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Bonus:

If you’re fortunate enough, your internal organs will spend their entire lifespan in absolute darkness.

Not if I swallow this glow stick!

I was looking at selfie sticks on amazon and i think this review is so sweet and cute

“this is my custom fursuit, I had 30 neon-green wolves killed for it”

WHAT KIND OF FUCKING MILLIONAIRE IS MAKING FURSUITS OUT OF REAL FUR

“Cruella De Vil is a furry” is not the hot take I expected to see on my dash today, but I think it’s the one I deserve

my favorite is when Kermit’s facial expression is simultaneously an obvious hand in a puppet but also an instantly recognizable and relatable emotion

What sort of goths are coming to this SubWay

Donald Trump lending assistance to child seperated from parents (1993)

Your body is an incredibly bizarre machine.

“What you see is a myosin protein dragging an endorphin along a filament to the inner part of the brain’s parietal cortex which creates happiness. Happiness. You’re looking at happiness.”

Look at her STRUT!!! She is dragging that endorphin for filth and using that filament as her runway, bitch.

6 inch heels…..she walked in the club like nobody’s business…..godam…..she murdered everybody and i was her witness

yeah so the only news out of cannes that I care about is that marion cotillard, penelope cruz, jessica chastain, fan bingbing and lupita nyong’o are going to be in a spy thriller called 355. 

no one knows much about the movie yet, but apparently jessica chastain and marion cotillard have a fight on motorcycles, and lupita plays a techie spy like Q from the james bond movies.

so like. twenty-gay-teen continues to deliver.

i thought the bermuda triangle was gonna be a huge problem when i was younger

The Leatherdos is a hair clip that doubles as a multi-tool that combines 5 different tools in a tiny hair clip: screw-drivers, a wrench, a trolley coin, a ruler, and a cutting edge.

—->http://odditymall.com/leatherdos-is-a-hair-clip-multi-tool

This some of that James Bond shit.

Swiss Army Hairclip

Imagine you get kidnapped or some shit, how useful that might be?

FINALLY!!!

Lightly hot glue a flower to it and you could make it cute and frilly without sacrificing functionality. Low temp hot glue pops right off.

this is some Kingsman shit right here

@mysterysolver

Fun story: I have one of these, and wore it every day while working as a vet assistant at a pet clinic. One day a kitten comes in with a cord knotted around her neck, and everyone’s trying to get it unknotted before she heads in for her spay.

I just whip off the hair clip, grab the cord, and slice through it in one go. Everyone stood there, surprised, and stared at the cord in my hand that I just sawed through with a hair clip. 

This would be AMAZING if you got kidnapped, or, in this case, a pet gets tangled in something. It’s very light and flexible, but the insides of the teeth are sharp enough to get the job done.

FUCK ALL OF YALL!!! this is totally spies!!! james bond who????????

jake peralta is going to be a stay at home dad and if you think any differently clearly youre watching a different fucking show

@ravenschmaven has anybody ever told you youre the most valid

So I dunno how many people know this but if you go to burgerking and order anything at all off the menu, even just a drink, you get two little surveys on the back of the receipt

Each survey can get you a free whopper burger or a chicken sandwich with the purchase of any drink (even the $1 drink)

Just fill out the survey and get the code and write it on the back.

If you are short on money and really need a substantial meal, you can keep doing this cycle of getting receipts and free sandwiches for as long as you like

Idk I thought this might help people who are hard up for cash. This works in the US.

reblog 2 save a hungry tummy maybe?

these surveys actually saved me as a child growing up with a neglectful, mentally ill mother. shout out 2 every hood burger king

CAUSE EVERY TIME WE TOUCH I GET THIS FEELING

EVERY TIME WE KISS I SWEAR I COULD FLY

CAN’T U FEEL MY HEART BEAT FAST, I WANT THIS TO LAST

NEED YOU BY MY SIDE

This is the closest gif that can really capture the utter chaotic energy that is released when people hear this song

hollywood be like “Africans”

Thats not even an african themed movie like what.

where the fuck do u think egypt is located I’m jus curious

Can u believe there are plants that are illegal Plants

Can you believe there is love that is illegal Love

can you believe it’s not butter butter

the fact that Tumblr can fit weed, bestiality and diary products all into one post doesn’t even phase me anymore

i really dont think they meant bestiality