if i were ever isekai'd id wanna be one of those pokemon mystery dungeon isekai protags. id be so good at being a creature little guy, having a homoerotic relationship with my best furry friend, shooting fireballs out of my face at pokemon driven wild by eternally shifting dungeons, eating berries, staggering under the weight of an impending apocalyptic destiny, wearing a little scarf, dying, and eating more berries

Happy Birthday to Vanilla Extract.

So. Today in class we assigned Macbeth roles to students to read. When I asked the class who wants to be Lady Macbeth, a young man raised his hand. I kind of stared at him like “Lady Macbeth,” and he nodded like “I know what I’m about ma’am.” So then the student who ended up as Macbeth raised his hand and said “HE’S THE ONE, HE’S MY WIFE!” So I said “yeah sure why not,” and the entire class period they were blowing kisses to each other and winking at each other, and every now and then Macbeth would say “I’m the luckiest man on Earth” and Lady Macbeth would put a hand to his chest, and be like “BABE!”.

I just stared at them, knowing that they CLEARLY have never read ‘Macbeth’ before, so… all this lovey dovey… I don’t know if I have the heart to tell them the truth.

Update:

THIS is what “boys will be boys” ACTUALLY means

Posting hole

Lol

yeah yeah carbon nanotubes. but what about the copper nanotubes.

I bet you'd need some high quality copper for that huh?

not again you mesopotamian son of a bitch

A professor gave us an extra credit option: take a picture of yourself outside, doing something that you would not usually do. We were told not to take it too seriously. Here is my entry:

I maintain that sticking my head in the mailbox is not something I do on a regular basis.

Love that some of you are reblogging this. You looked at a picture of a guy with his head in a mailbox and went "yeah"

Can't wait to see if everyone did something like this or if they had a normal reaction. I will keep you posted.

[ID: a photo of a pale person wearing a black t-shirt and jeans with his head in a mailbox /END ID]

Hello to everyone asking for an update!

The professor has said that he will put all submitted pictures into a powerpoint to be shown in class tomorrow (Tuesday, March 9th). I am very much looking forward to seeing the reaction from him and from the rest of the class. I promise to keep you informed.

Update: the professor saved my picture for last. I was told that I had "truly embodied the spirit of the assignment" and that I had gone "above and beyond."

Also, to everyone who is worrying about whether or not I got my head out, I was gifted with a very small head, and while I got out just fine I would NOT recommend this if you have a large head or even a normal sized head.

Hey you guys should make this into a meme.

Hows this?

Perfect

2017-2018 Subaru Forester

I love it here.

when a human infant is in the womb, moments from being be born, a vague figure of glowing amber light appears before them. in one hand, it holds a small soapstone carving of a coiled eel. in the other hand it holds a mortar and pestle made of polished red quartz. it bids the infant to choose between these two things, but we don't know the significance of this choice, because all babies throughout history with no exception have always picked the soapstone eel. so that's still one of the big mysteries out there.

Don't like THAT

don't jump the gun, he has the only good healthcare in the UK

been keeping this image on hand for these specific situations

Blue Tube Quilt - optical Illusion 

Montse Forcadell Biasco

Cambrils Tarragona Spain

Spanish Patchwork Association Show.

One time I ate probably way too many mushrooms and I could feel my trip going bad. So, I turned to my roommate and I said something along the lines of,

"I feel amazing but I feel like this sensation has a price and I'm about to pay it."

To which he responded, "What are you, catholic?" And that knocked me so firmly out of my mental state that the rest of the trip was hands down the best time I ever did mushrooms.

Yeah that's fair, those tags should part of the main post

art takes so long and its so tiring but if i dont make art for the rest of my life ill die

i dont understand AI tech bros. "it streamlines the process so you dont have to spend as much time making it" why do it at all then if you just want to skip straight to the end? isn't that the fun part? don't you love sketching and redoing concepts over and over again and making it better and going over it again and again until you make something that really feels like it's yours even if it's not "perfect" in a technical sense? isn't that the whole point?

It's a fantastic point, but John Boyega's net worth also puts him at $6 million. When he says eat the rich, he isn't safe either...

There’s a pretty big fucking difference between six million and one trillion lmao

Not to mention the way the money was made

An actor being paid for a role / doing some advertising is a world away form a man setting up a cooperate money machine that horrendously exploits workers

people really need to remember this image

John Boyega is a successful laborer. Jeff Bezos and his successor Andrew Jaffey (you all need to know his name, he's the one making decisions at Amazon now) are exploiters of labor.

Here's something I heard that really helped me contextualize the difference between a million and a billion.

1 Million seconds is 12 days

1 Billion seconds is 31.7 years

Multiplayer games with two factions be like "Who will you join;"

"The GLORIANUS MAGNIFICUS, a kingdom of honor, morality, beauty, and faith..."

"Or the CRINGEFUCKS, a clan of dishonorable barbarians who kick puppies and drown babies and worship Satan?"

And literally without fail 75% of the game's population plays Cringefuck.

VALID.

gay people have access to a secret low res version of spongebob where every scene is him going through it or dead completely naked

Hey kids, wanna learn what signs of botulism look like?

Since the sell by date wasn't for another 4 days I returned them. I was checking out at the store and I was like "i'm not sure you want to take them out of the bag" and he did and a passing manager was just like "That looks like a bomb, I'm just gonna take it to the back" and was off like a shot.

Okay but seriously, if you have a package of food like this or especially if you have a can that is bulging like this, it is literally full of poison, do not open it and absolutely positively do not eat it under any circumstances.

Any food packaging that is bulging has to be considered unsafe to eat. A lot of people who might be living on their own for the first time don't know what that looks like, and this is a really, really extreme example, but yeah if the top of a can has become slightly domed from internal pressure that's going to kill you, don't eat it.

"ooh you hate cops but who are you gonna call when you get robbed?" uhhhhh your moms house? a great tragedy has befallen me and i need to have sex immediately

Every time someone’s like “who are you gonna call when you get robbed?”

1. Know how I know you’ve never been robbed?

2. I am going to call my insurance company and file a claim, the only usefulness a cop has at this point is generating a report number for said insurance company to refer to

3. Seriously all a cop’s gonna do after establishing that the robber/burglar/whoever isn’t there anymore is say “what do you want me to do about it?” and leave

Also:

So, ya know.

“Oh if you hate cops so much and get robbed, what then huh?”

“Statistically speaking, ask them for my shit back”