enemies (romantically)

There are 364 days till Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up.

Unbelievable.

I WAITED A WHOLE YEAR TO REBLOG THIS

AN ENTIRE YEAR

(source)

Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious

Scary, scary.

Gonna add on to this: From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:

Tips for getting drinks-

1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser.

2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.

3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:

Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:

X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.

Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.

Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.

Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%

Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.

Hope this helps someone out!

Backing this up from years of bar tending.

Adding to this:

When I was a fresh bartender, I had a couple sitting in the corner, already drinking when I started my shift. They seemed like they knew each other really well considering how much they had their hands on one another. But I still came by and asked if they were okay. The man just waved me off while the woman said, “I need some water.”

The man laughed it off and told me, “She doesn’t need any water. She’s fine.”

She was not fine. Clearly. I decided I was going to cut the two off anyway and bring them some water. As I was filling up the glasses, I heard the woman say, “Stop. I said no. I don’t feel good.”

Her tone and attitude changed instantly. She kept pushing his hand away when he reached for her face, turned her head away when he tried to kiss her. Loudly told him, “Stop. I’m done for tonight.”

So I made sure to refill her water the moment she finished it, and I stayed within earshot of them the whole night. And every time I did, the man got mad at me, told me to leave them alone. Their friends were there, surrounding them and told me that those two always fought when they were drunk and apologized, so I relaxed a little. But the last time I refilled her drink, I heard a loud crash.

She fell out of her stool and hit her head on the floor. And he calmly drank his drink. Their friends didn’t even blink. I jumped over the bar to tend to her and he just said, “Don’t worry, I’ll take her home. She always ends up like this. She drinks too much.”

But it didn’t sound right.

Then the woman began convulsing.

I yelled for the other bartender to call 911 and when I did, the guy suddenly disappeared. I tried asking thr friends questions about him and they just blew it off as the woman being a black our drunk. And one of them said, “We’ll get her home. Don’t worry.”

But when thr EMTs showed up with the police, they all disappeared too.

A few days later the woman came with an attorney. She asked me and the other bartender who worked before me some questions. Turns out, she didn’t know any of those people. They weren’t her friends or her boyfriend. They had met that night, when the guy asked her if he could buy her a drink. At the hospital, they found traces of Rohypnol in her system.

The guy had Roofied her. And his friends were in on it.

The security camera footage showed he had put something in her drink when she left for the bathroom before my shift.

So seriously, it happens. You have to be careful with your drinks! Always watch it, don’t let anyone handle it, and take it with you wherever you go–even the bathroom. Or if you’re a regular at that bar, ask the bartender to put it behind the bar. We’ll do it.

Rb for that last add, don’t ever worry about being polite! Protect urself!

REBLOG AND SPREAD THE WORD!

I don’t drink(bec ya know I’m a child) but for those of you that do pls be careful

bringing back this video of chris evans and anthony mackie singing feliz navidad to get you into the christmas spirit ✨

Happy first birthday Knife-Wielding Tentacle..👍

dear god, it lives still

Save the date folks, Knife-Wielding Tentacle’s second birthday is November 16th.

HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY, KNIFE-WIELDING TENTACLE!

Of course he’s a Scorpio

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

knife-wielding tentacle is 5 years old today…………………

They grow up so fast. :’)

i’m so done with the way girls in twenties are treated. i’m so done with people who literally create timetable for us. 20- 24  find a guy, 24-26 make him propose to you, 27-29 get married. i’m so done. i’m do not want to get 2 a.m texts from my best friend who is freaking out that she is gonna die alone. i do not want see my 20 years old friend wasting her time on some guys who are not even interested in her. i do not want see us falling for every nice guy who does not look creepy. i do not want to see girls get sad or paranoid just bcos they do not fill in the schedule. you are ok. you should enjoy your life at its fullest and one day you will find 10/10 so do not pursue 6 just because you do not want to be single. it is ok and one day you will find someone. do not split your love with people who does not deserve it. keep it for yourself and when time will come you will know. i know it hurts. i know you wish u could just open part of yourself and release the buzzing love. but not every kind of love is romantic. show it to your family, friends, plants, yourself.

Not a real criticism, just an expansion really, but …  it’s not just the timetables we need to get away from, but the goal itself, I think.  “One day you will find someone,” sounds comforting, but the reason it doesn’t lay fears to rest is because we are all smart enough to know it’s not necessarily true.

My aunt is over sixty, never married, and never, so far as I am aware, ever even had a great romance.  She dated a lot, but never clicked and now seems to have given up.  My mentor is over seventy, divorced her asshole husband more than half her life ago and has never found anyone since.

