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here be monsters

@missabigailhobbs / missabigailhobbs.tumblr.com

Kate | 23 | USA holy water cannot help me now
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My Actual Real Life Romance is an Absolute Tumblr Post

So one day, @my-chemical-roman-ce hit me up on here in response to a rp request. After a year of talking almost every day, I went out to visit his hometown in Nebraska. 🤢 It is called the bad lands for a reason y’all. Anyways we caused a lot of chaos - including getting matching UA tattoos and confusing the poor tattoo artist when we explained that we were just friends and in fact had just met - right before the pandemic hit and the world shat itself.

At one point we were high on poppers on his bed, in his parent’s house. He tells me this would be the point in the fanfic where readers are screaming at us to kiss. We laugh it off because neither of us are into the other *like that*.

I go back home and he’s trying to get out of his asshole parents’ house. He was working to get out here against an impending travel ban and two months later, I picked him up at the airport and brought him home. We still were not dating, even with him living here. Shortly after moving here, his mother asks him if we are dating. We weren’t at the time, so he told he such. But the pandemic wasn’t going anywhere. About a month in, we decide to start dating. We tell everyone and most of them said they thought we were already dating.

Now he plans to propose only after learning to forge me the sword of my dreams, as I have always wanted. Y'all, I asked this boy to forge me a SWORD and he said hell yes. And all because of ✨Horny Umbrella Academy Roleplay™️✨

#storytime#me irl#my life is a tumblr post#i swear to god every word of this is true#umbrella academy#bringing freaks together since 2019#the umbrella academy#tua#queer love#queer love story#gay
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my-chemical-roman-ce
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elalalune

You can tell I'm obssessed with flower crowns

Grace

• pink carnations (a mother's love)

Luther

• white gladiolus (integrity, strength, innocence)

• lavender (purity, silence, devotion)

Diego

• marigolds (passion, creativity, cruelty, grief, jealousy)

• red dahlias (following your own path, strength)

Allison

• amaryllis (determination, beauty, strength, pride)

• iris (faith, hope, wisdom)

Klaus

• purple carnations (capriciousness)

• daffodils (rebirth, new beginnings)

Five

• zinnias (an absent friend)

• forget-me-not (don't forget me)

Ben

• poppy (peace in death, remembering the fallen warriors)

• morning glory (mortality of life)

Vanya

• purple hyacinth (sorrow, forgive me)

• white tulips (purity, forgiveness, worthiness, serenity)

#the umbrella academy#tua#fanart
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my-chemical-roman-ce
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outoftheframework

the absolute best parts of Umbrella Academy s2

I literally have nothing new to add to these; they just made me smile. And obviously, spoilers if you haven’t see it!

  • Allison not hesitating for a SECOND to jump into the pool while reuniting with Klaus!!
  • The whole family getting into the car with Vanya to help Harlan. Just. *chef’s kiss*
  • “Hey, Diego. Can’t say hi to nobody?” “hi allison.” “What was that?” “HI ALLISON.”
  • Ben (as Klaus) reuniting with and hugging Diego
  • Let’s be real, Ben was the real hero of this season. He’s dead and still prevented a nuclear apocalypse by saving Vanya.
  • But Diego, Allison, and Klaus also trying? Beautiful.
  • Diego and Vanya chilling on the steps in the last episode
  • Five admitting that the entire time he was in the apocalypse alone he was worried about his family
  • The slow reveal that Klaus has become a legit cult leader
  • Ray’s biggest takeaway/surprise from Allison’s whole life story being that there was a black president
  • Ben telling Vanya to make sure that Klaus knew he wasn’t responsible for keeping Ben away from heaven 
  • Diego immediately leaving orientation
  • And then later lying to Five by telling him he passed the whole thing
  • Klaus being caught by those two cowboys
  • Five calling the Swedes the “IKEA Mafia”

what a good show. free free to add your own favorite parts; this is in no way a comprehensive list!

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my-chemical-roman-ce
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edrec

if one more nonamerican calls americans unclean or stupid or some shit for dying of rona when our government is actively trying to murder the most vulnerable of our population by using them as expendable cogs in their minimumwage fueled capitalistic machine im going to turn into one of those bugs bunny w gun memes

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boomstab-papa

"But all those people who won't wear masks..."

...WOULDN'T BE AS MUCH OF A PROBLEM IF PEOPLE ACTUALLY HAD TO SIT THEIR ASS AT HOME BY LAW, AND GOT PAID ENOUGH MONEY TO DO SO

Instead, we are given NO laws with teeth requiring people to stay home except for the essentials, NO federal laws requiring masks (with some state governors banning mask requirements), and NO stipend for staying home, which is on purpose, because they want us DESPERATE to go back out and work. DURING A PANDEMIC.

THIS IS ALMOST ENTIRELY A GOVERNMENT-TRYING-TO-MURDER-US-FOR-PROFIT ISSUE.

Shit-for-brains Becky with no mask working at Target wouldn't be near as much of a problem IF TARGET WAS CLOSED AND SHE WAS GIVEN ENOUGH MONEY TO STAY THE FUCK AT HOME.

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my-chemical-roman-ce
  • So we’re watching Gordon Ramsay. @missabigailhobbs and I are. Vibing. Hardcore vibes. It’s great.
  • Gordon is at a soul food restaurant. I use both the terms “soul food” and “restaurant” loosely. I just recovered from the ladies praying that Gordon doesn’t “succumb to the chitlins”
  • We’re rolling. He succumbs.
  • The owner is cackling in the background as we see Gordon rush to the toilet to get violently ill.
  • The cackling continues. We grow worried for Chef Ramsay. Still. She cackles.
  • We may be witnessing a murder.
  • My beloved girl friend and I are frightened to the core of her ever growing cackle.
  • @missabigailhobbs turns to me to inform me that she is reminded of Nero playing the fiddle while Rome burns.
  • I did not question her. It came from her soul with the force of B ö N ë J U I C ë
  • Enter wise grandma.
  • We take a breath.
  • All is well.
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