Strange

❖ Author: @waywardkitten​

❖ Featuring: Ivar x Shield maiden!Reader

❖ Written for:  Valentines day ♥

❖ Warnings/Tags: Virgin!Ivar, fingering, losing of virginity, brief oral sex, angst

❖ Rating: Explicit

❖ Word count: 2416

❖ Beta: None

❖ Summary: What starts as Ivar trying to tease you ends up in something else completely, something he really hadn’t expected.

❖ A/N: Wooh, guess who joined the mental asylum that is Vikings fandom? This crazy b*tch. This is my first attempt at writing Ivar and I can imagine this particular prompt probably has been done to death but I really don’t care, I needed to give my precious murder puppy a first time he deserves. I hope I did him justice. The start might seem a bit strange but it is based of this dream thing I had, just roll with it ;) Feedback encouraged and appreciated♡

━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━

     “Your breasts look strange”

    You looked up with a raised eyebrow at the man dragging himself through your door. You huffed, cracking a crooked grin and went back to the task of patching up your armour, not caring the slightest to cover up your naked form.     “So does your legs”

    Anger lit in his eyes, a complete mismatch to the perfectly schooled leer on his lips.     “Brave words for a slavegirl”

    “It’s Shield maiden and do not act like you don’t know it”

    “I would advise that you hold your tongue against a son of— “

    “I know very well who you are prince Ivar, and I don’t believe I have spoken cruelly, and neither have you”, you spoke matter of factly not even looking up from the torn pieces of leather in your lap “weird, strange, unusual- no matter what you call it does not always mean bad. It just means different.”

Keep reading

This is amazing - recommend read if you love some Ivar.

Thank you ☺️

Strange

❖ Author: @waywardkitten​

❖ Featuring: Ivar x Shield maiden!Reader

❖ Written for:  Valentines day ♥

❖ Warnings/Tags: Virgin!Ivar, fingering, losing of virginity, brief oral sex, angst

❖ Rating: Explicit

❖ Word count: 2416

❖ Beta: None

❖ Summary: What starts as Ivar trying to tease you ends up in something else completely, something he really hadn’t expected.

❖ A/N: Wooh, guess who joined the mental asylum that is Vikings fandom? This crazy b*tch. This is my first attempt at writing Ivar and I can imagine this particular prompt probably has been done to death but I really don’t care, I needed to give my precious murder puppy a first time he deserves. I hope I did him justice. The start might seem a bit strange but it is based of this dream thing I had, just roll with it ;) Feedback encouraged and appreciated♡

━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━

     “Your breasts look strange”

    You looked up with a raised eyebrow at the man dragging himself through your door. You huffed, cracking a crooked grin and went back to the task of patching up your armour, not caring the slightest to cover up your naked form.     “So does your legs”

    Anger lit in his eyes, a complete mismatch to the perfectly schooled leer on his lips.     “Brave words for a slavegirl”

    “It’s Shield maiden and do not act like you don’t know it”

    “I would advise that you hold your tongue against a son of— “

    “I know very well who you are prince Ivar, and I don’t believe I have spoken cruelly, and neither have you”, you spoke matter of factly not even looking up from the torn pieces of leather in your lap “weird, strange, unusual- no matter what you call it does not always mean bad. It just means different.”

Afficher davantage

This is a MASTERPIECE 👍👍😍😍👍👍

Well oh wow thank you ☺️💞

here’s a fantastic idea: how about Cards Against Humanity buys Tumblr??

@nyamafriend @mackie-winchester @saltybambootrash guys look

i emailed them and-

:))

DUGHAHHRJ1JEHWIDHJEBXJSIS

Oh my fucking god

Amazing!

Now this I can get behind

PlEASE CAH MAKE THIS A REALITY

CAH would actually listen to us!! This is amazing!!!

(Also please dont forget that pornhub is involved in sex trafficking)

Pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls

i just discovered that there’s also a petition! Get on it guys!

They almost have 500

Please

They’re close to 2,000!

Saw this on Facebook. Reposting for the PSA.

As I’m always a skeptic and had never heard of this, I had to look up more information. Very true, and here are excellent sources if you want to learn more - 1 and 2

Most flowers, houseplants and succulents at home depot have been treated with neonicotinoids, and this is true of most major big box stores like it. To avoid these pollinator unfriendly pesticides, consider supporting small greenhouses that don’t use them. Many smaller specialty plant shops eschew their use and thanks to the internet many of them also sell online.

i wish i was the box office

“I hope they remember you.”

I don’t think we appreciate how fucking Amazing Tony Stark is at multitasking and how Heightened his sense of awareness/ perception must be though I mean. I mean

Let’s just take a look at everything going on in these Two (2) screencaps alone. How much data do you think he’s processing at any one time whilst in that suit (+ JARVIS AND the rest of the avengers on audio). He reads, evaluates and acts on the info, all in the space of a second before moving on to the next task. JARVIS might give him the information, but it’s tony stark’s brain that processes all that data vomit. On the field, the amount of information he must process in a mere minute must be astounding.

And I mean, not only can tony pilot this shit all on his lonesome, but he can do it with nothing more than a pair of glasses.