We all know women (and men) like these.  And because we know them, we know that “one day you will find someone,” is just … hogwash.  Because sometimes you just … don’t.  Or sometimes you do, but he turns out to be a cad.  Or you do and the universe rips you apart in the most unfair way possible.  And because society has us so fixated on finding “our other half” or whatever, we view these women as cautionary tales.

But … 

My aunt trains dogs.  Her schipperke is the national champion for his breed.  She spent so much of her life as a librarian, nurturing the love of books in kids, myself among them.  I ride horses because of her, and it’s one of the very few things I do that makes my soul feel at peace.

My mentor is one of the best criminal defense attorneys in her state.  She has devoted her life to fighting to ensure that everyone gets a vigorous defense.  Because of her countless people have had the opportunity to turn their lives around.  Because of her, they’ve had a life to turn around.  Because of her, the prosecution and the police in her jurisdiction are forced to behave ethically and adhere to the rule of law.  She’s still, even now fighting to abolish the death penalty.  It’s because of her that I am pursuing the life I am.

These women’s lives are not nothing.  In fact they are a whole lot of something, and it makes my heart hurt that I ever, in my dark 3 am’s, thought of their lives as something to be avoided at all costs.

So love your family, your friends, your pets, your gardens.  Love your job or your hobby or your raison d’ etre, whatever it is.  Love sunsets and the smell of rain and yourself, and don’t love these as something to do as a placeholder until the buzzing, romantic love comes, but love these as things worth loving all in themselves.

It’s fucking hard some days.  The dark 3 am’s still come sometimes.  But most days, I am so much more at peace knowing that I am not incomplete or waiting, but that my life, if it ended today, is worth it because of the platonic, familial, friendship love I have shared.  And if the other kind does come someday, that’ll be nice, but it won’t make any of the others less.  It’ll just be caramel sauce on a sundae–tasty and wonderful, but the sundae was perfect without it too.

I needed this today.

(this thread)

Had a bit of a rant this morning. Gender is a construct and biology is a joke. Trans lives matter.

“You don’t care what my biology is or what gender I am. You care that I’m not performing femininity to your standards.” 

That’s a fantastic way of putting it. It reminds me of that 2016 news story from 2016 of a woman, assigned female at birth, who was forced out of a women’s restroom by 3 male cops. She didn’t present as feminine in her baggy Men’s section clothes, short hair, and backwards baseball cap and that was enough “proof” to call the cops and drag her off. 

This is why TERF ideology is so self-destructive. TERF’s claim they’re “pro-women, pro-female empowerment, pro-keeping women safe” but put into practice, it harms AFAB women as well as trans women.  When women are told “you should conform more to patriarchal beauty standards or you deserve harassment”, forced to present their ID (containing their home address) to “prove” their gender, when the women’s restroom fills with male cops to drag out someone for being suspiciously androgynous. 

That isn’t Feminist at all! It’s an anti-woman stance. 

Excluding Transgender Women from Female Empowerment is Counter-Intuitive to the Cause! Trans Women are Women! Policing Gender Expression is Regressive! 

Yeah. I listened to a self-identified Black butch lesbian talk about how a white woman called the police on her for being in the bathroom and the white male officer asked to feel her chest to “prove” she was a woman.

The Black butch - cis - lesbian was giving this talk at an anti-bathroom bill rally by the way. She was revealing this horrible story to the audience to make them understand what transphobia really is, and really does. And yes it is related to racism.

Seriously. FUCK. TERFS.

Tumblr Code.

This is an absolute tumblr relic. I feel like an archaeologist right now. This is incredible that this is on my dash.

Actually no this is the post of the decade

Reawakening this ancient beast of a post for the end of the decade lmao.

“Reblogering”

*le gasp* i found the anciet code

i got rainbow shoelaces once and my friend complimented them and i remembered the code and said it and she *gasped* so this actually works

noting this

your childhood is gay, and there’s nothing you can do about it!

or, a celebration of some children’s characters we love to relate to (even if it makes cishets mad). hope you all had a happy pride month 🌈

if you have an emotional support fanfic, do yourself a favour and click that download button at the top of the page. then you don’t have to worry about it being deleted

but everytime i come back i boost hits 👉👈

the download is your emergency backup! keep reading however you like to read in the meantime ❤

Pokeball Interior Posters made by Susan Lao

i don’t know who needs to hear this, but here it goes: you don’t have to repeatedly and harshly punish yourself for every little thing you think you do wrong. you don’t have to diminish or eliminate your worth and dignity in order to become a better person and acknowledge your mistakes. please forgive yourself, please keep going and please, be flawed! perfection is unattainable.

due to personal reasons im going to sleep