Daily Mirror, England, January 23, 1923 Image © The British Library Board. All Rights Reserved.
I forget who originally said it, but there’s a quote about “Great science fiction isn’t predicting the automobile, it’s predicting the traffic jam”
Social Security includes the number for a suicide hotline on the envelope they use to tell me they have decided to deny my disability
There’s a depressing ass poem hiding in here, but im too tired to put it together.
Characters being compared to dogs always use terriers or pitbulls or something for their metaphors. “They grab on and they don’t let go” “They keep worrying at it until it’s dead” etc.
Anyway, I want to see collies used as metaphors. Albert Payson Terhune style. “He was like an attack dog–making slash-and-run attacks, cutting them up worse every time, never staying in range long enough to get hurt but circling back over and over.”
@animatedamerican yes EXCELLENT.
“He was like a bloodhound–not actually that violent at all, but his reputation did the work for him.”
“He was like a corgi: by all signs unaware that a fight was even happening, just enthusiastic and delighted to be involved.”
“He was like a labrador– so known for being friendly and having a soft mouth that everyone forgot that he was actually quite large and had teeth.”
“He was like a poodle - much smarter than you’d expect for someone with such flamboyant hair ”
“He was like an Irish Wolfhound - he could do more damage being friendly than most people could do in a blind rage.”
He was like a beagle - AAAUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *breath* AUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
when i was in third grade we were made to give a report about one particular animal and since everyone else picked stuff like lions and elephants and other common stuff i decided to pick something more obscure and chose the capybara. all was well until i began presenting in front of the class and the teacher was pissed off and said "I told you to pick a REAL animal, not a made up one!" i suppose describing it as a labrador-sized guinea pig wasn't a good way to sway her
everytime I look back at the pre internet era and the American Public's general unawareness of animals outside of like the standard ones you see in your backyard, I take a deep breath and give a pair of thanks for Wikipedia
Know what? We all need some pure innocence combined with satisfying accomplishment.
did I ever tell yall I used to think charlie chaplin was a drag king. for like three years straight
we watched modern times in seventh grade n I saw this shot n just took it face value that he was a twinky butch. for three years
I only found out he wasn’t because in tenth grade the topic of old hollywood leading ladies came up w my friends n I went “I think it’s so cool how charlie chaplin did all those drag roles. she was cute too haha” n they all looked at me like I’d said something just truly fucking insane. which for the record I had
no the butch you want is Dorothy Arzner, one of the only women directors from the silent era to continue directing after the transition to sound
she directed a multitude of films about atypical domestic relationships and has two entries in the criterion collection. you should absolutely read about her life, because wow. fascinating figure
Avavav always has the most interesting concepts
Okay this is a BRILLIANT illustration of how the fast fashion industry devours literally everybody it touches, but knowing what I know about models, I'm willing to bet these people JUMPED at the chance to look exactly as they feel on a bad day on the runway and not be fired for it.
There's a viral video circulating from the Fort Worth Zoo, of two keepers who ended up in a habitat at the same time as a silverback gorilla. Spoiler for good news: neither the humans nor the gorilla got hurt. It's a bad situation that ended extremely well, and that's why I want to talk about it.
The audio for this video is mostly someone praying loudly, so if you need to turn the audio off to watch it, you won't miss anything relevant. If you don't want to watch it, here's the summary: it starts with a keeper running around the corner into the main exhibit, pursued by a large male gorilla. She is quickly able to get into a doorway at the back of the exhibit, but does not completely close the door because the gorilla is standing across from her, watching. He eventually moves off to the right hand side of the exhibit, where we can see a keeper is trapped in the corner at the front. She was trying to move towards the exit as he moved to the right, and she stops, standing very still behind a tree, while he stays along the far right wall. They stay like that for a minute, and then the gorilla runs to the front right corner, and the keeper is able to run to the door in the back of the exhibit and get to safety.
Let's start with basic information. Even though it's just going viral now, this video is from October of 2023. It was taken not by a guest, but by the zoo security officer responding to the situation. Hmmm, seems like he maybe should have been doing something else during that situation, instead of than taking a phone video. It's going viral now because the guy (who is no longer employed at the zoo) decided to post it on TikTok for his five minutes of fame. This guy immediately started giving all sorts of media interviews, answering questions like "why no tranquilizers" inappropriately, making memes out of his own video, generally distasteful shit.
Zoo spokesperson Avery Elander gave a public statement that "thankfully, there was no physical contact between keepers and gorilla, and all staff and animals are safe." A comment from the zoo has also indicated that the incident was due to keeper error. (As opposed to, for instance, something in the fencing breaking.) According to the guy who posted the video, a lock was left unsecured and the gorilla was able to open the door to the habitat. I don't know if I buy it, and again, this just... is probably why he doesn't have a job anymore. By sharing that detail - real or not - he places a ton of public scrutiny and blame on that keeper team. (If that's what happened, I can promise you it will have been dealt with internally.) He also was nice enough to say he wouldn't name the women in the video... but verified they're still staffers at the zoo... which means they're eminently identifiable! Excuse me while I ragequit for a second.
