I did do that and I was assaulted (spanked)
Be me, looking at f1nn5ter: damn it's a good thing I'm pan because this is very confusing, but I have 20 bucks to check out that onlyfans, wish me luck comrades 🫡
That’s today. Not 5 years from now. Today. Instead, the federal minimum wage has been stuck at $7.25 since it was last raised on July 24, 2009. http://dlvr.it/T4GQDm
This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking name is fucking meatloaf
Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when they would be home and so he couldn’t plan for them to be able to join the family for dinner, but he knew with no doubts that dear sweet Meatloaf staying in that exact position for hours was an absolute in this scenario. Truly, that cat was named well.
one of my favorite posts on tumblr over the course of 5 fucking years.. clearly i need a life
Meatloaf is a reliable cat and did not steal the money for selfish reasons. A rare friend.
I love Meatloaf. :)
Bless Meatloaf
Reblog Money Meatloaf to get surprise $40
Always reblog Meatloaf!
Ok so at this point I've had two people roll up to me in manual wheelchairs, well, one of them was somebody pushing somebody who was nonverbal at the time, but it still counts. They asked me why I had zip ties around my tires.
It's winter where I'm living and we have really bad snow. And the snow plow people are really bad at their jobs probably because there aren't snow plow people who clean sidewalks. As a solution I got to thinking about how I could increase the traction on my wheels. And the most redneck thing I could think of was taking a bunch of zip ties and tying them around my wheels. They last surprisingly long, and work surprisingly well. It's basically the same premise as chains for your tires during the winter.
I chose to space them out pretty evenly so there's about one for every spoke. You could probably do more or less depending on how many you want and how much traction you get but I wouldn't go more than three per spoke. I realize that it's a bit later in the winter, and I probably should have made a post about this sooner, but I came up with it about a week ago. So please share this, even if you're not disabled, because there are tons of people I know who are stuck in their houses because they can't get around in the snow. A pack of zip ties costs about $5, which compared to $200 knobby snow tires is a big save, and if you want to invest you could get colored zip ties.
"do you seriously think you're above the rules" the stupid ones yeah
if you want me to follow the rules you have to make sure they're not stupid. this isn't a difficult concept to grasp.
Where's Brennan
just a perfect lil gentleman
Henry was a delight
you almost can’t make this shit up.
the police drive their SUV into a gay couples place of business and then proceeds to arrest one of them for refusing to show identification. allegedly they were swerving to avoid a dog which totally exists
what kind of shit is this.
sorry i drove through your bar but uhhhhh can i see some identification please
hey this gets worse
apparently one of the owners of the bar are still in police custody and had been moved 3 different times overnight before being finally booked in to central booking at 9am this morning.
yes, one of the owners who had their bar destroyed.
apparently one of the transfers was to the hospital because three cops jumped this man after driving through his business. can anyone explain why someone would go from south district, then to the hospital, then the to north district and then central booking?
annnnddd they were apparently being homophobic.
this is from a 3rd, separate article:
is it any wonder where this is all headed?
these motherfuckers cannot drive
at this point i've run out of jokes. i don't even know what's happening anymore.
to recap, in the last 6 months:
- August 15th 2023 - crashed into a church sign, covered it up
- December 12th 2023 - flipped an SUV
- December 18th 2023 - Bar:PM crash
- January 1st 2024 - hit someone on a moped
- January 7th 2024 - flipped an SUV
- February 2nd 2024 - crashed and overturned a car
- February 8th 2024 - crashed into a church fence
- February 21st 2024 - crashed into a fire station
Not even a full month apart flipped an SUV twice
Ever notice how any time someone calls you "cringe", 99 times out of 100 what they mean is "you're happy and I don't like it"
No one ever calls bullying cringe. No one ever calls rudeness cringe. No one ever calls toxic negativity cringe. Only hobbies get called cringe. Only enjoying things get called cringe. Only jokes and mannerisms and interests get called cringe.
Enjoyment is always derided while cruelty is lauded because when you're too much of a coward to be emotionally sincere, the former makes you uncomfortable and the latter makes you feel better about yourself.
Then let's call assholes cringe, don't get the issue here, we already call people based for being themselves sometimes
If true we HAVE to make this the biggest flop in gaming history, as in 'destroys the company' levels of gaming flop as in a 'lesson must be taught' gaming flop, as in 'E.T. destroyed atari' gaming flop
reminder
The amount of times I've quoted "I'll kill them with knives, I'll kill them with guns, I'll kill them with my hands, I'll talk them into suicide if I have to" would terrify some people, but it's usually when we're talking politics, so it's cool
I can't be the only person who immediately looked for the least common ones to try and use them more, right?
Scumwit and dirt goblin are pretty great, tbh.
I'm more interested in the mid-range. People actually call others dipclown, buttgoblin, and poopboy??
Imma claim douche goblin though that'll be my go to
Julius Caesar memes are fun and all, but make sure you don’t forget the true meaning of the holiday: Stabbing the fuck out of politicians for their flagrant, self-serving abuse of power.
God what a downgrade. Why didn't they just keep improving the drawn looking style.
"Look at how realistic these made up things are"
WENT INTO A STARDEW FUGUE STATE LADS ITS FOUR THIRTY AM MY SLEEP SCHEDULE IS FUCKED GOOD NIGHT
ok so i have this like. massive amount of fruits and wine stored up for casking and then selling but i realized. that since it takes a whole fucking season for wine to go up a quality level. it will be like so many in game years to iridium all this wine.
more years than it is possible to fit between now and tuesday. so i may as well just sell the bulk low quality wine.
i'm at 9.5mil.
i started this farm in 2016 and maybe i'm not ready to let it go yet.
ya i maintain an inventory of 90 bottles of wine in a chest to cycle through the casks I've got stuffed in the basement, but otherwise wine gets sold the second it's done fermenting. RN I'm working on filling a second large shed with kegs and a ginger island starfruit farm
WELL I FUCKED UP AGAIN.
got home at 5ish after walking around the outside of comicon for a bit, showered, ate food and played a bit of flash game..... and proceeded to pass THE FUCK OUT. its nearly 10 pm now
fuckkkkk
I hate how long casking wine takes in stardew that's why I take the lesser payday on mead, only takes one season
Lá ‘le Pádraig faoi mhaise ☘
The World’s Most Special Girl Loves to Headbutt My Broken Leg
Trying to rebreak it