The Biggest Slut At The Antique Store

shirt idea

what if tumblr took a leaf out of youtubes book and sent people golden shoelaces after hitting a milestone. they don’t tell you what the milestone is

the absolute horror of staff reaching out to me through DMs going “what’s your address” with no further context. incredible. do it

Lmao

Happy Holidays from the Holiday Boar

Christmas/Holiday Boars have always been a thing but it still blows my mind that people choose my Holiday Boar to celebrate. Thank you for all the love, Stay safe and Happy Holidays!

YOU CAN STRIKE OUT EMOJIS???

CANCELED HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

Nooo don't cancel him, by sucking blood he can literally take nutrients from megafauna and move them back down the food chain without the megafauna having to die, and his larvae are able to breathe air so they can survive in extremely oxygen deprived water and kickstart ecosystems in decimated environments. I know he's annoying but he's literally so important😭😭😭

There are afab mosquitos using he/him pronouns now?

Mosquitoes can use whatever pronouns they want, hope this helps<3

don't MAKE me turn this hero's journey around!

Aww, is somebody still in “refusal of the call”?

#lmao how are you gonna turn around when the hero can never truly return home?

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

I am in love with you /p

Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

adding the Doctors Without Borders one

I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!

24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD

cannot get over this comment on a chess tournament video

(◡‿◡✿)

(ʘ‿ʘ✿) “what you say ‘bout me”

(ʘ‿ʘ)ノ✿ “hold my flower”

✿＼(｡-_-｡) “Kick his ass, baby.  I got yo flower.”

i found it

the original post

i found it

this should have the opportunity to be on everyone’s blog. 

*tour guide voice*

and here on the left ladies and gentlemen, you see one of the posts before everyone went batshit crazy

World Heritage Post

Everyone here is dead.

why is google docs correcting my fucking DNA sequence

Putting powdered sugar on the post below