skin itchy and red. Always always always moisturize before putting on makeup by the way!

As for the face masks! I have a face mask recipe that will reduce my pore size by like 80-90%. Seriously. If I used it once a week I’d have perfect skin, but I don’t, so even when my skin is at its worst, this mask still kicks ass. I don’t have exact measurements for everything (or anything really) so please be patient with yourself when making them. But that’s the beauty of this recipe- you can change it to fit your skin problems with a little research and a trip to the health food store. Side note: Do the mask right after you use the scrub. Otherwise it won’t work as well.

The base of the mask is this magical powder called kaolin clay. I buy it in bulk at the health food store and it’s cheap as hell. It’s just a mild clay that turns to putty then hardens in ten minutes. I probably use ¾ cup, maybe even a full cup for a mask. Just depends on how many liquids you want to include. Star out small and add as you go.

After putting a starter amount of clay into a small bowl, I set that aside and start on the liquids. I like to use tea instead of water. I make a teensy amount of hot water then pour it over green tea, rose petals, and calendula petals. Green tea is anti-inflammatory, rose balances pH, and calendula is great for skin. Try to buy organic so you’re not dousing yourself in pesticides. I set these aside to brew. The less water you use, the stronger the tincture, and the less time you need to wait. 

I only have a few essential oils, but if you do a little research, it is super easy to pick out some that are good for skin and are non-comodegenetic (won’t clog pores). I take my little bowl of clay and start adding a few drops of lavender oil, a few drops of grapeseed oil, a squirt of sweet almond, and two tiny drops of tea tree. Other options are ylang ylang (good for oily skin), chamomile (very soothing), and clary sage (for reverse aging and puffiness). I would say maybe 5 oils would be a good maximum, just because you need room for the tea. 

Add the tea by holding the flowers back with a spoon and pouring tiny little amounts into the clay and oil mixture, stirring frequently so that you don’t get it too thin. You want it the texture of Elmer’s glue. If a few petals get into the mask, that’s fine. Some people add loose green tea leaves to their masks straight up, so whatever’s clever. Then just smear the mask on, avoiding the eye area if you used tea tree oil, and leave it on for about 10 minutes. It will harden so if you want to drink anything you should use a straw, and the mask will flake a bit towards the end, so be aware of that. Once the ten minutes is up, just splash wet water on your face to turn it back to glue texture, then wash off with warm water. This may take a while. Then after you dry your face with a clean towel, check out your pores in the mirror! This is my favorite part because there are patches of my skin when I don’t have visible pores at all, and where I do, they are so much lighter and smaller. The essential oils must penetrate the blackheads or something, I have no idea, but it does what no Biore strips or Clean and Clear scrub have ever done before. 

Make sure you moisturize after ! I have really bad acne so I follow up with benzoyl peroxide (doctor’s orders) and a light drugstore moisturizer to keep my pores looking like this as long as possible. I recommend doing this mask once a week at least, but definitely no more that once every three days. And don’t pop pimples! Give these remedies some time and you will see a huge difference. 

One more thing: Rose water. I make my own, but it can be bought at $30 a bottle at Sephora. However, I don’t use mine that often because it’s non-organic, so unless you have the hookup on organic roses, you might want to steer clear. Basically all it is is rose tea. I get roses from my boyfriend frequently, so I hang them up to dry thoroughly and then collect the petals in a burlap bag. Once I have a grocery bag’s worth, I toss them in a pot to boil. There are lots of ways to do this online, but mine is very simple. Just bring petals to a soft boil, steep until it’s dark red, then let cool. I store mine in a massive mason jar in the refrigerator. I leave some petals in there to make it stronger, but you can strain them immediately if you like. Definitely strain them before using the water to make you life a little easier.

I use rose water as a toner between cleansing and moisturizing. It’s cool from refrigeration, which calms any puffiness, and it apparently balances pH. Another cool thing about it is it moistens your face right before you moisturize. Lotion doesn’t always add moisture to your skin, it often just retains what moisture you have. So if you moisturize damp skin, you’ll retain more moisture. Seems weird but it works.

The witchcraft comes in where you want it to. I like to put intention in the stirring; meaning I stir right if I want to embrace good vibes and positive outcomes, stir left if I have something negative on my mind that I want to banish. I think there is magic in the herbs and oils themselves so I don’t get too fancy or chant, but it is totally a thing for people to chant while making these kinds of elixirs. Tumblr is full of awesome little rituals! I just tend to keep it simple. 

So anyways this is basically everything I know about skincare, and it was all taught to me by a woman in her late thirties that looks like she’s 24. Kudos if you read this entire thing! Seacrest out.

things that piss me off (acne edition)

1) annoying people giving me useless advice - just yesterday a girl from my school came up to me and told me “hey listen, did you ever try using manuka honey for your face? it’s like 50 $ but it’s really good”(sidenote: she has clear skin) okay i get these ‘tips’ at least twice per day and they make me so frustrated like jesus i’ve used everything available in this universe oh my god do you think some honey is really going to help me? no

2) “you shouldn’t wear makeup it worsens your acne” how about no, it’s easy to say this, but if i were to go to school without makeup everyone would talk about my acne and i mean THE WHOLE SCHOOL + TEACHERS. it’s an easy thing to say when you have like 3 pimples but my confidence is already below zero so not wearing makeup would just throw me into a deep depression.

3) people talking me out of Accutane this happened when i was thinking about going on Accutane and i told my friend. all my friends went batshit crazy and proceeded to talk me out of it. i understand people caring about you but at the end of the day it’s my choice, and if i would go on Accutane it would be after lots and lots and even more hours of research. i know what i’m stepping into.

4) people just being ignorant and rude i once made the mistake of telling my friend that i had a good skin day and she just blurted out “you call that a good skin day? just kidding” and these kind of remarks really get to me. i don’t understand why some people feel the need to make somebody feel bad for themselves. what do you gain?? stop ok??

5) getting noticed and labeled only by your acne if you have ever had bad acne then you know the feeling of talking to a person a noticing their gaze glide to a bad pimple you have. or getting recognized as “the girl with reaaally bad acne” . yup, it’s the worst.

without spite my heart may actually stop