I wanted to do a quick overview of the Oxford High school shooting case in Michigan and why the parents being charged is monumental.
First, I’m glad that it is showing it can be done and should be done but I also want people to know this was a very unique case. I’m not sure what has been shown or written about at the national or international level at all in terms of detail within the media so I wanted to take a moment to do that here from someone who lives not too far from that area and is part of the local news circuit. It’s a spark note version but I’ll do my best.
Ethan Crumbley was the shooter in the case. What happened was awful and tragic and it should never have gotten to this point. However, he has completely owned up to his part and plead guilty immediately. I know this might not be what everyone feels or should feel/think, but personally I feel sorry for the kid. You see, he was a good kid. I know every news story starts that way and it sounds cliche but he truly was. He had friends, he did well in school and cared about his community at one point. He was the head of a backpack school drive he started on his own one year collecting supplies for underprivileged students. Doesn’t sound like a shooter right? About 3 years before, he started experiencing mental health issues. His half brother lived with them at the time and even noted there was a sudden change in him. Behavioral issues, emotional issues and mood swings that seemed to come out of no where. It wasn’t like him at all and the brother brought it up to the dad out of concern. The dad told him to mind his damn business. Dad of the year award!
Idk the specifics but the step mom was not liked and a real bitch. I think everyone could see this during the trial itself. Whatever happened, the half brother ended up moving to Florida to live with his mom permanently. He felt guilty leaving his brother behind alone in the house with them. When the brother left, Ethan no longer had an advocate or someone looking out for him. For a year before this shooting, he begged his parents for help saying he didn’t feel like himself and was having dark thoughts. Instead of helping their son, they instead bought him a gun for his birthday thinking he could just get rid of his problems that way. One of the main evidence items for both parent’s trials was Ethan’s diary. It’s heartbreaking hearing and seeing what this teenager was going through and not being able to figure it out. He talked about hearing voices constantly. While I’m not sure if he’s been publicly diagnosed with anything, I think it’s a fun fact to know and point out that schizophrenia usually does not become apparent or diagnosed until the later teen years or early adulthood. When it does come, it happens overnight and is an upheaval to one’s life and their family. But with the right help and treatment early on, an individual with this disorder or any mental health disorder can live a very successful, rather normal life.
Unfortunately Ethan did not have the support or help he desperately needed. Now maybe he should have went to a school counselor….but honestly what teen willingly opens up to strangers when they don’t even know what’s going on in their own head. Teens are still kids and developing and learning. I know when I was a teen suffering from major depressive disorder, I didn’t know how to handle my own strong emotions or feelings let alone explain it to someone else. The moment you are rejected by a parent, the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally, you reject help from any other outside source & feel you must journey it alone because if your own parent doesn’t care, who will? The other thing that is a big mystery is why the school counselor never got involved by the school themselves. It was noted by teachers his mood swings and they found disturbing doodles in his folders, notebooks and notes. This is what lead to the parents being called in that fateful day anyway. At this point, a school counselor should have been brought in before this meeting to see what was going on in case child protective services needed to be called and intervene. The parents meant with (I believe) the principal and the teacher that discovered the doodles. They advised on therapy/counseling and to take him home for at least the day. The parents refused saying he could stay and finish the day and they had stuff to do. Per Michigan law, a school cannot dismiss a child without a parent present. Once the parents refused to take him, they had to keep him in school by law (this is a whole new lawsuit being hurled at the school currently). So they left Ethan at school and hours later, he pulled the handgun out of his backpack….the same backpack that had been sitting with them all in that office talking that morning…and killed 4 students and injured multiple others.
The mom had been having an affair and that is why she would not take him home as she was off sneaking with her secret boyfriend that morning. The boyfriend ended up testifying in court against her. See, the case is unique as when Ethan was arrested and brought in for questioning, the first thing he begged for was help. You can pretty much tell when someone is lying or faking the insanity card but in this case, it was very very genuine. He spilled the beans pretty hard on his family life straight away and that he begged for them to help him. As the investigation dug into the family over the next couple days, they did in fact find records and signs that yes, this was indeed a case of child neglect and a case of mental health gone wrong.
THAT is solely the reason the parents were immediately issued warrants for their arrest to be prosecuted along with their son. They knew it was a possibility and tried to run. They were found in an abandoned building in Detroit hiding which is about 30 minutes away from the Oxford area.
One of the things that I thought was moving was that when the families were able to make their victim impact speeches, they never once put blame on Ethan. Like I said, that diary that he kept for years was fool proof evidence of what was happening in that house and what that kid lived through causing him to snap. All of this along with text messages that were retrieved and family/classmate testimonies. He was asked to come in and testify on each parent’s behalf during their separate trials and Ethan refused each time. The kid wants absolutely nothing to do with his parents. It wasn’t right what he did by any means and he’s serving life for it as he should, but I did love that each family put the sole blame on the parents. One mom saying that they loved their daughter but it was extremely clear that the Crumbley’s did not love their son.
If more cases like this happen in the future, which I pray to God it does not, it does set a precedent for future mental health scenarios. While there is room to prosecute a parent for failure to lock up fire arms or even gifting them a firearm, I don’t see another case quite like this one happening again where it came down to neglect all around. The parents cannot speak to each other in any form and are not allowed to contact their son or the victim’s families. When I tell you these are the pure evil and horseshit of human beings, I truly mean it.
I also think it needs to open the door to more open conversations around mental health and stricter gun reform. While we’ve come a long way as far as the stigma goes, we have so much further to go. Mental healthcare is still a luxury by today’s standards. Not every insurance company (if you’re lucky to even have insurance) covers therapy or counseling. Many sessions are extremely expensive nonetheless any medications one may have to be on for help. To me, if we can treat someone’s heart or lungs or even a broken bone, we should be able to also treat our most precious organ - the brain. After all, in order to be considered legally dead, one must be deemed brain dead. Mental health disorders are simply neurons and chemical reactions misfiring in the brain which can be caused by genetics or environmental (head injury, poor nutrition, or toxins) factors or both within the amygdala. The science proves it’s real and can be treated so why is it still such a fight and a taboo topic? Let’s end the stigma and help those who really need it!!
If you notice someone struggling, please help them even if it’s lending a listening ear. And if you’re struggling with thoughts of depression or dark thoughts that may harm others, please seek professional help or call 911 or 988. You can even text 988 or chat with someone online who will help you during a crisis.