booty shorts that say rhys your vibes are rancid on the ass 

is it even ethical to flavor blast a goldfish

NICE ONE, BABE! | Guns, Love and Tentacles (March 26th 2020)

Me and my brother in our bl3 playthrough..!!!! He was gaige and i was krieg of course .🧛‍♂️

Borderlands RP masterlist!

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Oh, he missed this. A casual prodding joke all in the heart of playing around was something he had missed doing. It was definitely a separation from the constant screaming about meat and various fluids. For once, he could be sane for long enough; up to a day at the minimum now. He could mess around for a little bit from time to time, anyway.

Though, if there was one thing he could admit, seeing Gaige this way almost brought out a stifle of laughter from the old hunter.

"Fortunately for you, I'm not the other big guy," he chuckled. "And I can say it to your face... like so..."

Slowly, he brought himself to a squat, resting his arms against his knees with his rifle held in one hand, buzz-axe on his shoulders. He had his preferences of weaponry, of course, "...and it only proves my point. The blood kind of adds to it. Not saying you aren't capable, but to me... you're pretty intimidating like a butterfly."

"-- good. Because I am capable." Her organic hand is resting on her hip and her prosthetic is pointed accusingly right at his face, Deathtrap whirring threateningly behind her. ( As threateningly as a being who'd never lay a claw on anyone in their merry little band could whirr, anyway. )

She takes a beat to wonder if she'd ever get this far into the other big guy's face. Maybe. The other big guy would never goad her, though. "If I wanted to, I could kick your ass!" No shot. None whatsoever. "A hammer might not beat out a buzzsaw, but I've got a full magazine and a flying, electric bodyguard. I'm basically unstoppable! You're lucky I'm nice. Or I'd do it. I'd kick your ass."

