btw I will only resume gardenia posting if Oscar comes back to tumblr. which means you all need to unblock him and be nice to him. yes I know his blog sucks but deal with it

Do it then

This is why art is important, in case you were wondering.

And kids will be so productive if you make it a game. I bet at least 50% of the kids who met this sculpture went and intentionally hunted for litter to feed it.

The trick to having a lot of friends is to meet ppl and then keep bothering them to hang out

Not kidding, if you enjoy someone’s company ask them to go have coffee with you or something. It hurts nobody and you might gain a really cool friendship

Are you alright, honey? You've barely put your blorbo in situations

Okay but back when I could afford a therapy my psychiatrist asked if I had written any fanfiction or planned any out in my head, and I was "nah, not really." And she nodded and looked down at her notes and was like "so how do you feel about possibly trying Zoloft?"

I started laughing and she was like "I know it sounds funny but it's been six months without you engaging in your favorite hobby and that's a sign the depression is getting to a point where we might why try some treatments with meds in addition to therapy."

So like. yeah.

So, babe, ARE you okay? You've barely put your blorbo in situations

watched a tiktok where the girl was talking about how people give black cats credit for acting wayyyy cooler and smarter and more dignified than they really do

Woman: My boyfriend is such a golden retriever

Me (trying to be open minded but clearly disgusted): Oh cool. I didn't know certain laws had changed

Sometimes I get in a bad place and think that humans are intrinsically terrible but here's the thing: the floors in my apartment building are really thin. I can hear everything the guy in the unit above me does. Sometimes I hear him sneeze and I say "bless you" reflexively. And today I sneezed and heard him call out "bless you" to me.

Humans are good. We are good. At our core, we are silly and weird and good.

the other fun thing about Eurovision is the incentives mismatch between picking a performer capable of winning the national competition and picking a performer capable of winning the actual contest, which results in hilariously inappropriate and/or underpowered entries to make it through.

ad agency mood; exactly like having to get a creative concept approved by the client before it can make the cut to get into market research and prove it works for the actual target audience it’s intended for

those relatable ad agency moods hey

That post hadn’t been cleared for market research. How were they supposed to know if it was relatable or not?

College student in the west: I am immune to propaganda because I read the Hunger Games. I can see right through the American psyop and know the real truth about how Bin Laden was a queer environment activist who wanted to promote socialism and walkable cities,

Gardenia is at war…….. with Los Angeles

(we watched a fairy secret and had fun with it)

the land that used to be Los Angeles (now known as fairyland) is an enemy country formed by gardenian rebels and refugees. it’s existed for a while and has several generations of people who were just born there and has grown from a refugee camp into a country in its own right. like Gardenia it is ruled by people with magic but the culture is very different. the royal family doesn’t hoard magic there just kind of aren’t laws as to what you can do with it, which means it kind of sucks to live there if you don’t have magic (the queen of fairyland likes to torture nonmagic men for fun (I support her in this)). it’s literally magic LA which is as hedonistic and wild as it sounds BUT it’s also a military state. every citizen of fairyland has to do mandatory 15-20 years of military service. and it has completely closed borders no one gets in or out without military approval.

they aren’t actually fairies but some of the refugees they take in are the enchanted “fairy” slaves from Gardenia. that + all the magic led to Gardenia branding them fairies as a kind of slur and they just ran with it. the existence of fairyland is used as a way for Georgia/Laverna to keep citizens in line because we need more government control in order to fight Fairyland guys, this is to protect your freedom.

current queen of fairyland is a competent ruler and military general but also has several screws loose and also has bpd probably. her husband has no power but DOES have a very popular boy band that is banned in Gardenia. Gardenians still listen to it illegally though. Jenna is a fan.

a couple of characters we will work on later got banned from fairyland for being military deserters and are now trying to cozy up to tifania bc she’s dumb and has power that they’re trying to use to get personal revenge on the queen. probably they will meet up with the resistance at some point (we have some things? that we’re discussing re:resistance ft. the princess power girls but nothing solid enough to post yet).

speaking of princess power girls I forget if we posted this or not but the king and queen of that movie did some pretty horrifying experiments on random children in order to get the right formula to give magic to their daughter who we have named Caroline. the one girl who did not die (Raquel??? unnamed) they’re letting live in the palace as Caroline’s “cousin” and lady in waiting but make no mistake they tortured her in a lab for years first and she h a t e s them. anyway she and Caroline went to princess charm school together obviously. she and Gallagher became friends there bc she was the only one not in love with him (she’s gay). Tifania also went and bullied her a lot. she has held a grudge against tifania forever because of this and loves to fuck with her.

