🚛😵👻👍

What she says: I’m fine

What she’s thinking: Wall-e spent days/weeks trying to approach EVE without seeming scary or predatory, more days/weeks worrying about her safety while she was dormant, and a trip across an entire galaxy just for the chance to try and hold her hand? And people still think it’s a straight movie???

I don’t understand

That’s fine

untitled moodboard..........

Disasters, but make it hilarious.

Shoutout to the gay nanny from Bly Manor because she saw some clearly possessed children and said, "I think the fuck not." And sent them straight to bed.

And shoutout to the gay Gardner who saw a clearly possessed young boy and told him she would beat the shit out of him if he keeps up this bullshit

the gender fluids...

Credit: @buddythefourth

Daang.

he wins best Spider-Man cosplay ever

I honestly thought they were both stills for a moment.

So i went on a date to a haunted house and made friends with the girls behind us. As we’re going through, one of them is holding my hand and a guy leaps out and separates us. I panic as my date is pulling me along, I reach back for her and grab her hand in a group of three other performers and start getting out if there. After a bit I look back to check on her and I discover I’m holding the hand of a six foot tall zombie creature and not a 5'2" girl.

Cue the most terrifying realization of my life.

I had basically kidnapped this performer from his section and abandoned the girl and her friend behind us.

Yes, I screamed. My date thought it was Hilarious.

Yes, we found the girls. Turns out when I grabbed the performers hand, he grabbed theirs so our group wouldn’t be separated. So there was just this zombie in the middle of our group line for like fifty feet

This is like a Scooby Doo bit I love it

If your teacher seriously assigns you a PragerU video please dunk of their ass so hard 

Hi, social studies teacher here: if your teacher assigns you one of these videos in any context except for the following, drag them to hell. Call your principal, sure, but also. Ruin them on twitter. Make it a big public stink the whole district has to scramble to hush up. Complain to your local news if you have to. Complain to the ACLU– they have a whooooole department on education. Make that teacher a liability to the school. See how fast their shit changes.

Now, exceptions include:

- you are studying propaganda and these videos are an example of such

- you are studying conservatism (alone or as compared to other ideology) and the videos are a case study in alt right thought

- you’re studying things like media literacy and critical media consumption and this is one of the examples you have to deconstruct

- you’re making comparisons between the message of the videos and other messages in history and whether they’re coming from the same root

- basically ask “am I being given this video to inform me or have I been given this video to analyze?” and if the answer is inform, as in your teacher is using this shit as part of introducing new info, FUCK that. Drag them to hell. This shit cannot be used as direct instruction. But if the answer is “critically analyze the video” or “the video is an example of something really happening that we are learning about” then that’s actually very useful to you to learn because it will help you identify this thinking when you see it and understand how conservatives you’re up against are coming to their conclusions.

Basically, videos like this are only good for studying the alt right like the wacked out, neurotic, inbred lab rats that they are at heart. Teachers trying to use them as factual direct instruction need to get as fucked as possible as soon as possible.

Don’t forget, public school teachers are *~*strictly prohibited*~* from anything that might be deemed political indoctrination. If your teacher tries to use PragerU as a legitimate, credible source that you should parrot all your opinions from, DRAG. THEM. AND. THE. DISTRICT. THROUGH. THE. MUD.

Imagine Me & You (2005) dir. Ol Parker

The curious dance moves of the Striped Cuckoo.

I’m sorry???? Excuse me sir???? You have hands and are a bird please explain

The “hands” seen here are really the alula – the bird’s feathered thumb!

So it’s basically doing this: 👍🐦👍

how could you just leave this out

Where has this been all my life?

Jane living in 3047 while us suckers are living in 2018

this blessed post has graced my dash

Oh my god

This blew my damn mind

I fucking KNEW there was a difference between address and address!

You address a person by their name.

You give someone your address.

i hate this god damn bastard language

Y’all be safe playing among us. I now its a social game but like don’t give out your name or what school you go to. Like I’m sure people might Not track you down using that information but im 23 years old and I grew up during a time were they made us fear strangers and putting information online.

For my followers that play Among Us, PLEASE watch out for people like that. If ANYONE you don’t know asks you about your age/where you live/go to school, that’s a red flag. Please be careful, candy call people out if you see them doing this shit.

I was in a lobby where someone admitted they were a 16 year old girl and everyone kept asking her for her phone number, her instagram, etc and i got kicked because i kept telling people that it was creepy and they should stop. Seriously do not share anything like that on public servers, especially if youre an underage girl

To illustrate how big a deal this is, outside of people getting harassed online, if someone has your phone number, they can track down where you live. If someone has your instagram, they can use it figure out where you live if youre not careful. Ive had do exactly this a couple times so i could send something to the right address. Do not give strangers your social media. Do not give them your age. Do not give them any identifying information.

Also! A tactic that was very popular Back In The Day but gen z doesn’t seem to indulge in as much:

Lie!

Whether it’s to some creeper asking too many questions or just some random website you’re signing up for... you can lie, kids. While obviously it’s great to not respond to weirdos seeking your personal information, there are times that for various reasons it’s difficult to avoid giving out any info entirely. So just bullshit. Name, age, gender, location, whatever you want. Just lie about it.

You are not beholden to an honor code with strangers or random websites on the internet. Just fake whatever. It’s not only completely fine, it is many times more advantageous for you in the long run (not only in dodging creeps, but it helps keep your IRL info and online info separate). You can pick and choose w/e online friends you want to be honest with, but signing up for social media or being asked invasive questions by a stranger? Just fuckin make shit up.

Literally lying about your age or location or whatever was so common online 15+ years ago, so that it wasn’t just anyone who could find out your actual private information. Revive this practice.

I distinctly remember lying to my friends on Runescape when asked about my age, recognizing they were lying about their age, and blissfully coexisting on a foundation of deception

Lie and feel fine about it

fresh, clean no-terf version for reblogs!

Your mom and aunts aren’t on tumblr.  Please warn them about this as well. 

Reblogging for all my older people with uteruses, sorry about the gendered language :/

sometimes I tweet about the funny/cute/utterly bizarre shit my 3rd graders do and say

the latest dispatches from room 156

happy monday folks

"Miss, he's one year old, he doesn't have opinions" is sending me