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no idea what im doing with my life.

@miyomika

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ziggyplayedd

things that made me stop wanting to die that require no effort whatsoever

  • change the color used to highlight text on your laptop
  • move the pictures on your wall
  • stack whatever clutter is in your room into piles even if you don’t have time to clean it all
  • slightly vary your commute, even just by one street
  • change where you sit and scroll aimlessly on your phone even if it’s only to the chair in your room instead of your bed
  • drink water or juice out of a wine glass in the morning because nothing is real
  • shower with the lights off, without music
  • buy $3 flowers at trader joe’s—they look bad next to the more expensive ones but they look so good in your room
  • start typing things you don’t post into your notes. your thoughts can be worth documenting even if you don’t deem them worth sharing
  • wake up super early just once. you don’t have to make it a habit it’s just extra satisfying to go to bed that night
  • listen to the entirety of your favorite album from 2015

Almost all of these are about variety. Humans need stimulation! We need enrichment! We literally cannot do the same thing every day!

The other day I was feeling miserable, so I hopped on a bus and rode it all the way back to where I’d started, and my brain, which had finally had some proper stimulation via new environments, was suddenly ready to go again!

This is why taking walks/drives and trying new hobbies are good for you! Don’t turn yourself into a sad zoo animal! You need some pumpkins to roll around in your enclosure!

ITS BACK!!!!!

god i fucking love the quote “dont turn yourself into a sad zoo animal” it has really inspired me!

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recomvery

Not every day has to count. Some days are for repairing, resting, mourning. You don't have to perform every day. Some days are for doing nothing. For sleeping all day or being on your phone. Relaxing is ok, allowed and encouraged. Do what you need to do.

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reblogged

Peace be upon the daughter who helped her parents grow up. Accepted their cold shoulder, excused their anger, pardoned their mistakes, taught them how to be human. Peace be upon the sister who paid the price of rebellion. Screaming to her fullest, shaking like a leaf but standing tall, never letting the dictatorship go without a fight, paving the path for her siblings to breathe easier. Peace be upon the first child of an immigrant father. Aching to find their own purpose in life, firm in their own beliefs, contradicting generations and generations of cultural values. Peace be upon the girl who shouldered her mother's trauma. Swindled it into her own, morphed herself into an image of the womb she once resided in, immersed herself into troubles that weren't even hers, covered up scars that she couldn't even recognize. Peace be upon the woman who forgot who she was. So determined to be the savior of everyone, to fix her family, to nurture and love everyone around her. So deeply lost that she forgot she's just as worthy of love. Peace be upon you.

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