star trekarama 

I was out with a friend tonight doing one of my fave things. Reading the backs of romance novels aloud. Found this gem.

This is honestly the most wild sounding romance novel I have ever seen and thought it might brighten someone’s day.

OK FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON’T REALIZE, SANDRA HILL IS THE WOMAN WHO WROTE “ROUGH AMD READY” ANOTHER EROTIC VIKING NOVEL. SOME OF THE MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES BEING:

“As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.”

“Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.”

“Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.”

YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I HAVE READ THIS TO AT COLLEGE. ONE GUY COMPLETELY LOST IT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER HEARING THE PHRASE “DICK ANEURYSM.”

@trash-fragments @olliecatsupernova

If I have to see this you do too

When you don’t turn up for your physical and hear the turbolift doors open

wlw fashion stereotypes exist so we can recognize each other in the wild

when i say the wild, i’m talking about straight people

Perks of dating me: we can nap constantly

i listened to green day once and now i’m gay and hate the government

i thought “tri-state area” was a phineas and ferb thing

I don't know what I was expecting when I pressed play, but it sure as fuck wasn't this.

This Man Did Something That’s Already Expected Of Women But He Gets Extra Praise Cause He’s A Man

No. A lot of women don’t go to cosmetology classes to learn how to do hair, they have the experience from growing up-their mom doing their hair, Then experimenting which what they can do themselves. This guy probably had short hair his entire life with no clue on what to do. He didn’t just look up how to do a ponytail, he paid for actual classes so that he could do his little daughters hair in cool and creative ways so that SHE gets the learning experience and learns how to do it her own and then can go to school with fabulous. This is A+ daddy right here, he went above and beyond because he knows that he lack in certain areas where a mom would pick this up. Please don’t destroy nice things that men do simply because they are men and you want to hate them.

Please don’t destroy nice things that men do simply because they are men and you want to hate them.

Shots fired.

Me: It’s not like I’m obsessed with Star Trek or anything.

[Narrator voice]: She was, in fact, obsessed. 

wish i was snuggling not struggling