So there's two reasons I wanted to talk about this. The first is to make sure it is well known that this guy is purposefully and intentionally exploiting the worst day of someone's life for media attention. Their lives were in danger, and he's using it for fame. His name is in the media articles - I'm not going to share it because he doesn't deserve that attention. The second reason, though, is because this video is a masterclass on how to survive if you end up sharing space with a gorilla. Every zoo person I've spoken to or seen comment on the video is so, so impressed with how the keepers handled themselves.
The gorilla in this video is 34-year-old Elmo. All apes in AZA zoos are managed in protected contact, so keepers are supposed to be separated from them by a barrier at all times. The zookeepers were in the habitat putting out a mid-day meal when he got out. Watching the video, you can see he's not actively being aggressive towards them - he's not making threat displays or trying to approach them. Mostly, Elmo seems like he doesn't know what is going on and he's kinda freaked out about it. (This is confirmed in the zoo's press statement, too). The staff stayed calm, and importantly, watched and waited to see how he'd move and act.
The zoo did say one thing, though, that's a bit misleading. In one article, their press person I quote as saying “In general, gorillas are considered the “gentle giants” of the great ape species.” Just because this may be true in comparison to other great ape species doesn't meant gorilla aren't still incredibly dangerous. This type of messaging always worries me, because I think it leads people to misunderstand the risks of being close to megafauna. Gorilla are extremely strong animals, and their social norms/behaviors are very different from that of humans. That's why it's such a big deal any time people end up in gorilla habitats, and why sometimes in those circumstances lethal measures have to be taken to protect human life.
These keepers are incredibly lucky to be unharmed. These women stayed safe specifically because they're trained professionals who knew how to act around gorilla, they knew this particular animal well, and they'd learned the escapes from the exhibit just in case this ever happened. We should applaud them for their cool heads and quick thinking.
As for the guy who posted the video? As a colleague put it, may he always step on a Lego.
The keepers did everything right- they must have a really good sense of the big guy's body language, because it looks like they were taking really good care not to excite him any more than he already is. This could have been an extremely bad situation, and the fact that the security guy just stood there and filmed it and then put it on TikTok...
well, I think he deserves harsher than stepping on a Lego. Blacklisted from the industry seems appropriate because even if he wasn't going to use tranqs, the fact that he pulled out his phone and started filming means that he was willing to be distracted in an extremely risky situation. By filming instead of giving his undivided attention and being ready to react, he made a dangerous situation worse!
What the security guy should have been doing: keeping the public calm, getting them out of there. Commotion from people at viewing windows absolutely could have upset Elmo and exacerbated the danger of the situation. (This is actually what happened with Harambe - witnesses noted that the screams of the people watching spooked him.) He also should have been keeping an eye on the situation and reporting back to management as needed - for instance, on if the situation devolved and they might have needed to call up the dart/gun team.
The responding security officer would not have been the person using tranquilizers. Zoos have specifically trained DART teams (dangerous animal response teams) that respond to situations like this. There's a lot of complicated factors to using tranquilizers: they don't knock an animal down immediately, and they can be come more dangerous when aggravated by being hit with a dart before it takes effect; tranquilizers have to be dosed for the animal's body weight and must be prepared by vet staff; tranquilizers and dart guns and also actual guns are always stored safely and require some time to access (e.g. in safes). The first person on the scene, even if they were part of the dart team, needs to stay and monitor what's happening.
There's always safety protocols for all of this stuff. Zoos put a ton of time into contingency planning and doing drills for possible adverse events. This dude did not follow any of it.
So I’ve seen a few posts going around lately about philosemitism, but mostly in the context of people being called out for it, and it’s occurring to me that if you don’t have a frame of reference for it, you probably don’t understand why it’s really a very bad thing.
So I’m going to share a story that happened to me a few years ago, when I was studying for my b’nei mitzvah.
This lady pulls into my drive thru at work. She’s wearing a MAGA hat, and before I can hide my Magen David necklace—this was not that long after Charlottesville—she absolutely GUSHES “oh, you’re Jewish?” and immediately starts going on about beautiful traditions, Jesus was Jewish, yadda yadda. (All the Jews reading this are currently nodding because they’ve all met this woman at least once.)
And then she gets to the part I want to highlight for the goyim, the learning part of this:
Her: And we need to stick together, because you know what’s right in the middle of Jerusalem, right?
Me: …..the Temple? (It’s not, it’s at the city’s edge, but I could see someone hearing “center of religious and cultural life” and making an assumption.)
Her: no!
Me: …….the Knesset?
Her: no! How do you spell Jerusalem?
Me, thinking she saw the Hebrew book next to me: yod-reish-shin-lamed—-
Her: no, no! U-S-A! J-E-R-U-S-A! The United States is part of Israel!
Y’all.
This woman.
Legitimately believed.
That “Jerusalem.”
Was the name.
Of a Jewish city.
In a language.
THAT DOES NOT HAVE A “J” SOUND.