Whilst taking a drink:

Whilst Driving a Whole Other Vehicle

Too basic for you? I mean, I guess all he was doing was some basic flight in those, right? Well what about saving thirteen people from a falling airplane and safely guiding them all down to earth again- whilst in a cabin on a boat

Could you imagine trying to do that? I can’t keep a conversation and do 1 task at once. I think we often forget quite how ….brilliant tony’s brain is. Like. The speed at which he would have to process information and act on it is fucking insane. No wonder no one else can effectively create an iron man suit, they just physically couldn’t keep up with it. Tony is one harcore genius motherfucker This Has Been A PSA

i wanna add to this the time when tony was doing pull ups and reading data about mandarin attacks after around 80 hours of no sleep

and keeping a conversation with pepper while steering his suit to give her a gentle as fuck backrub

and before that, look at the fingers:

tony stark brought the art of multitasking to a whole new level

He’s everything

I feel like people forget… regardless of all the privilege he had in his life, that boy is a certified fucking genius, like Stephen Hawking level

He literally invented time travel

oh, this is nice

for: @blackwidws

So let me just say how deeply dissapointed I am in the non-european part of Fandom.

When net neutrality was in danger for America, we rushed to your aid; signed petitions, sent e-mails, raised hell, did what we could.

Now Europe is in danger as it seems Article 13 will pass on Monday. I know some of you have helped, but not nearly enough of you have.

And now we will lose so many content creators because of fucking uploading filters.

I don’t think fanfiction will be targeted (as long as its free), but fanart, manips, edits.. yeah, that’ll be no go.

You could have really helped us, yet here we are.

It passed :)))))

Fuck you all. We needed you and ugh. Guess that's it then. Buh bye fanfiction.

when all the content on here dies because of article 13 yall can change the name to tomblr

If you’re European, in a couple of weeks you will be denied any and all access to fandom contents on Tumblr and everywhere else on the internet. Here’s why.

On June, 20th the JURI of European Parliament approved of the articles 11 and 13 of the new Copyright Law. These articles are also known as the “Link Tax” and the “Censorship Machines” articles.

Articles 13 in particular forces every internet platform to filter all the contents we upload online, ending once and for all the fandom culture. Which means you won’t be able to upload any type of fandom works like fan arts, fan fictions, gif sets from your favourite films and series, edits, because it’s all copyrighted material. And you won’t also be able to share, enjoy or download other’s contents, because the use of links will be completely restricted.

But not everything’s lost yet. There’s another round of voting scheduled for the early days of July.

What you can do now to save our internet, is to share these informations with all of your family members and friends, and to ask to your MEP (the members of the European Parliament from your country) to vote NO at the next round, to vote against articles 11 and 13.

Here you can find more news and all the details to contact your MEP:

https://saveyourinternet.eu

Also, sign and share this petition:

https://www.change.org/p/european-parliament-stop-the-censorship-machinery-save-the-internet?recruiter=50668942&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=twitter&utm_campaign=psf_combo_share_initial

We have just a couple of weeks to stop this complete madness, don’t let them dictating the way we enjoy our internet.

#SaveYourInternet now!

It’s funny how y'all will reblog any and all US things but when whole Europe might lose access to internet then everything is quiet.

Are you fucking serious? Is this really happening? I’m European and I didn’t know a single thing about this

Here you have

https://eur-lex.europa.eu/legal-content/EN/TXT/?uri=CELEX:52016PC0593

https://creativecommons.org/2018/06/20/european-parliaments-legal-affairs-committee-gives-green-light-to-harmful-link-tax-and-pervasive-platform-censorship/?utm_source=social&utm_medium=twitterfacebook&utm_content=JURI-vote-june-20

https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/article-13-european-parliament-internet-censorship-copyright-a8408531.html?amp&__twitter_impression=true

https://amp.theguardian.com/technology/2018/jun/20/eu-votes-for-copyright-law-that-would-make-internet-a-tool-for-control?__twitter_impression=true

http://www.wired.co.uk/article/eu-meme-war-article-13-regulation

Also ao3 has spoken out about this

https://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/10637

PLEASE help share this as someone who lives in Europe I don’t want to see the internet change forever

The customer is never right

normalize the customer never being right

Nah. I had to spend ten minutes convincing a Starbucks barista that their Eggnog Chai doesn’t have coffee in it. It’s a tea, for goodness sakes.

She never believed me, but she did make me a “special” one with milk instead of espresso. *facepalm*

You mean the eggnog chai LATTE you fucking idiot? Die

The customer is always wrong and I can’t believe some poor barista had to deal with this foolishness on Black Friday none the less

… I feel like this is kinda mean. Labeling EVERYONE in a certain category (the customers) as wrong simply isn’t true. There are definitely customers who are mistaken in certain situations but just because that’s true, it doesn’t make everyone else wrong. That’s like saying ALL men are stronger than women, which isn’t true. SOME men are stronger and SOME women are stronger. We as people should start using SOME more than ALL and NEVER.

You can really tell who’s never worked in retail before by the way they view customers

It's called a latte because it's milk in it. Latte is italian for milk, are you serious rn? Chai = tea, latte = milk. It is literally tea with milk?

There is no fucking coffee in a chai latte, jfc.