“It’s October!!”
My cousin's dog growls and shows his teeth if he's happy sometimes lol
Haha, what an interesting dog. That’s definitely good you know he’s happy and not angry, though!
About your dog: some dogs are just weird with vocalizations. My friends golden retriever would growl whenever she was happy and she rarely ever barked. My neighbor's husky had super high pitched howls instead of barking. Dogs are just weird animals.
For context: ( http://why-animals-do-the-thing.tumblr.com/post/160074070232/so-ive-taken-my-dog-labrador-to-the-vet-but ) That’s really good to know! To be honest, it’s a little bit of a relief to know my dog isn’t abnormal for not barking.
@themarvelhorse It’s alright, I suppose the job wasn’t for me. It was good while it lasted. Thank you, it’s still a little unbelievable I’m really still here. A little surreal to be 21! And thank you, thank you - that really means a lot.
@kobold-hijinks Thank you so much, it’s always comforting knowing people who have survived what I’m going through. It gives you hope, you know? Thank you for the advice. Ha, and don’t sweat it. You’re certainly not a creeper, whatever the age difference between us may be. (Speaking of though, I do need to post more QL stuff... Maybe I’ll order another QL book to read?)
And @maine-writes, that’s an absolutely wonderful story, I’m so glad I could be that little influence to writing your stories. I always love reading what you write. Thank you so much for the encouraging words, I’ll keep everything in mind.
Thank you for your kind words, I was really overwhelmed with how nice you all have been. I guess I’m not used to putting myself out there, heh. I need to learn how to do it more often.
Hello, all. Bare with me whilst I just get a little serious at the moment. I do apologise for the length, and the rather sombre tone.
I turned 21 today! In fact, the day is almost over. Less than 15 minutes left. This is so incredible for me; I never thought I’d make it this far. I’m just really proud of myself for doing so.
Since I was about seven years old, I’ve dealt with a few relatively debilitating mental illnesses. At the forefront, for the most part, was a constant severe depression and suicidal thoughts / tendencies. For as long as I can remember now, I’ve dealt with these. I feel like it’s because of this reason that I’ve always thought two things: 1) I am beyond saving, beyond help. 2) I will successfully kill myself before I turned 21.
These past few years have come with a tremendous amount of growth. A few months back, I was offered a job at the flight school where I train. I also successfully received my pilot licence. I fought tooth and nail to get my licence, and for a brief few weeks after these happened, I felt truly, truly happy for the first time. It was more than that, though.
I felt free.
It didn’t last. After a few weeks, I felt simply awful again. I could no longer be happy. I recently quit the job, in fact - it was too taxing on my failing mental health and I had my other job to fall back on. However, things were different this time. Now, I knew that I was able to maintain some level of basic satisfaction and happiness. And dammit, I wanted that back.
I’ve taken some small baby-steps to recovery. I’m seeing a therapist, who has been extremely helpful - she’s brought my attention to my neglected anxiety disorder, explaining that a good chunk of my depression may be caused by it. In my defence, I honestly had no idea I had anxiety to such a bad degree - I thought everyone was like this, like me. I’m learning to calm myself, to analyse my thoughts and challenge them.
She treats me and my feelings with respect. I’ve only opened up about my mental health issues and suicidal thoughts to one other person, and it didn’t really end well.
She didn’t treat me like a villain for wanting to kill myself. She acknowledged that I was in a lot of pain and I just wanted it to end. That it was an option she understood I was seriously considering, and that I had been for years and years. That I wasn’t a bad person for feeling this way. I’m not a bad person for feeling like this, and it’s possible for me to get better without feeling like a bad person for falling back into old thinking patterns. Everything I’ve been told has always been “oh, suicidal people are cowards / they want to make everyone miserable / they’re attention-seekers / they don’t care about anyone but themselves / they’re evil, manipulative people”. Hearing something so drastically different really shook me.
Recently, she suggested that I should be expressing my emotions in a healthy way. Since I don’t really have any good friends, I thought I’d start by writing this to my followers, so at least it feels like I have someone to talk to. I want to prove to myself that I can share a little of my story with people. I also wanted to celebrate staying alive for 21 years!
I still want to die, I still want to run away and hide from it all, I still don’t know how to handle my own thoughts. But I’m getting better. And here’s to 21 years, alive and kicking.
CALLING FOR GUEST ARTISTS!
Hello! RetailPony needs some guest artists to keep the blog active for a while. Unfortunately, mod has 3 jobs and also studies, so RetailPony has to be placed on the back-burner for a while, art-wise. I just don’t have the willpower just at the moment!
Please either contact me here or go to my mod blog, @thesolarsister and send an ask or message if you’re interested in doing a post or two! You can go as detailed or as basic as you wish - I will provide you with an ask (or more, if you would like) and Blitz’s response, and you can take it as you would like from there.
I’d really, really appreciate it, and as a thank you, I’ll either sketch your OC in a variety of poses (or a pony of your choice)…
Or, if you help produce multiple blog posts, I will make your OC (or another pony of your choice) an integral part of the next story progression! This part of the story will introduce Blitz back into her flying - something I cannot do until most current questions have been answered. Your pony can either be: - flight instructors (non-pegasus ponies are fine!) - other ponies also learning to fly (again, non-pegasus is fine!) - desk workers Also, all who contribute will have their OC as a spectator in some way or another when Blitz attempts her flying.
(Of course, Blitz will retain her retail jobs. This is just a fun way to break up the pattern of work-work-work.)
So anyway. Guest artists, please contact me!
In lighter news, I'll be moving out soon, so that's pretty exciting.
You don’t know how much time you have left with those you love. Give a cherished family member a hug, do something nice for a dear friend. Treasure the moments you have with the people you care about.
For being so nice and cute, copy this into 10 other bloggers that you think are wonderful. Keep the game going and make others feel beautiful! 🌸🌸🌺🌺
That's adorable! Thank you!~
Today's a great day to fly!
*doesnt talk to tumblr friends for 6 months*
*thinks about them and hopes they are okey dokie*
I just wanted to draw Blitz with a Chao.
Okay so I started my new job down at the flight school where I train, and I still can't believe I've already taken the first step into the aviation industry and towards my dream job. I now have a job with aviation experts and pilots and engineers; it's so much easier to believe now that one day I'm going to get paid to fly planes just like they do and like, that's all I've ever wanted in life. I've always wanted to fly. I never thought I'd get this far - I just feel really hopeful and so happy right now. Though today during my shift, because I'm an emotional sap who can't control herself; I had to go to the bathroom and just cry for like ten minutes because I was so happy. They never suspected a thing. I'm such a good manager. #professionalism
I know, Sam - adulthood makes me cry too.
Welcome to the United States of Anxiety.
[AGGRESSIVELY ATTEMPTS TO ENJOY SOMETHING WHILE IGNORING HALF OF THE FANDOM]