She literally told me I was wrong when I pronounced it Yerushalayim, which is the Hebrew transliteration of the older “Urusalim,” which is the original name of the city in the Canaanite languages circa 1500 BCE. (An even older inscription has been found in Egyptian, but it’s a little wonky because the two languages didn’t have the exact same sounds—think of how an English word spoken by a Japanese person and then transliterated as they said it would look.) “Jerusalem” as a form literally cannot occur until after the word has filtered through Latin and into English—at the earliest, the 3rd or 4th century CE—because there’s no J in Latin, either.
THIS is philosemitism: this woman wanted so badly for Judaism to be her fun toy that she completely ignored Jewish reality. We weren’t actually people to her; we were a thing for her to exotify. When actual Jewish experience refuted her she ignored it, but many philosemites will get angry when they’re faced with reality.
If you’re thinking “wow, that sounds a lot like fetishization,” you’re right, because it is. It’s fetishization crossed with the kind of “support” a lot of people offer the queer community, where they love it when it’s waving rainbow flags and “oh my g-d, girl, slay,” but the moment it’s anger over the STD crisis or the underserving of homeless queer youth, they dip. They’re only around while it’s ~*~*~aesthetic.~*~*~
Philosemitism isn’t “loving Jews too much.” It’s loving a stereotyped ideal you put on a pedestal, and not allowing for diversity of Jewish experience.
Rich people showers
reblogging for that gif
i’m sorry i couldn’t help myself
Not gonna not reblog this….
The drawings are a necessary addition. (Gargle shower and fireplace showers still best)
*muffled screams*
maya angelou saying the funniest thing anyone has ever said about editing, which i can never let myself forget EVER AGAIN [x]
the idea of public restrooms as "women's spaces" continues to confound me. you know who I hope is in a public bathroom when I go in?? no one. I would prefer no one else be in the bathroom. and if someone else is in the bathroom I am going to ignore them as much as possible. I did not go into the bathroom to connect with other women. I went into the bathroom to piss and/or shit. it's a toilet's space, not a women's space. shut the fuck up and let trans people piss and shit in peace. let's all continue to avoid eye contact with each other and any and all interaction in the toilet's space.
From the article:
NASA has released a free, original tabletop role-playing game, and it’s one part educational experience and another part sci-fi/fantasy epic with magic and dragons. The crux of The Lost Universe, the organization’s first TTRPG,involves a mystery: What would happen if the Hubble Space Telescope disappeared? It’s a simple premise and one that hides the complex backstory underscoring the events of the role-playing game. Without getting into the weeds, the game takes place on a planet called Exlaris, which was once thrown into chaos when a black hole moved too close and kicked it out of its orbit. The planet has since gone back to some degree of normalcy and is now almost completely dedicated to academia. In one city, a scholar named Eirik Hazn made a spell to connect with Earth to study the Hubble Space Telescope, which has famously collected data on black holes. However, the spell and telescope are stolen by a dragon, and researchers working on the project have been disappearing, so the players — Earthlings who worked on the telescope at NASA who were brought through a portal to Exlaris — have to save the day. The official 44-page gameplay book is available to download for free on NASA’s website. You can play it in a party with 4-7 players, but you may need to fudge a few things to graft this narrative onto your TTRPG system of choice. The book says it’ll take around 3-4 hours to get through the adventure.
Leverage had a lot of well-researched things to say about the real world, but the one I always come back to, from The Double Blind Job:
Sophie: These are not small fines. Last year, my department handled a case where the company had to pay out $2.5 billion.
Hoffman: Oh, yeah. Everybody heard about that. But what the news didn’t tell you is that that company made $16 billion on the same drug. That fine was 14% of the profit. 14%. That’s like tipping your waiter.
“A fine is a price” – John Rogers, creator of “Leverage”
the movie really undersells the fact that frodo spent half a year planning to make his departure from the shire as inconspicuous as possible and merry and pippin and sam saw him doing that, figured out he was leaving the shire and that it had something to do with bilbo’s ring, and then spent nearly as long preparing to go with him. icons
worth nothing to people who havent read the books: they didnt tell him they were planning to come with him until the very last minute when he’s finally about to spill the beans, and merry’s just kind of ”yo frodo you have the worst poker face in the shire and you constantly walk around saying shit like ”oughhh i do wonder if i shall ever look down this path again oughhwh woe” out loud for everyone to hear” and frodo just sits there like
AND and. frodo's like don't try to stop me from leaving!! i must go!! and the girlies are like SILLY BILLY we mean to go with you!! and he's like NO NO you don't get it i'm probably gonna DIE!! and they're like no no YOU don't get it we KNOW!! you think we'd let you march off to your doom alone??
okay but don't forget fredegar "fatty" bolger...the one hobbit who was like "I see you're going on some sort of quest...have fun with that, I'll stay here and housesit" and then the freaking NAZGÛL come visit while he's housesitting
Job hunting is fun… I have experience of doing nothing for over a year.
I… I don’t … know how to answer this…
ABOUT TIME!!! for those out of the loop homeowners’ associations in the US 1. suck horrendously in every way 2. were the beginning of the end of urban biodiversity
