Behind the scenes portrait of Colin Farrell in Dumbo. (My edit)

“Throwback photo…. Everyone kept asking if Colin did his own stunts. Well why don’t you see for yourself? #nophotoshop #unsungheroes”

- Colin’s on set assistant

Hi my name is Martin “Marty” Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way Faranan and I have short ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches up an inch or to and boozy brown eyes like limpid tears of whiskey and a lot of people tell me I look like Percival Graves (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Colin Farrell but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a vampire put my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a witch, and I write magic scripts for Hogwarts in Hollywood where I’m in the seventh year there (I’m 37). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots with bottles of beer in my pockets. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them. “Hey Marty!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Billy Bickle! “What’s up Billy?” I asked. “Nothing.” he said shyly. But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.