𝟐𝟎𝟎 𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 

❛ close your eyes and hold out your hands. ❜ ❛ what are you smiling at? ❜ ❛ i can’t leave you alone for one minute, can i? ❜ ❛ was it you? did you do all this? ❜ ❛ i don’t know how you do this every day… ❜ ❛ that is not an appropriate question to ask a lady you’ve just met. ❜ ❛ i’m not sorry. ❜ ❛ i did warn you not to trust me. ❜ ❛ do you remember anything? at all? ❜ ❛ you’re lucky you’re cute. ❜ ❛ why don’t you just kill me? ❜ ❛ did you hurt yourself? ❜ ❛ i could show you the way. ❜ ❛ i don’t feel so good. ❜ ❛ you owe me a dinner. a very nice dinner. ❜ ❛ don’t go. please. ❜ ❛ you wanna know what your problem is? ❜ ❛ i’m here to drink alone. ❜ ❛ don’t run away from this. ❜ ❛ i’m just saying, murder is an option. ❜ ❛ i didn’t realize you were in so much pain. ❜ ❛ i guess it runs in the family, huh? ❜ ❛ you wouldn’t understand. ❜ ❛ we’ve been through a lot. i think we should just lay low and take it easy. ❜ ❛ dangerous to be out so late. ❜ ❛ i hope you haven’t been standing out in the cold this whole time. ❜ ❛ i made a mistake. ❜ ❛ am i not good enough? ❜ ❛ i’m going to get you out of here. ❜ ❛ why did you bring me here? ❜ ❛ aren’t we in a good mood today? ❜ ❛ don’t shut me out. please. ❜ ❛ the storm’s getting worse. ❜ ❛ i never meant to hurt you. ❜ ❛ you’re about as intimidating as a butterfly. ❜ ❛ have you come to laugh at me in my miserable state? ❜ ❛ here, take this. you’ll catch a cold. ❜ ❛ this is the part where you leave. ❜ ❛ why are you talking like we’ll never see each other again? ❜ ❛ you stepped on my foot! ❜ ❛ you’re not a very convincing liar. ❜ ❛ we’re in completely different leagues. ❜ ❛ how did you find me? ❜ ❛ i don’t need you anymore. ❜ ❛ rough day today? ❜ ❛ snap out of it! ❜ ❛ you look better in my clothes than i do. ❜ ❛ why are you still here? ❜ ❛ can i ask… what happened? ❜ ❛ are you saying you care about me? ❜ ❛ i won’t let anyone hurt you. ❜ ❛ it’s not stealing if it was mine to begin with. ❜ ❛ well, this is where i live. ❜ ❛ we’re not so different after all. ❜ ❛ how long have i been asleep? ❜ ❛ no more lies, no more secrets. ❜ ❛ can you forgive me? ❜ ❛ i thought you… i saw you get shot. ❜ ❛ why are you really here? ❜ ❛ i wish we never met. ❜ ❛ you look like you need a hug. ❜ ❛ would you run away with me? ❜ ❛ see? i’m not just a pretty face. ❜ ❛ we can stop them. i can help you. ❜ ❛ what now? i’m tired. ❜ ❛ i didn’t want you to see me like this. ❜ ❛ i can’t do this without you. ❜ ❛ if you tell me yours, i’ll tell you mine. ❜ ❛ are you threatening me? ❜ ❛ did you ever care about me? ❜ ❛ treat me like the princess that i am! ❜ ❛ i’m not leaving you. ❜ ❛ why did you come? ❜ ❛ i need your help… and you need mine. ❜ ❛ i wish i could hate you. ❜ ❛ i see you don’t recognize me. well, it was a long time ago. ❜ ❛ you’ve lost a lot of blood. ❜ ❛ i had my suspicions, but until now i wasn’t sure. ❜ ❛ there’s nothing left for me here. ❜ ❛ that is… literally illegal. you’re describing something illegal. ❜ ❛ wait. i’ve heard that sound before. ❜ ❛ just try to hang on. ❜ ❛ so why’s it so important anyway? ❜ ❛ i’ll stay in tonight, thanks. ❜ ❛ we can’t keep going on like this. ❜ ❛ in about a minute, you’ll be sorry you didn’t listen to me. ❜ ❛ is this seat taken? sorry, it’s a bit crowded here. ❜ ❛ you can’t leave me here alone! ❜ ❛ i’ll believe it when i see it. ❜ ❛ why are you laughing? this is a very serious situation. ❜ ❛ i bought two. here. ❜ ❛ i’ve seen you before, walking by. ❜ ❛ why can’t i come with you? ❜ ❛ c'mon. aren’t you worried what might happen if we go? ❜ ❛ walk with me? ❜ ❛ it’s very rude to stare. ❜ ❛ how many times have i told you? you can’t visit me here. ❜ ❛ we can’t fix this. can we? ❜ ❛ are you going to kill me? ❜ ❛ it’s not like you can stop me. ❜ ❛ it’s not safe for people to see us together. ❜ ❛ take me with you. ❜ ❛ some risks are worth taking. ❜ ❛ let them go. take me instead. ❜ ❛ what do you want in exchange for it? ❜ ❛ is being drunk an excuse? ❜ ❛ promise me you won’t overreact. ❜ ❛ how can i possibly trust you? after all you’ve done. ❜ ❛ how long have you been standing there? ❜ ❛ why did you wake me? ❜ ❛ i’m not here to talk about my feelings. ❜ ❛ you were going to leave without saying goodbye? ❜ ❛ for some reason, i’m attracted to you. ❜ ❛ promise me? ❜ ❛ it’s nothing, i’m just tired. ❜ ❛ i feel safe with you. ❜ ❛ i don’t need your help. ❜ ❛ i think i have a bit more experience with this thing than you do. ❜ ❛ no way, i’m not doing that. ❜ ❛ i do care. ❜ ❛ you snore in your sleep. it’s adorable. ❜ ❛ i have a spare bed. ❜ ❛ you’re very kind. some day it’ll get you killed. ❜ ❛ you’ll always have a home with me. ❜ ❛ of course i care. you’re my family. ❜ ❛ you shouldn’t insult people that are bigger than you. ❜ ❛ i never wanted to hurt you. ❜ ❛ i swear it wasn’t me. ❜ ❛ we can just sit here, you don’t have to talk. ❜ ❛ did you miss me? ❜ ❛ this isn’t just about you. it’s about what’s best for all of us. ❜ ❛ you can never admit when you’re wrong! ❜ ❛ is this what you wanted? ❜ ❛ what are you doing out here by yourself? ❜ ❛ sorry to put you through that. i guess i owe you one now. ❜ ❛ the only time you talk to me is when you need something. ❜ ❛ i’m still learning. ❜ ❛ if you have something to say, spit it out. ❜ ❛ you… don’t like me very much, do you? ❜ ❛ i’m on your side. ❜ ❛ i risked my life for you! ❜ ❛ whatever you’re going to ask, the answer is no. ❜ ❛ you can stay with me. ❜ ❛ i just need time. ❜ ❛ please don’t do this, don’t act like you care. ❜ ❛ who the hell invited you? ❜ ❛ what? no witty remark? nothing clever to say? ❜ ❛ i just wanted to say i’m sorry. ❜ ❛ think of it as a compliment. ❜ ❛ do you ever stop being so serious and dull? ❜ ❛ it’s rare to see your kind around here. ❜ ❛ you remember me. that’s good. ❜ ❛ you’re a terrible flirt you know. ❜ ❛ are you kidding me? we’re not ‘fine’! ❜ ❛ right now i wish i was dead. ❜ ❛ i guess i should’ve told you. ❜ ❛ you’re not alone. i’m here. ❜ ❛ you’ve been so quiet. what’s on your mind? ❜ ❛ knowledge is power. ❜ ❛ you scared me. ❜ ❛ well, what’s so strange about that? ❜ ❛ don’t look at me like that. ❜ ❛ i want to be there when you get what’s coming to you. ❜ ❛ just who do you think you are? ❜ ❛ you look… amazing. ❜ ❛ we’re safe, aren’t we? ❜ ❛ you know, i really hoped i’d never see this place again. ❜ ❛ don’t touch me. get away from me. ❜ ❛ i thought you’d like this. ❜ ❛ it’s too dark, i can’t see anything. ❜ ❛ what’s that smug look for? you think you can do any better? ❜ ❛ who did you piss off this time? ❜ ❛ you should’ve thought about that before you got into a fight. ❜ ❛ i only wanted to help. ❜ ❛ you knew and you didn’t tell me? ❜ ❛ you don’t scare me. ❜ ❛ wow, look who remembered my existence. ❜ ❛ change isn’t easy. ❜ ❛ why did you help me? ❜ ❛ why do you hate me? ❜ ❛ i can’t even trust myself anymore. ❜ ❛ i was making sure you weren’t dead, since you never called. ❜ ❛ you look awful. what happened? ❜ ❛ are you here to kill me? ❜ ❛ you know you aren’t allowed in here, right? ❜ ❛ was that a friend of yours? ❜ ❛ two years later and you haven’t changed. ❜ ❛ you look like you just saw a ghost. ❜ ❛ nobody tells me what to do. ❜ ❛ you’re too scared to do it, aren’t you? ❜ ❛ come on. it can’t be that bad. ❜ ❛ i hope to repay your kindness someday. ❜ ❛ just let me do this for you. ❜ ❛ why were they coming after you? ❜ ❛ how many people have you killed? how many? ❜ ❛ how much do you value your life? ❜ ❛ you don’t know when to give up, do you? ❜ ❛ don’t lie to me. ❜ ❛ i’m not sober enough to talk about this. ❜ ❛ have a drink with me. ❜