@prokopetz / prokopetz.tumblr.com
Pinned
Finally creating a pinned post of my games. I’ve included all titles I’ve been involved with in some capacity, not just ones where I’m the author; when I’m not the author, I’ll note my role in (parentheses).
This post will be updated over time to reflect changes in the status of these projects, so if you’re looking at a reblog, feel free to click through to the original and see if it differs.
Last updated: 2024-01-28
A game I backed on Kickstarter just released the uncompressed print masters to backers alongside the web-ready ebook version, and while I appreciate the thoroughness and transparency, I strongly suspect the number of people in the backer pool who can conveniently peruse a 2.6 gigabyte PDF file is fairly small.
The fun thing about following speedrun progression for obscure precision platformers is that nearly without fail there's some random Youtuber out there whose PB is a full minute faster than what speedrun.com claims is the world record, but refuses to submit it to the leaderboard because she believes it's not a competition.
And the only people who watch her videos or know about her are her 10 dedicated subscribers and about a dozen random people who got one of her <100 view videos randomly recommended on YouTube.
This feels like a pertinent time to remind folks that I am also on Bluesky.
(Alternatively, if you're just here for updates on my tabletop RPG projects and don't care about the shitposting, following Penguin King Games on itch.io may be more the ticket!)
Also, if anybody I'm mutuals with here has a different name over there, please shoot me a DM via Tumblr so I know it's you!
I enjoy how we talk about ill-conceived cross promotions in major video game franchises like they're wacky hypothetical scenarios as though the original PS1 release of Parasite Eve II didn't have you restoring magic points by drinking Coca Cola way back in 1999.
If you aren't already familiar with it you will be very surprised to learn what this game is a paid advertisement for.
A 300-page script, by lead writer and designer Andy Wolfendon, was written and submitted to Mars, which only asked to change a joke, utterances of "damn" and "remove all the snakes from the game." When Braswell asked for clarification, they said that there could be snake-like creatures, but no actual snakes.
...
What?
My go-to ill-conceived-product-placement is the Energizer batteries in the original Alan Wake. To this day, I’m amazed that anyone thought “this game where a flashlight lasts approximately 2 minutes with a fresh set of batteries would be a perfect place for our batteries to be, in fact, the only batteries”
One of the more baffling examples I know of is Fallout Brotherhood of Steel. The series classic soft drink Nuka Cola is here replaced by a product placement for the real life soft drink Bawls.
It is worth noting that interplay wasn't in a particularly good place, creatively nor financially at the time.
what the fuck are these donations man
WELL THIS JUST POSES MORE QUESTIONS
The really funny part is "I Can Eat Glass" this isn't even the only popular 1990s Internet meme that involved collecting translations of a specific, slightly incongruous phrase. "Oh my God! There's an axe in my head." is another prominent example, just off the top of my head.
I enjoy how we talk about ill-conceived cross promotions in major video game franchises like they're wacky hypothetical scenarios as though the original PS1 release of Parasite Eve II didn't have you restoring magic points by drinking Coca Cola way back in 1999.
If you aren't already familiar with it you will be very surprised to learn what this game is a paid advertisement for.
A 300-page script, by lead writer and designer Andy Wolfendon, was written and submitted to Mars, which only asked to change a joke, utterances of "damn" and "remove all the snakes from the game." When Braswell asked for clarification, they said that there could be snake-like creatures, but no actual snakes.
...
What?
My go-to ill-conceived-product-placement is the Energizer batteries in the original Alan Wake. To this day, I’m amazed that anyone thought “this game where a flashlight lasts approximately 2 minutes with a fresh set of batteries would be a perfect place for our batteries to be, in fact, the only batteries”
The fun thing about following speedrun progression for obscure precision platformers is that nearly without fail there's some random Youtuber out there whose PB is a full minute faster than what speedrun.com claims is the world record, but refuses to submit it to the leaderboard because she believes it's not a competition.
What I love about Bat to the Heavens is that its basic premise is literally the kind of daft shit you'd see proposed in one of those "game ideas that would never work in practice" pieces. "Level-based precision platformer where all of the levels are actually part of a contiguous open world with no screen transitions or loading zones, separated from each other by high walls and deep chasms, so with the right speed tech you can skip levels or do them out of order" like, what the fuck are you talking about? And then it actually makes it work, and the resulting speedrun route needs to be seen to be believed.
So they're like a found family, except explicitly modelled after the American nuclear family, like that one's like the mom, and that one's like the dad, and those two are like siblings. What? No, they're definitely fucking. Yeah, they refer to each other as siblings while they're doing it.
Them: This group of characters is a Found Family™, which is exactly like a related-by-blood family, so only the one I've decided is the Mom and the one I've decided is the Dad are allowed to fuck, and shipping any other pairing is literally promoting incest.
Me: That's kind of hot.
Them:
I enjoy how we talk about ill-conceived cross promotions in major video game franchises like they're wacky hypothetical scenarios as though the original PS1 release of Parasite Eve II didn't have you restoring magic points by drinking Coca Cola way back in 1999.
If you aren't already familiar with it you will be very surprised to learn what this game is a paid advertisement for.
A 300-page script, by lead writer and designer Andy Wolfendon, was written and submitted to Mars, which only asked to change a joke, utterances of "damn" and "remove all the snakes from the game." When Braswell asked for clarification, they said that there could be snake-like creatures, but no actual snakes.
...
What?
I swear the human pain response is so fucking maladaptive. "Oh, yeah, being in pain for an extended period of time can provoke a system-wide inflammation response which both slows healing and causes additional pain in parts of the body unrelated to the original injury, so taking painkillers may actually make you heal faster" who designed this bullshit?
I enjoy how we talk about ill-conceived cross promotions in major video game franchises like they're wacky hypothetical scenarios as though the original PS1 release of Parasite Eve II didn't have you restoring magic points by drinking Coca Cola way back in 1999.
If you aren't already familiar with it you will be very surprised to learn what this game is a paid advertisement for.
