Instructions on Food: Cook 20-24 minutes.

Me: Using my Superior Intellect, I have deduced that the Optimal Cooking Time is precisely… 22 minutes. 

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We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

or

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

this is a picture of the human brain at the moment of death. tragic and beautiful

Fuck. That is a damn good nomination.

if you close your eyes when the train hits your brain will assume you are dead. Some find this comforting.

We’re getting into the good ones now. This is some classic Tumblr.

Two old favourites:

“Bitch, That’s the Tubby Custard Machine” (http://imgur.com/gallery/IObQF)

and the horse dildo that was passed off as someone’s arm. (http://abakkus.tumblr.com/post/48958415162)

This is rapidly becoming a master post of ignorances and I could not possibly be happier.

Rare blue watermelon

That disease where you get purple eyes, no period, and no body hair

How have we gone this far without anyone mentioning the bird in the chocolate fountain

soap makes water molecules smaller

I nominate the “we are killing the earth” picture of the earth in comparison from 1978 to 2012

the dog with the slice of ham on its face that everyone thought was a gigantic burn scar

“Tequila is the only alcohol thats not a depressant so you can drink as much of it as you like”

that post with the picture of the joker without makeup and people thinking it was a real person and defending him

that photo of voldemort being passed off as an aborted fetus

The two way mirror

“listen here, cumslut.”

I can’t believe you guys forgot someone trying to pass off a picture of the inside of a fig as a microscopic view of the inside of a vagina.

this is like staring directly into the sun during an eclipse

Y’all talk weird on here. Sometimes I see a post and i agree but y’all talk weird so I’m like fuckYou.

Someone’s probably already done this, but alignment chart of “realistic” cgi or cgi that tried to stay as close to the original as possible. I don’t not take constructive criticism

I see stuff like this every once in a while and it reminds me the kids are still alright

I have no idea what is going on but I watched this like 20 times

The Four Comandments

the authoritarian right’s obsession with not jacking off is the funniest thing ever they’re like monks but racist

beats being a godless degenerate from the left

kills me every time

@jaune-valjeen