Lena: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Colin, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
(About Otto)
Colin: I prevented a murder today.
Ty: Really? How’d you do that?
Colin: self control.
Colin: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it
Ty: Just rip the bandage off.
Colin: It’s Lena.
Ty: Put the bandage back on.
Colin, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Ty: You did WHAT–
Lena: William Snakepeare
Colin: Ty and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Lena: *Sighing* What did Ty do?
Colin: They chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Ty: Who wants a steering wheel?
Colin: While I’m gone, Ty, you’re in charge.
Ty: Yes!!!
Colin, whispering: Lena, you’re secretly in charge.
Lena: Obviously.
Ty: Hey Colin,
Colin: Yes?
Ty: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?
Colin:
Colin: Where’s Lena?
Colin: HELP! I TOLD LENA I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!
Ty, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?