Gallagher’s entire magic power revolves around making people fall in love with him, he is the son of a powerful man who is scheming against the throne, and he has ties to the imperial royal family. all of this makes it a given that he gets stalked and kidnapped sometimes. he kind of takes it in stride at this point.

we also talked a little about how the magic works. there are different general types of magic you can get (glamour magic, emotional magic, elemental magic etc) and you’re born with one of those. and as a very young child you can do a little bit of whatever but your powers develop depending on how you end up using the magic most. Jenna has such powerful light powers because she’s an artist and was really into working with color. Taylor has fire powers because he is super autistic and had really scary meltdowns as a kid (oh yeah speaking of Taylor he is. probably a spy for the resistance).

TIFANIA AND GALLAGHER’S BIG ADVENTURE (not canon probably)

Gallagher gets kidnapped by the fairy queen. it’s originally for political reasons bc she wants to force preminger to work with her, but because of his powers she ends up falling in love with him. she makes him wear tiny sexy useless armor (even tinier and more useless bc he is fatter than he looks bc magic) and fight her husband in a duel (she forces her husband to fight duels all the time, it’s like foreplay for them). Gallagher is very polite and charming throughout all this bc seduction is his one weapon.

tifania and Raquel??? and Tifania’s military deserter sycophants invade fairyland to rescue him. most of a fairy secret is Tifania’s version of how that went down as she relates it to Gallagher afterwards (she is trying to get laid). she didn’t actually save the day that much but she sure made it sound like she did. they have winged horses bc she really!!! wanted there to be winged horses in fairyland so she lied to everyone that she saw them and no one else did bc they only show themselves to people who are pure of heart like her. Raquel then said she saw winged horses too and hers were better than Tifania’s and tifania couldn’t say shit about it. she also lied a LOT about how she and Raquel buried the hatchet and Raquel told her how pretty and perfect and awesome she is at every opportunity. they WERE actually friendly with each other but only because they ate fairy food (molly). Gallagher knows this is all bullshit but he goes along with it bc he also wants to get laid.

for his part he is totally able to hold his own but acts like an even more pathetic and useless ken when tifania shows up bc he wants her to baby him. she too knows he is bullshitting but goes along with it. this is a kind of weird foreplay for them. they have an actually cute relationship it’s going to suck when she breaks his heart.

that's cool! who's the dude just chilling there?

I’m guessing it’s the dude that got “passed over” considering he looks like a Generic Country Singer

Random country singer dude who had a hit covering her song maybe? Fast Car is not a 2023 song.

The guy is Luke Combs, who covered the song this year, and it went to #1 in the country charts

Tracy Chapman won the CMA for song of the year for it, because that award is for songwriters, and she wrote the song

@waknatious I'm tagging you since I'm adding extra info after you already saw it lol

I'm actually surprised that this cover was never discussed on Tumblr, tbh, because Luke Combs didn't change the words. He said he didn't want to make it his song... it was his favourite song as a kid, and he wanted to expose a new generation to it, but he also wanted them to know the original, so he left the lyrics the same.

So like... the #1 on country music stations featured a man singing the line "I work in the market as a checkout girl". Which like... you would never expect from country music.

But I think it was the right thing to do, because if he'd changed it, there probably would have been a lot of people who didn't realize it was a cover

it's a decent cover, too.

I like how there was a brief surge in thinkpieces over whether it was appropriate for him to cover it, and she immediately shut them down with "No, I like it and it's making me a ton of royalties, so go away".

My buddy lives in China so when the sun is setting for him, it’s rising for me. So, naturally, I sent him this